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Entry tags:

sanji,
zoro roronoa

[Closed || 003]

Who: Sanji (

yourotherleft)
When: 4/12.
Where: Their apartment.
What: Oh, you know. Event things.
Rating/Warning: Well. There might be some erotica books involved, but fuck knows how that will go... (Spoilers: ridiculous. Ridiculous is how it will go.)

[Welp, Sanji felt that pull to go to the shitty library out of nowhere, same as everyone else! But since he had some free time on his hands, it's not like it even occurred to him to question it. Besides, a huge place like that with all those books was sure to have something interesting regarding the culinary side of this planet. Maybe he'd be able to find a good cookbook or two and get to know more about the local recipes here?

Such were the completely pure and innocent thoughts that bounced around Sanji's head as he wandered through the aisles, eyes casually scanning the shelves as he waited for something to jump out at him. How he COMPLETELY ACCIDENTALLY ended up walking down an ~Adult~ row is a total mystery. And he definitely didn't mean to reach for that book with the busty blonde on the cover, or the one with the voluptuous redhead giving the reader a sultry look.

And he has no idea how he ended up walking back to the apartment with an armful of such books. But they're not all explicitly naughty, at least! There's a couple that are just fluffy romance, with dashing young men on the covers, windswept and shirtless as the heroine of the story clings to them.

Hell, Sanji actually did manage to find some books about cooking, too.

He drops his load onto the coffee table once he's back home, shrugging out of his suit coat and snickering to himself as a beautiful brunette stares up at him with a smoldering gaze, hands running over the sword in her grasp in a positively suggestive manner.

That one...he did not pick up for himself.]

Oi, marimo! Got something for ya.

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[Zoro has missed out on the mayhem thanks to being in the gravity room all day, training extra-hard, but he heard the cook come back. Be glad he actually took a shower when he got back...

He comes barging out of his room, still scuffing a towel over his damp hair.]

Where've you been, shopping? What do you want?

[his eye casts over the stack of books, yet doesn't really register what he's seeing. Books are no big deal, even if he's usually not the one reading them.]

Nah, not shopping -- they opened up a library in the city, I went to check it out. It's got all sorts of shit, Robin-chan would love it.

[Ahh, if only Robin-chan were here~

Sanji picks up the book with the sword on it again, glancing down at the cover.]

They had something about lady swordsmen. Thought you might be interested.

[SO INNOCENT as he holds it out for Zoro to take.]

Huh? What's so special about 'em that they need a whole book about it?

[but he's just curious enough to take the book and look at the cover. INSTANT FROWN.]

The hell kinda book is this? She's not even holding it right!

[SHRUGS.]

Maybe they wanted a book all for themselves.

[Leans over to look at it, like he's actually contemplating what Zoro said and not trying to hold back a laugh.]

Eh, I dunno -- she's probably holding it just fine if she ain't planning on fighting with the shitty thing.

What else would you do with a sword besides fight with it?

[there is no logic to this! Which means that if he wants answers to his very obvious questions, he's going to have to open it and page through it. There's no table of contents, apparently you don't need chapter titles in a book like this.]

'Mistress of Blades' is a dumb name, anyway. There better be some good fighting to make up for it.

Mm...definitely a shitty mystery.

[Helpfully flips a few more pages for him -- or more like he flips through half the book.]

Probably better off starting somewhere in the middle, I hear that's where all the good fighting is. Gotta build up to it, right?

[fends him off with a smack to his hand]

I ain't some kid, stop turning the pages for me! I'll get there when I get there, geez. Read one of your other books, don't read over my shoulder.

[Zoro does want to solve this mystery before he gets too deep, but he's the sort of guy to flip to the end first and then read the rest later. As he skims the page his big thumb is currently marking, a couple of words stand out pretty obviously. Words he probably hasn't seen in actual print before.

Hang on...]

[Holds his hands up in an "alright, alright, backing off!" kind of way, snickering as he does.]

Whatever you say, marimo, just trying to help.

[He does reach for one of the other books -- the one with the busty blonde on the cover, because mmmph -- but instead of reading it, he just kind of opens it to a random spot and holds it in front of his face so that he can peak over the top of it and watch Zoro.]

[it must be quite the sight: he goes from the 'did I really just see that?' confused face, to peering very closely at the open book, nose almost to the page (as if zooming in helps, it really doesn't) with a look of pure determination on his face...

...to sudden wide-eyed shock, followed briefly by disgust and then he's slamming the book shut and promptly chucking it straight at Sanji's head.]

What the hell are you trying to do?! Turn me into a pervert like you? Keep it to yourself! Augh! I'm gonna need to erase reading that from my memory!

[except he's read just enough to be affected, not that he knows it quite yet...]

[Dodges the book, but only just barely since he's too busy completely busting a gut as laughter explodes out of him.]

What, I thought with the swords and shit it might be your thing! You really didn't even give it a try, you idiot. Maybe you'd like it! Look.

[He'll just help you out again because HE'S THE MOST HELPFUL EVER, lifting the book in his hand once more and focusing on the page as he prowls closer to Zoro. Total shit-eating grin on his face, his voice dropping a notch or two so he can read in an appropriately husky (and dramatic) tone.]

He turned the cigarette deftly between his fingers, pursed his sensuous lips around the filter, and took a long deep drag. The tip of the cigarette flared bright and hot, but, Jean-Marc's gaze burned hotter— Wait, that's boring. Hmm.

[Flips a few more pages, brow furrowing a bit as he searches for something more exciting. It's obvious he's found it when that grin stretches over his face again.]

Here we go. I begin by reclining almost fully; my head rests on the arm of the sofa so that I can watch myself. I pour a small amount of oil over my breasts and set the bottle aside on the small mahogany table by the sofa. Now with both hands I begin to spread the oil around and over my breasts. I take as long as is necessary to make my—

[And then he promptly dissolves into ~~giggles~~ snickers because he's actually thirteen years old. Also maybe the expression on Zoro's face? FUCK KNOWS. If the shitty marimo plant is trying at all to book it the hell out of the living room, Sanji's totally just gonna follow him and read even louder.]

[UGH HIS WORST NIGHTMARE: the cook laughing at him. Laughing. At. Him. Fuck. He wants to punch that grin right off his face.

...you know, he was fine until the cigarette bit, and then there's a sudden rush of heat down Zoro's neck. Why? He can't say, really, it's not like he finds thin fingers and sensuous lips handling cigarettes anything special. But it definitely just got hotter in here, he has to pull at the collar of his t-shirt as if it'll help him breathe.

At least the second passage just turns him embarrassed and weird, part of his brain is going that's what people like? and the rest is still just pissed at Sanji. There's nowhere to run, so he just shoves out a hand, pressing it flat against the cook's face and using it to hold him at an arm's length so he can't get any further up in his personal space.]

Stop reading that shit! Ugh, that's your thing, not mine. Shut up already!

[Grabs at Zoro's wrist to yank his hand away, but he doesn't let go of him after that. He just presses in close instead in an attempt to be as annoying as possible, fingers still curled around him like he hasn't really noticed he's still holding on. His other hand holds the book out of Zoro's reach so he can continue to read almost obnoxiously loudly now.]

I couldn't tear myself away from the intensity in his eyes. My body stirred, a deep yearning pulled from within. With FURY he tore away my underwear until I was naked, my sex glistening— [SNORTS.] Glistening, what the actual fuck. You think any of the other books aren't from the girl's point of view?

[Glances back over his shoulder at the small pile on the coffee table. Maybe the one with the chiseled, half-dressed supposedly-a-pirate on the cover? ...What, it amused him.]

[oh my god dying of embarrassment. It's like Christmas up in here, bright red face and bright green hair. Zoro's never really thought about some of these things but words are pretty powerful, conjuring up bizarre mental images of something like a bear tearing off clothing with its claws. Don't even ask what he envisioned after that.

He doesn't care about the point of view, this just needs to stop. He uses Sanji's grip to his advantage, curling his arm to drag the cook closer and then desperately trying to get the book knocked out of his hand. It involves an unfortunate amount of being pressed up against him.]

STOP READING THAT SHIT! No wonder you're such a goddamn pervert, if that's what you fill your stupid head with all the time!

[Oh fuck, almost caught him being distracted. All that pressing against each other quickly gets worse when Sanji abruptly tries to twist away. Mostly because away is not where he twists to. Since he's still grabbing Zoro and Zoro's got that arm all curled in close, the best Sanji can do to keep the book away from the other man is to turn so that his outstretched arm is angled in the direction opposite from where Zoro can reach. Which means he ends up with his back all awkwardly plastered to Zoro's chest, his own arm actually trapped behind him.]

It's shitty literature, dumbass, it's good for you! It'll make you smarter -- in more ways than one!

[Grunting a little as he fights to keep the book away from Zoro, even though he's really more interested in grabbing that pirate one now. He's also a little breathless just from laughing so damn hard.

At least he can still see the words on the pages, even in this weird, tangled up position.]

He pushed me down onto the table— Wait, weren't they on the couch? Fuck, whatever... And held me there with one hand on my stomach, the other brushing over the curve of my breast. This uninhibited style of sex was new to me, and I was quickly~ growing addicted. I'd never known the rough abandon or carnal intent Jean-Marc showed me. Heh, I could show her some rough abandon.

[...Uh-huh.

Overly thoughtful look.]

Maybe not rough. Wild? [Glances back at Zoro with a smirk.] Passionate, there's a good word.

Stop talking about breasts! [arghlblargh!

Zoro doesn't stop for a second to think about how they're pressed against each other, or that he's not helping by pushing against Sanji in order to reach over his shoulder - or under his arm, let's try both methods - to grab at the book. Damn the fact they're both the same height and so similar in build, his arms aren't long enough. His fingers scrabble at Sanji's forearm, that's all he's got.

Then and only then does he notice that they've somehow gotten wrapped up in something that looks suspiciously like an embrace. Shit! The elbow trapped between them digs into Sanji's back, trying half-heartedly to shove him off so he can get his other hand back. It's not the strongest shove he could possibly muster, it's almost like he doesn't want to push him too far.]

But breasts are shitty fantastic!

[Sanji is enjoying this way too much. He just laughs some more as Zoro scrabbles for the book, squirming and twisting more with every reach and grab. Zoro clues in before he does, so the shove actually catches him off guard and he stumbles forward, finally losing his grip on Zoro.

Which, for some odd reason, strikes him as being kind of a shame.]

Oi, watch it! [Hard to sound angry through SUCH AMUSEMENT, though.] Alright, alright, geez, I'll stop with that one. Look, see? I'm putting it down.

[And he is. He really is!

Except then he picks up the pirate book immediately, of course, and promptly hooks an arm around Zoro's shoulder to draw him in like he's going to share some deep, dark secret with him. And that is a little weird, sure, and there's no way he could ever even begin to explain why he did it, but whatever. More reading!

...After he snorts and shoots Zoro a look.]

For fuck's sake, marimo, you're burning up! [Positively gleeful!] It's just a damn story, what's got you all flustered, huh?

[Not waiting for an answer obviously. Sanji just clears his throat, lets his voice go all husky again, and finds another passage to read.]

His kiss was hot, hungry, demanding. I found myself melting into it, sinking into his touch, seduced by the taste of saltwater on his skin and how he so expertly commanded me with one touch. Rough hands dragged down my chest, shoving me back against the mast and ripping open my shirt. His mouth dropped to ravish my neck and a burning NEED erupted deep inside of me. I felt myself harden against the leg trapped between my— Wait, what the fuck.

[...Um.]

[He really should be more put off by this closeness, right? Not today! Zoro's only protest is a little grumble under his breath, as he finds his burning-hot face a little too close to Sanji's.]

Just a story, right. Shut up, pervert cook, I don't wanna hear any more of your damn stories. I don't care...

[and yet, not pulling away, not shoving Sanji off, not interrupting him from reading another passage either. And this one. Oh, wow. If he was red before, he's approaching infrared now. Zoro makes a sort of strangled noise in the back of his throat, like he tried to gasp and choked on it. What is this book? And why does he want to read more of that one?

Really should be pulling away now. Will totally do so in a moment. Any minute now...]

Moron, no one's keeping you here.

[Aside from Sanji. And his arm.

But the words are practically just a mutter, mumbled entirely absently and with no bite to them at all. He's too distracted, busy frowning at the book even as he keeps reading out of pure curiosity. Again, almost not even aware that he's doing it, almost forgetting that Zoro's right there and this has quickly gone from funny as hell to kiiiind of awkward and weird!

And then he just completely belatedly blurts out:]

This is about two shitty men!

[BECAUSE IT WAS NECESSARY TO ANNOUNCE SUCH AN OBVIOUS THING???

Also, Zoro's face isn't the only one that's red now.]

[he manages to lift his head and give Sanji a total deadpan look]

No shit.

[he's totally not reading over Sanji's shoulder, but at the same time, still not disengaging. He's not turned on (much...) but for some reason he just can't shove the cook off him and go about his day. There's something magnetic demanding that he stay within touching distance.

As long as he's here, he's going to enjoy the sight of a flustered cook. Haha look even the pervy-cook can be embarrassed about something!]

What's the matter, never heard of such a thing before?

[turning tease, because he can!]

[OI TURNING THE TABLES IS NOT ALLOWED.

Sanji has a mental ALKSJDFHKLJAS sort of moment, the blush deepening in his cheeks and ears before he snatches his arm back from Zoro's shoulder in order to shove a hand in his face.

The hell is even the right answer there, it's like WHY ADMIT HE'S HEARD OF IT?! but also he's a dumbass and doesn't want Zoro thinking he knows something Sanji doesn't. Durp.

He ends up just scowling at him, though his hand sort of slips and instead of palming at Zoro's forehead it's sliding back into his hair.]

Fuck off, I've heard of it! I just don't... I'm not. This is—dammit, this shitty thing is gonna be on my fucking account now! I didn't check it out on purpose, what the hell?! Like I really wanna read about...

[Annnd glancing back toward the book.]

Two guys pawing at each other and rolling around the deck of their shitty ship. Or something about being bent over a barrel—fuck.

[Yeah, just gonna drop the damn thing like the book actually burned him or something, even going so far as to shake out his hand. Or maybe he's fanning himself and trying to be sneaky about it. When did it get to be so hot in here?]

[bending over a barrel what now? Ahem. Zoro may have to abscond with this book later. For Science. Yeah.

He's not ignorant of the hand in his hair, he knows it's there and somehow he's not completely repulsed by it. But every time he tells himself to knock it away, to back off, to get out of range, his limbs refuse to obey his brain. He lifts a hand, telling himself he'll shove Sanji back so he can stop touching him god, but instead it rests flat against his chest and slides down to his waist.

The fact that he can't stop touching the cook, despite having absolutely no conscious need or want to do so, is really bizarre.]

What's the matter, afraid your reputation is gonna suffer, Prince?

[like any ladies are going to look at your library card records.]

It might!

[There's the slightest delay before he says the words, just a beat as his breath hitches when Zoro's hand ends up on his waist. Because it's weird -- it is weird, right? It makes his stomach lurch in a way that he's not entirely sure is bad, and worse than that, he feels more of an urge to shift toward Zoro than to completely back away, leave the room, hell, bolt down the hall and lock himself in his bedroom. Surely there's something off here. It absolutely doesn't make sense for Sanji's other hand to find its way beneath Zoro's shirt and toy with the edge of his haramaki.]

Definitely ain't something I need people finding out about somehow. Can't imagine what the hell they'd think.

[He curls his fingers in Zoro's hair, suddenly distracted by how soft it is. Huh. Don't mind him, just peering up at it and maybe petting Zoro a bit.

Totally normal.]

You— [Smell good. What?] —actually showered. Must be a shitty miracle.

Yeah, well. I had a rough workout.

[As much as he isn't interested, in the moment, in Sanji touching him, Zoro can't deny the way it feels. He's never been in this position before but good god, fingers in his hair is something he never knew he needed.

But it's the cook!

This is completely weird, no lie. Not giving two shits about this kind of thing before, not really wanting it to be the cook, still unable to stop. Zoro grits his teeth and swears to all that's holy or unholy that he's going to take a step back, drop his arms to his sides, get out of this room. Go get some booze. Yeah, booze sounds great.

Still doesn't move. How? And why isn't Sanji shoving him off or kicking him in the face?]

So, uh. You got a bunch of shitty porn books from the library. Nothing else?

What?

[Sorry, you were trying to ask an actually pretty legitimate question? Sanji is still distracted by how Zoro's hair feels between his fingers and is vaguely wondering why he's never run his hands through the man's hair before but also feeling faintly concerned that this is now something he apparently wants to do.

Never mind whatever his other hand is doing down by Zoro's haramaki, fiddling and trailing over uncovered skin.]

Oh. No, there's... I got other shit. Cookbooks and stuff. Figured I'd, uh.

[Something.

He presses in closer to Zoro for absolutely no fucking reason at all.]

Learn more about the local cuisine. You know.

[A beat.]

They're not shitty porn, dumbass.

[It's that step closer, more than the fingertips just above his haramaki, that makes Zoro catch his breath rather suddenly. He's still pretty boggled over what's going on, mostly because he can't make it stop. His brain says "shove the cook away from you," but his hands do the exact opposite, moving up his chest as if feeling out the planes of his muscles.

No, just...stop it!

But they don't. His face heats up with a furious blush.]

They've got sex scenes, that's porn.

[wait shit what just came out of his mouth? STOP TALKING ABOUT IT MORON]

What. Uh. What's...going on here?

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