wish we could turn back time to the good old days [ CLOSED ]

[cryptologic]

Who: Dipper & various hospital visitors, fellow jungle boogiers, and probably some sailor senshi
When: IC 4/7 and onwards
Where: The hospital, maybe other various locations
What: After his fun jungle adventure sends him to the hospital, Dipper has visitors to see him, apologies to make, and a new place to crash for a few days.
Rating/Warning: Mentions of death and gore



[ It's only after two and a half days of solid sleep in the hospital that Dipper finally wakes up, a throbbing haze lingering on his mind as the heavy memory of why he was here settles upon him. In the jungle, he'd been the last one lured by the hallucinations in the trees to a monster lying in wait. He'd been the first to fall in the ensuing fight. And it wasn't even the monster that got him. Wasn't that ironic?

Everything had fallen apart because of him, and of the injured, he was the only one who wasn't hurt by the monster. Go figure.

It takes Dipper several hours and an essential conversation with Yu before he's really ready to see anyone else. He's exhausted, mentally and physically, but he sets aside the gnawing desire for more sleep in favor of what he knows he has to do. He has to apologize, and for those visitors who weren't on the ill-fated jungle expedition, he needs to be okay. Or try to be, anyway. No one else needs to worry about him. No one else needs these circumstances to weigh on their mind. He created this, so he'd take on as much of it as he can.

Visitors will find him with his right arm in a sling, bandages just peeking out of the collar of his hospital gown. His trademark hat sits next to him on the nightstand, and beneath it lies the journal. Reflexively, he wants to tuck it away and hide its knowledge, but what was the point? What good was it doing him here? When he'd needed it most, it had been completely useless. So he leaves it set aside.

After a few days in the hospital, Dipper is finally dispatched. Before he goes anywhere else, however, he pulls out his CereVice. To the members of expedition team he hadn't seen at the hospital - Dipper couldn't blame them at all for not coming to see him - he sends our a short message that for all its simplicity takes him several minutes to send. ]

I need to talk to you in person.

[ And that's it. ]

Comments

[72hr]

[It's been a few days since he awoke back in Cerealia, and Link has kept to himself. Aside from meeting Minato when he returned and speaking to Yu and Yosuke, Link hasn't tried to talk to anyone else who'd gone to the jungle with them. The thought is just so shameful. Embarrassing. He knows he's messed up, in more ways than one, and he can't stand the undeserved outpouring of sympathy just because he's the one who died. "Got himself killed" is more apt.

But when he receives Dipper's message, it actually gives him pause. Dipper? Link liked him, had felt like they could relate, and maybe that Link could have a friend after a long time of having nobody. But they didn't exactly know each other well, and after this...

It's a while before he sends a message back.]

Heard you're doing better. I'm really sorry I haven't visited.

[cryptologic]

[ Link's sorry he hasn't visited. It's almost funny, except for the part where it's everything is completely horrible. ]

It's okay. Really. Can I meet you somewhere? If you're up for it.

[ Minato had seemed after dying and Dipper had been reassured that's how it was for everyone, but still. That was only physically. ]

[72hr]

Sure. There's a cafe I like to stop at for milk, if you want to meet there. I could use a glass.

[A huge, cold glass, and then another one. Maybe he'll pass out in his seat like ol' Ingo, trying to drown his problems.

He texts Dipper the location and gets dressed. Fifteen minutes later, he's sitting at a table in the cafe with a large milk in front of him. The employees didn't give him a weird look today when he asked for straight milk instead of coffee - maybe they're getting used to him as a new weird but harmless customer, or maybe they sensed his low mood. Either way, they're sure to have noticed that he isn't carrying his sword and shield today.

Link looks up every time the door opens, and when he finally sees Dipper, he waves his hand to get his attention.]

[cryptologic]

Okay, sure. I'll meet you there.

[ Even if the location is a little unexpected. Link's a big milk drinker, huh? Everybody's got their thing...

Dipper heads there shortly after sending his response, and sees Link waving him over as soon as he walks through the door. His stomach turns just at the sight of him - just like Minato, Link looked perfectly fine. Like nothing had happened. Like he hadn't died.

And here comes Dipper, arm in a sling and eyes looking like he hasn't slept in days. Which is ironic, considering all of the sleeping he has been doing. ]

...Hey. [ He drops into a seat, eyes still on Link. He's never going to get used to this whole resurrection thing. ] Thanks for meeting me.

[72hr]

[Link's eyes are glued to the sling as Dipper walks over. He doesn't immediately remember what happened - he was face down in the dirt and writhing in pain through most of the group's fight against that monster. But his mind lands on a similar train of thought as Dipper's: if he's injured, that means he didn't die. Otherwise he would be perfectly okay, just like Minato or himself.]

It's fine. [If anything, Dipper shouldn't have walked here to see him, not in his condition. Link would have happily offered to come directly to him had he remembered about his injury...]

Um, want a drink? It's on me. They do something weird to the milk here, but it's still good.

[cryptologic]

[ "Fine" is about the opposite of what everything is, but that goes without saying so Dipper doesn't point it out.

Much like with Minato before, Dipper continues to stare at Link, like if he does so for long enough, the other boy might start to show signs of the wear and tear that he should be showing. ]

Oh, uh - no thanks, that's okay. I'm...not thirsty. [ This isn't true, strictly speaking, but he has a nervous drinking habit. ]

[72hr]

Ah... alright.

[An awkward silence descends on the table. Link looks away from Dipper and suddenly feels a little uncomfortable.

What to say? If he apologizes for messing up so bad, Dipper will probably just insist that he did nothing wrong. And Link's heard so much of that already, it's driving him crazy. He knows he shouldn't get a pass just because he happened to die instead of somebody else.

So instead, he'll pass the buck to you, Dipper.]

...It wasn't your fault.

[cryptologic]

[ Much like Link, Dipper is tired of hearing this very thing. His reaction is almost rote at this point. Everyone was so insistent that it wasn't Dipper's fault that it made it feel more like it was. Why were they going so far out of their ways to make him feel better unless it was at least a little bit true? ]

Everyone keeps saying that. [ As uncomfortable as it is, he forces himself to meet Link's eyes. ] But it is my fault. If I hadn't wandered away from the group and found that monster, no one would have gotten hurt by it. [ A beat. ] No one would have gotten killed by it.

[72hr]

[When their eyes meet, Link's expression hardens slightly.]

When I was little... Me and a friend got mixed up in something that was way over our heads. Something bad was going to happen and we tried to fix it ourselves. But we didn't fully understand how serious it all was. We were just kids... and I spent the next eight years or so fixing the huge mess we made, blaming myself the entire time.

[But he can't look Dipper in the eye anymore, so he looks down at the still surface of his milk.]

It took me a long time to understand that causation and blame are two different things. You ran off because you were hallucinating, right? That isn't your fault. That's why people keep saying telling you that - it's true.

[cryptologic]

[ Yu had told him the same thing. As much as Dipper might've wanted to believe that following the hallucinations didn't put him at least somewhat at fault, he just can't convince himself. ]

But I made a choice to follow them. I knew how they had tricked others, but I ignored what I knew, and...followed them anyway.

[ Stupid. So stupid. He should have just let himself think. ]

[72hr]

You didn't make that choice, though. You're blaming yourself for something that was done to you. I don't blame you. But even if I did... I forgive you, Dipper.

[But he sighs, because he knows there's no need to go on. Link isn't frustrated with Dipper - he knows exactly what he's going through, understands exactly how he feels. And he knows that if the feeling of responsibility is strong enough, there's nothing he can say to make him feel better. He'd lived it himself, and he'd learned to forgive himself at his own pace.

Dipper is a good kid, but Link gets the feeling he lacks the insight that comes with experience in this stuff. Which is understandable, if that's true... not everyone is some weird, stuck out of time pseudo-teenager like Link is. Link, after all, is the person who should have known better. He mentally kicks himself at the thought.]

Do you do this sort of stuff a lot? [quickly adds:] Er, venturing out and putting yourself in danger on purpose, I mean.

[cryptologic]

[ It's still not right. He should have known better. The forgiveness just makes him feel worse. It had been his fault - why was that so hard for everyone to see?

Fidgeting in his seat, Dipper resists to urge to ask for a glass of water and focuses on Link's question instead. If he's not going to convince the other boy of his blame, then he's more than happy to steer the conversation in another direction. ]

I'm a mystery hunter. Believe it or not, I've actually faced a lot of monsters before.

[ Though, perhaps, none quite as monstrous as that one had been. ]

[72hr]

Mystery hunter?

[Link glances back at him now, not expecting an answer like that at all. His question was intended to be rhetorical; a lead into more lecturing and reassuring. But he does do this a lot? Link had... absolutely no idea. He'd always assumed Dipper is just a normal kid.

The answer having thrown him off, his eyes linger, the pause giving away his underestimation of the other boy.]

Mysteries with... monsters? You fight monsters?

[cryptologic]

[ ...Yeah, he's sort of getting used to this reaction, but that doesn't mean it still doesn't sting a little. Though after what had happened in the jungle, who could blame any of them for assuming Dipper was just some normal, incompetent kid?

He hides his frustration in a short sigh. ]

I know that might seem pretty hard to believe right now, but, yeah, I do. Or, I did, I guess.

[ Before it turned out here was apparently terrible at it here. ]

[72hr]

[Well, it's not really the jungle's events that made it surprising news. Dipper simply doesn't look the part. Doesn't he carry any kind of weapon? How can a person fight monsters without a shield, at least? Not to mention that it had never come up between them before.

But if that's the case... well, the guilt is starting to make a little more sense.]

...No, no. [His expression softening, Link shakes his head.] Actually, that makes more sense now. These things...

[he tries to pick his words carefully.]

...They sting more when you know you know better. Right?

[cryptologic]

[ After considering Link's words for a moment, Dipper nods slowly. ]

Yeah. It really, really does.

[ He'd never run into a monster that he couldn't at least help dispatch. But this one? He could barely do anything. All he could do what knock out a few of its minions. ]