[She would have to be blind to not see that this is effecting him, too, or else far less knowledgeable about his nature. The reminder that draws her out of her own distress, though, is when his fists clench, calling her eyes to light on them for a handful of instants.]
[No, this won't do at all. She's been unkind again, as she was before, in Twilight Town. Should have considered how he would look at things, how it would impact him; internally, she berates herself for not having learned so obvious a lesson. Urging her smile more firmly onto her lips, she gathers herself and pushes that self deeper into the back of her mind. The best she can do for him now, she thinks, is not to add any more to the discomfort.]
[Yet such a question he asks of her. There's some part of her that imagines what the others of the Organization would have whispered to her, would have told her to do - she could say yes, and take once more something that isn't hers. Certainly, it's a fond wish of hers that they might one day have such a relationship as that, but she is not the girl she was a year ago and the suggestions Marluxia or Larxene would have made hold no sway over her. She never wanted to do this the easy way; she wanted - wants - to do this the right way.]
Not exactly.
[There's a quietness in her voice, and it's still too heavy for her taste, somewhere in the carefully maintained gentleness. So much explanation lingers unsaid; it would complicate everything, would make it harder for him to work through this, and by now she's learned to avoid that. Some things are better left unsaid. One step at a time, not all at once.]
It was never that simple. But I... would have liked to be.
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[No, this won't do at all. She's been unkind again, as she was before, in Twilight Town. Should have considered how he would look at things, how it would impact him; internally, she berates herself for not having learned so obvious a lesson. Urging her smile more firmly onto her lips, she gathers herself and pushes that self deeper into the back of her mind. The best she can do for him now, she thinks, is not to add any more to the discomfort.]
[Yet such a question he asks of her. There's some part of her that imagines what the others of the Organization would have whispered to her, would have told her to do - she could say yes, and take once more something that isn't hers. Certainly, it's a fond wish of hers that they might one day have such a relationship as that, but she is not the girl she was a year ago and the suggestions Marluxia or Larxene would have made hold no sway over her. She never wanted to do this the easy way; she wanted - wants - to do this the right way.]
Not exactly.
[There's a quietness in her voice, and it's still too heavy for her taste, somewhere in the carefully maintained gentleness. So much explanation lingers unsaid; it would complicate everything, would make it harder for him to work through this, and by now she's learned to avoid that. Some things are better left unsaid. One step at a time, not all at once.]
It was never that simple. But I... would have liked to be.