[he doesn't make an attempt to move from flynn's grip, but his tone of voice shows that he's no less angry than he's been since they've started fighting like this. he's back to a glower, rather than the yelling, but maybe that's because flynn's words have hit home hard.
after all, he's not wrong about some of these things, hard-pressed as he may be to admit it. being so accustomed to only thinking about what he needed to do for himself gave yuri pretty bad perspective on what other people want or need. and even though he cares deeply for all of his friends, he doesn't necessarily have the foresight to realize that what he feels is better (not burdening them with his dark choices), it doesn't mean that's actually the case. but even knowing that, even being forced to hear so harshly how much it really hurts them doesn't entirely change his mind.
if anything, it just meant that given the chance, he'd have been more careful to not get caught, so nobody else would have to bear any of it. he'd still rather suffer alone than make anyone else have to bear that weight. he can't take back the things he did, and he can't take back the fact that everyone knows it and has to live with it, either.
all the same, it doesn't change his reasons, either. and it doesn't change the fact that they're not things flynn should have to bear. "i can handle the dirty work. you go all the way to the top." it's the mentality he holds, because he can do the things flynn can't. he can be the criminal, he can take the fall, he can do the things a knight can't and shouldn't.
(and won't. and haven't.) he's doing what's just, regardless of what it means for his own fate. the fate of one man can't trump the fate of a whole empire. he can't let that happen.]
They're the Empire's screw-ups. [he'll finally say that after a moment, and that's also when yuri takes the opportunity to shove flynn off him. it's not as much force as his punch from earlier, just enough to get free so he can sit up. the state of his hair is long forgotten at this point, his fists pressing deeply against the ground before he continues.] This goes above you. This is the core of what the Empire does, and even with you at the helm of the Knights, what could you do? Do you think Cumore or Ragou would have stopped and listened to you? They were beyond saving, Flynn. Someone had to do these things, because you couldn't, especially not then.
[maybe now things will be different. but then, flynn didn't have nearly as much pull. he had to earn that. of course, part of that is because of the things yuri had done—but that's why he did them. why can't flynn just accept that? if he has to have a burden, let it be the knowing that yuri will willing to go that far for his best friend. yuri doesn't want the glory when he does good things, he just wants to see the world change so his friends and extended family don't have to suffer for the empire's greed anymore.] Get it through your head. I did those things not because you screwed up, but so that you couldn't screw up or get screwed over by how damn broken the system is.
As long as there's something you can't do, I'll make sure to be the one who makes sure it gets done. [which is yuri's way of saying that he doesn't regret what he did. he just regrets that other people got their feelings pulled into it when they should never have been part of it all.]
no subject
[he doesn't make an attempt to move from flynn's grip, but his tone of voice shows that he's no less angry than he's been since they've started fighting like this. he's back to a glower, rather than the yelling, but maybe that's because flynn's words have hit home hard.
after all, he's not wrong about some of these things, hard-pressed as he may be to admit it. being so accustomed to only thinking about what he needed to do for himself gave yuri pretty bad perspective on what other people want or need. and even though he cares deeply for all of his friends, he doesn't necessarily have the foresight to realize that what he feels is better (not burdening them with his dark choices), it doesn't mean that's actually the case. but even knowing that, even being forced to hear so harshly how much it really hurts them doesn't entirely change his mind.
if anything, it just meant that given the chance, he'd have been more careful to not get caught, so nobody else would have to bear any of it. he'd still rather suffer alone than make anyone else have to bear that weight. he can't take back the things he did, and he can't take back the fact that everyone knows it and has to live with it, either.
all the same, it doesn't change his reasons, either. and it doesn't change the fact that they're not things flynn should have to bear. "i can handle the dirty work. you go all the way to the top." it's the mentality he holds, because he can do the things flynn can't. he can be the criminal, he can take the fall, he can do the things a knight can't and shouldn't.
(and won't. and haven't.) he's doing what's just, regardless of what it means for his own fate. the fate of one man can't trump the fate of a whole empire. he can't let that happen.]
They're the Empire's screw-ups. [he'll finally say that after a moment, and that's also when yuri takes the opportunity to shove flynn off him. it's not as much force as his punch from earlier, just enough to get free so he can sit up. the state of his hair is long forgotten at this point, his fists pressing deeply against the ground before he continues.] This goes above you. This is the core of what the Empire does, and even with you at the helm of the Knights, what could you do? Do you think Cumore or Ragou would have stopped and listened to you? They were beyond saving, Flynn. Someone had to do these things, because you couldn't, especially not then.
[maybe now things will be different. but then, flynn didn't have nearly as much pull. he had to earn that. of course, part of that is because of the things yuri had done—but that's why he did them. why can't flynn just accept that? if he has to have a burden, let it be the knowing that yuri will willing to go that far for his best friend. yuri doesn't want the glory when he does good things, he just wants to see the world change so his friends and extended family don't have to suffer for the empire's greed anymore.] Get it through your head. I did those things not because you screwed up, but so that you couldn't screw up or get screwed over by how damn broken the system is.
As long as there's something you can't do, I'll make sure to be the one who makes sure it gets done. [which is yuri's way of saying that he doesn't regret what he did. he just regrets that other people got their feelings pulled into it when they should never have been part of it all.]