[flynn manages to dodge this time around and retaliates by launching himself at yuri's torso, effectively tackling him to the ground. within seconds, he has the other man in a half-assed pin and stares down at him with burning blue eyes. no move to punch or the like comes. for now.
the hurt behind some of those words doesn't get missed. subtle the tone might be, but they've known each other for over half their lives. catching small stuff like that? comes easy. all the subtle hurt does is cause the determination within in him to rise, the determination to get his own points across. wanting good for others sums up what yuri wants; where that falls short, however, is him not realizing what people want for him. so many people care for him. so many people want him to be happy. no one wants this life for him, the life of the vigilante that willing throws everything away.]
Bullshit. You may have had good intentions, but you never thought about us beyond what you assumed would be best for us. You made the choice to bear it alone even though none of us would have wanted that! [his angered expression becomes more pained, if briefly.] None of us want you to die. I don't want you to die, especially not bearing the things you believe I can't shoulder.
[it was bad enough believing yuri died at zaude as a results of flynn failing. yuri dying because he had to pull flynn's own weight for him... god, the mere thought of it hurts. picturing a noose tighten around his best friend's neck all for a crime done to help further the commandant's glory... his stomach twists at the mental image. he is NOT weak enough to allow that. after taking a deep breath, the intense expression returns full swing.]
You're right, I'll never know what your burdens feel like, but you'll never know how it feels like to watch someone so willingly damn themselves and think nothing of it. How can you say I haven't screwed up when you had to resort to what you've done to get me to where I am!? I need to be perfect to keep you from doing anything else you know you'll regret! I don't want you to have to bear any more of my burdens and watch you die for it!!
[perfection needs to happen. the alternative is imperfect and imperfect can lead to yuri picking up more and more of his burdens. it'd be another horrid screw up. the others already hang so heavily over flynn's head and another would even more so. maybe the sword won't be in his hand if another murder occurs but it might as well be. his imperfections are what will lead to it happening. if it means giving up everything, giving up having fun and being human and, hell, working himself to death, then it's fine. no one else needs to suffer because of some idiot knight's shortcomings, not yuri, not anyone.]
no subject
the hurt behind some of those words doesn't get missed. subtle the tone might be, but they've known each other for over half their lives. catching small stuff like that? comes easy. all the subtle hurt does is cause the determination within in him to rise, the determination to get his own points across. wanting good for others sums up what yuri wants; where that falls short, however, is him not realizing what people want for him. so many people care for him. so many people want him to be happy. no one wants this life for him, the life of the vigilante that willing throws everything away.]
Bullshit. You may have had good intentions, but you never thought about us beyond what you assumed would be best for us. You made the choice to bear it alone even though none of us would have wanted that! [his angered expression becomes more pained, if briefly.] None of us want you to die. I don't want you to die, especially not bearing the things you believe I can't shoulder.
[it was bad enough believing yuri died at zaude as a results of flynn failing. yuri dying because he had to pull flynn's own weight for him... god, the mere thought of it hurts. picturing a noose tighten around his best friend's neck all for a crime done to help further the commandant's glory... his stomach twists at the mental image. he is NOT weak enough to allow that. after taking a deep breath, the intense expression returns full swing.]
You're right, I'll never know what your burdens feel like, but you'll never know how it feels like to watch someone so willingly damn themselves and think nothing of it. How can you say I haven't screwed up when you had to resort to what you've done to get me to where I am!? I need to be perfect to keep you from doing anything else you know you'll regret! I don't want you to have to bear any more of my burdens and watch you die for it!!
[perfection needs to happen. the alternative is imperfect and imperfect can lead to yuri picking up more and more of his burdens. it'd be another horrid screw up. the others already hang so heavily over flynn's head and another would even more so. maybe the sword won't be in his hand if another murder occurs but it might as well be. his imperfections are what will lead to it happening. if it means giving up everything, giving up having fun and being human and, hell, working himself to death, then it's fine. no one else needs to suffer because of some idiot knight's shortcomings, not yuri, not anyone.]