[She's seen death before--lived through it, lived through countless deaths. Most by their own hand. Many by someone else's.
It's phantom memories-- a knife in her mouth, a rope around her neck, bones broken shoved into a box-- we all return to water. The smell of blood is dizzying and it bothers Yuri more that she's not so bothered by it.
An uneasy feeling of coldness settles in her gut as she wordlessly makes a beeline for the weapon pile. Soon, she knows, she'll have to join that bloodbath. Kill or be killed.
'Could you kill someone"' Souji had asked her once, and Yuri had shrugged. 'If I think of them as bugs, maybe... Maybe it's better not to think of them as human,' had been about her response. Monsters were one thing. Defeating the spirits that attacked her was another. This? Was something else entirely.
'I suppose I'll see when it comes to it,' she'd tried to say, and Souji had warned her that that way of thinking would get her killed. She wondered if she cared about dying. 'It's just a game,' and yet...
The second her fingers curl around the handle of a sword that's not too unlike the sword she'd been practicing with, everything seems to snap into place and the anxiety grows. Her brow furrows--I don't know if I can do this, she thinks--and glances to Neji--But I have to--and she hurries to avoid a collision with an NPC.]
Are you grabbing something too? [Her voice sounds distant to her own ears, and she watches the NPCs like a hawk-- other players like Neji and herself seem more intent on fleeing immediately, while the NPCs seem more intent on actually trying to kill each other and them.]
no subject
It's phantom memories-- a knife in her mouth, a rope around her neck, bones broken shoved into a box-- we all return to water. The smell of blood is dizzying and it bothers Yuri more that she's not so bothered by it.
An uneasy feeling of coldness settles in her gut as she wordlessly makes a beeline for the weapon pile. Soon, she knows, she'll have to join that bloodbath. Kill or be killed.
'Could you kill someone"' Souji had asked her once, and Yuri had shrugged. 'If I think of them as bugs, maybe... Maybe it's better not to think of them as human,' had been about her response. Monsters were one thing. Defeating the spirits that attacked her was another. This? Was something else entirely.
'I suppose I'll see when it comes to it,' she'd tried to say, and Souji had warned her that that way of thinking would get her killed. She wondered if she cared about dying. 'It's just a game,' and yet...
The second her fingers curl around the handle of a sword that's not too unlike the sword she'd been practicing with, everything seems to snap into place and the anxiety grows. Her brow furrows--I don't know if I can do this, she thinks--and glances to Neji--But I have to--and she hurries to avoid a collision with an NPC.]
Are you grabbing something too? [Her voice sounds distant to her own ears, and she watches the NPCs like a hawk-- other players like Neji and herself seem more intent on fleeing immediately, while the NPCs seem more intent on actually trying to kill each other and them.]