Torment you? Hahaha! No. I had no idea you worked here until just now. But you know...

[ He makes an exaggerated show of looking first to one side and then the other, before leaning in and speaking in a stage whisper behind his hand. ]

If you're into that sort of thing, I recommend Madam Helga's House of Spanking. You'll get a discount if you mention my name. It's clean and very safe, by which I mean, the fire department will come and rescue you, if the good Madam puts you into a situation from which you can't be otherwise extricated.