PHASE I [ 10 00 ] No matter how you feel about reading activities, you’re going to the library today. Whether you accepted that flier and its promise of 1000 credits if you came to experience the joys of reading, or you didn’t and one of the truancy bots grabbed you and dragged you there, kicking and screaming, the fact of the matter is that you’re going to the library. Today.
Now that you're here though, remember to please be quiet while in the library. The librarian will not appreciate it if you’re loud.
In fact, said librarian will gladly hunt you down if you’re loud. She hasn't had lunch yet and you look ever so tasty, after all. If you don't want to be eaten though, apologies and a hefty donation to the library will get her to back down. See how simple that was? And all you had to do was shut your piehole.
Also hey look, all of your friends are here too! You should go read with them. Quietly.
Welcome to the library.
PHASE II [ 1015 ] And once you’re in the library, well… you may feel drawn to a book. It can be any book. It may not even be the typical sort of book that you’d read. But you’re drawn to it, you pick it up, you read a few pages, and then something happens.
The effects may take hold slowly and worsen over time, or they may immediately grab you by the throat, but either way, you’re no longer acting quite like yourself.
And now that you’ve read a book, you’re allowed to leave the library without a fuss, book now safely in your arms along with your new CERES-issued library card app on your CereVice. The app is handy for things like seeing if a certain book is at the library or checked out, requesting for a specific title to be available, renewing books from the comfort of your home and checking on events happening weekly. (Tuesday Afternoon is the "Romance Lovers Book Club" and it seems to be personally recommended by Mosley himself! Wow!) Look at how handy that is! Of course, you can also try to escape through the windows without a book, but nobody will let you leave until you’ve at least checked out at least one.
Reading is good for you, kids.
PHASE III [ 100 ] Either way, you’ve escaped the library, right? You’re safe now, even if everyone around the city is acting totally strange. And, for a day or two, everything will just stay that way. Everything will probably be fine, right?
Wrong.
The third night after this disaster began, you’ll find yourself back in the library. You don’t know how you got there or why but you sure are here. One moment you were asleep in your bed, or reading like the night owl you are, and the next you’re in the middle of the library, wearing whatever you wear late at night. No judgment here, you rock those pikachu pajamas. You really do. ... Oh wait, you weren't wearing pikachu pajamas? Oops. You are now.
Anyway, the library is completely dark, and eerily quiet. But there are skitterings of creatures right outside of your field of vision, and no matter how you try, you can’t find a light switch. While nothing is jumping out at you immediately, this is also Cerealia. Who knows what’s lurking out there in the dark? Maybe you should take a swing and see what happens.
Of course, if you do get the zombie skeletons, you should feel bad about it; it seemed they were just trying to sort the books with a lot of enthusiasm. It's not their fault you were in their book-sorting way.
(Or... maybe it’s just your friends. It sure would be bad if you killed them. Please don’t kill them and get blood all over the books.)
PHASE IV [ 645 ] From the sun shining through the windows, it... seems to be morning. Yayyyy! You survived the night.
But you also made a mess. There are books everywhere, along with (re)dead zombie corpses, and they need to be sorted back into their proper places. You do know the system that Cerealia’s books are sorted by, right? Of course you do.
... What the heck is a Dewey Decimal System?
Well, either way you’d better get to work fast, because if the books aren’t sorted, you will be. If you inspect the corpses, you might notice that there's something off about them. That maybe they weren't there to attack you last night but to... clean up the library. And you stopped them, oh. So now it's your job to sort through this mess and if you don't, a certain giant metal claw will happily grab you and stuff you into a bookshelf regardless of whether or not your limbs fit.
(Also wow, rude, did the claw sort you onto the dinosaur erotica shelf?)
Either way, you can probably leave once the librarian gets here and forget this whole PR stunt ever happened. Thanks for reading with CERES!
BONUS [ xxxx ] So, remember those book clubs? It seems like they're not doing nearly as well as the library would hope (even with their sponsorship from Mosley!) so the library has decided to do something about that. Sometime during the next week, even if the effects of that book you checked out have worn off, you might be approached by some robots (holy shit are they huge too). They don't look friendly either. They'll have the official Cerealia Library logo on their chest and when they spot you they'll make a beeline right over, so you might want to run.
They're here to collect you and no matter how many times you try and outrun them, they'll just keep coming back. If you finally give in, don't mind the robot as it scoops you up (bridal style, naturally) and carries you straight to the library.
When you get there, everything's less threatening, of course. You'll be dropped right at the circle of chairs with everyone else (maybe you see a friend there too) and given a book to read. Is this... is this dinosaur erotica again? Of course it is. (Or maybe it's the robot western, the zombie noir? All these genres to choose from!)
And it seems like those robots aren't going to let you leave until you've given a detailed, thoughtful account of the main character's struggle either. They want to see tears.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
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iii
Deal with the monsters? Hah! I can deal with them. [Never mind that he was brought here without his sword, or his gun. He's got his CRAU powers! Edgeworth begins clenching his fists, pulling himself into a fighting stance.]
no subject
A-are you sure? What if they try to eat your brain?! [ He slaps a hand across his forehead. ] Where's my magical staff when I need it?
no subject
no subject
Well, uh - ooookay. Go for it, then.
[ LET'S SEE YOU IN ACTION, DUDE. ]
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Instead, he thrusts a hand out and grabs its skull. Electric blue light fans out from his hand, crackling and lighting up that part of the library briefly before the poor skeleton crumbles into a pile of bones. After that, Edgeworth makes a big show of dusting his hands off.]
no subject
Dipper provides some politely shocked applause. ]
Wow, okay. Youuuuuu really gave it to him, huh?
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As you can see, my brain and yours are perfectly intact.
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I just wish my perfectly intact brain had thought to keep my staff on me at all times. Why are there even zombies in the library at night?
[ ...A beat. ] Did you get some sweet EXP from finishing him off?
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I should hope so. I deserve a reward for that. [Look at that insufferable smug smirk. It deserves to be wiped off his face.] But no zombies will keep us from finding the truth about this strange library!
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Maybe this is actually the lair of a necromancer. [ He glances at the pile of bones. ] We should search its remains for sweet bonuses or keys or something.