[ Yu whispers his name, an echo of the way he said it in the park that day, when he told Yosuke the truth. He keeps holding Yosuke's wrist with one hand, but his other comes up too, gently gripping that same arm. Yu cradles Yosuke's arm in both hands and holds him close like a man afraid of drowning.
I can't take it when you look at me like that.
It's like a lance through his heart, more keenly felt because all he is right now is feeling.
Yosuke keeps talking, and he digs his nails into Yu's cheek. Yu winces slightly, his lips parting in a silent exhalation of pain, but he doesn't try to lower Yosuke's hand. He keeps it, lets it stay, right where it is. ]
Why do you think I thought about it?
[ He does smile now, but it's a small, canny thing. ]
I knew you'd suffer if I told you. But I'd be a liar if I didn't. Above all I was scared to death you'd reject me. Your best friend who's into guys... gross, right? Does that make you gross, too, Yosuke? If you wanted it.
[ Yu's expression has blanked out again now.
I fucking wanted to.
A thrill is running through him, his pulse trilling in his wrists and his throat. I fucking wanted to. It should gross me out, but it doesn't.
It doesn't. ]
We're both pathetic, [ Yu murmurs with a laugh, something that makes his shoulders jump while he shuts his eyes and curls his fingers more tightly around Yosuke's arm. ] Who gets this obsessed with their best friend? How sad were our lives that we clung to the first person who cared about us and haven't let go since?
[ Now Yu finally pulls Yosuke's hand down, instead holding it in both of his own close to his chest. ]
You know, it hurt when you said you weren't like that. You act like it's okay for me to like guys, but when it seems like the same could be true of you, you panic. Because it's wrong to be like that, if it's you, isn't it? Hypocrite.
[ There isn't any real force in his voice. It's just a statement, flat, but in truth, the Shadow looks a little .. afraid. ]
no subject
[ Yu whispers his name, an echo of the way he said it in the park that day, when he told Yosuke the truth. He keeps holding Yosuke's wrist with one hand, but his other comes up too, gently gripping that same arm. Yu cradles Yosuke's arm in both hands and holds him close like a man afraid of drowning.
I can't take it when you look at me like that.
It's like a lance through his heart, more keenly felt because all he is right now is feeling.
Yosuke keeps talking, and he digs his nails into Yu's cheek. Yu winces slightly, his lips parting in a silent exhalation of pain, but he doesn't try to lower Yosuke's hand. He keeps it, lets it stay, right where it is. ]
Why do you think I thought about it?
[ He does smile now, but it's a small, canny thing. ]
I knew you'd suffer if I told you. But I'd be a liar if I didn't. Above all I was scared to death you'd reject me. Your best friend who's into guys... gross, right? Does that make you gross, too, Yosuke? If you wanted it.
[ Yu's expression has blanked out again now.
I fucking wanted to.
A thrill is running through him, his pulse trilling in his wrists and his throat. I fucking wanted to. It should gross me out, but it doesn't.
It doesn't. ]
We're both pathetic, [ Yu murmurs with a laugh, something that makes his shoulders jump while he shuts his eyes and curls his fingers more tightly around Yosuke's arm. ] Who gets this obsessed with their best friend? How sad were our lives that we clung to the first person who cared about us and haven't let go since?
[ Now Yu finally pulls Yosuke's hand down, instead holding it in both of his own close to his chest. ]
You know, it hurt when you said you weren't like that. You act like it's okay for me to like guys, but when it seems like the same could be true of you, you panic. Because it's wrong to be like that, if it's you, isn't it? Hypocrite.
[ There isn't any real force in his voice. It's just a statement, flat, but in truth, the Shadow looks a little .. afraid. ]