Lili finds her gaze turning to the ground before she can help herself, her own fingers digging into her elbows as she crosses her own arms, though mostly trying to fight her own insecurity. Now she can remember how even when they were at the hot springs, Yona would practice, she would raise her sword and be careful about her swings - her form. She couldn't defeat a grown man but she could still stand against him even when Lili was collapsed.
... there's no easy answer to strength, she knows that. But she thought that her strength could be strictly in the political sphere - perhaps that would be enough.
But as memories of soldiers and the abuse of slaves flashes through her mind, she knows that it's not enough.]
.... I see.
[And she lets out a breath - quietly, but a heavy one nonetheless - and she moves to wipe at her eyes again. What gross emotion she's showing, nearly crying in front of a stranger. Her voice is quieter as she reflects:]
That's always been the answer, hasn't it? [and then she gently clears her throat, wincing a bit as she does because it's still far too raw. how long ago was it that he offered her water? was that even real?] It paid off....
no subject
Lili finds her gaze turning to the ground before she can help herself, her own fingers digging into her elbows as she crosses her own arms, though mostly trying to fight her own insecurity. Now she can remember how even when they were at the hot springs, Yona would practice, she would raise her sword and be careful about her swings - her form. She couldn't defeat a grown man but she could still stand against him even when Lili was collapsed.
... there's no easy answer to strength, she knows that. But she thought that her strength could be strictly in the political sphere - perhaps that would be enough.
But as memories of soldiers and the abuse of slaves flashes through her mind, she knows that it's not enough.]
.... I see.
[And she lets out a breath - quietly, but a heavy one nonetheless - and she moves to wipe at her eyes again. What gross emotion she's showing, nearly crying in front of a stranger. Her voice is quieter as she reflects:]
That's always been the answer, hasn't it? [and then she gently clears her throat, wincing a bit as she does because it's still far too raw. how long ago was it that he offered her water? was that even real?] It paid off....
[A pause and then a decision.]
I don't plan on making you rescue me again.