[closed]

[covenantal]

Who: Yu Narukami (covenantal) and a bunch of people who are coming to visit him in the hospital and also after.
When: OOC: wheneva, this is forward-dated anyway ; IC: 4/7 - 4/8 or 4/9 or so
Where: The hospital, and then probably Yu and Yosuke's apartment.
What: After this fiasco, Yu winds up in the hospital from blood loss. While recovering, he has a few friendly visitors, one not-so-friendly visitor, and a lot of important conversations.
Rating/Warning: S for Sad.

---

[ at the hospital ]

[ It takes a solid day for Yu to wake up.

Blood loss ravages a body pretty badly. When he does finally come to, he's disoriented and dizzy and badly fatigued. The wound that lost him all that blood is no less troublesome, wrapped up now in swathes of bandages hidden beneath the hospital gown he's been put in. Even on the 7th, he spends a lot of time dozing.

But he does try to stay awake as much as he can. There's a lot to think about. All of his failures. The deaths. The injuries. What he could have done right. And what he failed to do. The losses of Link and Minato are shackled to his heart, twin albatrosses that bear him forcefully down. He knows he needs to face this - what he's done.

So he'll stir himself for visitors. Or you can stir him, if you like. Or just ask Yosuke - who won't be leaving his partner's side for love or money, pretty much. ]

[ at the apartment ]

[ His own healing spells, and an assist from Korra, let Yu get out of the hospital much earlier than he otherwise would have been able to depart. And once he's able, he practically flees. Like Yosuke, he almost desperately wants time alone to decompress.

Not that he'll hide from the world, either. He'll keep forcing himself, keep pushing, if that's what it takes to make amends. He's still drawn and tired and a little woozy on his feet, but significantly better than he was the day prior. Anyone who seeks him out here will at least have a much better chance of finding him awake - and also of getting the chance to speak to him alone. ]

Comments

hospital; forward tagging to IC 4/7ish~ - sorry for the tl;dr orz

[belfire]

[Kazuya actually found Yu by pure accident.

He'd been hunting for the guy ever since the Jungle Investigation Team came back without Minato. He'd heard how they practically crawled back in, heavily injured and the like, with mentions of things like "death", and Kazuya had just Known. Minato hadn't turned up back at the apartment. He hadn't sent them a text. He hadn't been at the hospital.

It was pretty clear what had happened.

So Kazuya sent the supposed leader of the expedition a polite text about it. Or, who he presumed it to be - honestly, he wasn't sure he had the right guy, but he had to know. But no reply came for his text, so he sent more, more and more, with increasing fury embedded in the words, until he decided to launch a full scale search for the bastard.

A search that ended rather quickly, really. Yu was not at his apartment. So Kazuya checked to see if he was one of the dying (injured) at the hospital - he was. Looking like he'd been shoved through a meat grinder at that. Good. If he had escaped unscathed, Kazuya was fairly certain he would've torn his face off with his fingernails alone. Right now was... the very thin line between himself and Bel was very blurred, and the thought that Minato, dying, like Ket, in that stupid jungle, because of this stranger, was... was...!

...

...in any case. He found him. Dozing in his hospital bed. Kazuya didn't immediately wake him, opting to stare silently for a long, heavy moment, with Bel's quiet, disturbing murmurings of "crush his windpipe right now", and "smother him with a pillow, it'll look natural", slithering through his brain. Kazuya ignored it - furious he may be, but he wasn't going to descend to committing murder out of impulsive revenge. And yet...

Kazuya reached out, slowly, his hand hovering-

-Only to jab Yu hard in the ribs]

You. Wake up.

[covenantal]

[ Well. The jab has the intended effect of waking him up, at least. He hasn't been sleeping well anyway, so he's easy to rouse as it is. Pain lances through his whole frame from that jab and he wakes up choking, curling instinctively and lifting a hand as if to ward off some unseen attacker. Sorry, Kaz, he's pretty disoriented. It takes him a bleary moment or two to get his bearings, his breathing a bit pained, but soon enough he uncurls again and relaxes, leaning back against his pillows. The hospital bed is tilted, keeping him upright enough to talk, and Yu watches Kaz with serious eyes.

It occurs to him to wonder where Yosuke is, though. Heh. The one moment his friend steps away for a small thing, probably, is the moment someone unhappy with him turns up. It'd figure, right? ]

I'm up. What did you want to talk about?

[belfire]

[Kazuya watched the display silently, letting his hand hover in the space between them. There was... a momentary twinge of guilt at Yu's show of pain, but he stubbornly ignored it. He wasn't going to be swayed. He was going to get answers, he was going to do it calmly, he was not going to devolve into pettiness or vindication, but he wasn't going to let pity make him hesitate either. Firm yet merciful. Yes. That's the approach he'll take. He'll remain nice and calm... nice and calm...

He took another deep breath]

Minato. [His voice was... quiet] He went on your expedition. He hasn't come back. I have also heard some disturbing rumours that suggest he is dead. Where is he.

[covenantal]

[ His eyes hood with something like grief. To his credit, though, he doesn't look away. ]

What you heard was correct. He died saving our lives.

[ He can't help the way his gaze moves to Dipper, across the ward, asleep himself, before he looks at Kaz again. ]

I'm sorry.

[belfire]

[Kazuya didn't outwardly react, with the exception of his eyes briefly flickering a deep red. He took another deep breath, and went through the mental steps of how to make a paper aeroplane. First, you fold the paper in half...]

Okay.

[Then, you fold the corners over...]

How did he...

[...no. Wait. He didn't want to know.

...

Yet, he did want to know. He wanted to know what sort of extreme situation would push another of his friends into an awful choice like that - why did they keep doing this? Why did they keep flinging themselves into death like heroes? It was... urgh, it shouldn't happen! Each time he wasn't there, and things like this happen, when he became a demon to prevent this exact thing...!]

How did he die. Tell me.

[covenantal]

[ Now is when Yu looks away, eyes narrowing as he remembers. He rubs a hand over his mouth, shifting in bed. Finally, he shuts his eyes, looking drawn and gray and older than he actually is. ]

We were on our way home when we ran into trouble. An incredibly strong monster found us. One member of our party was badly hurt during the fight...

[ Yu opens his eyes again, but does not look at Dipper. He's glad his friend is asleep. ]

I tried to help him, but I wasn't fast enough. Both of us were left vulnerable. Arisato-san... did something incredible.

[ He's still not sure exactly what happened. It all had gone down so quickly. A barrier - had he cast a Tetrakarn? Yu hadn't had time to look over, but... he could have sworn he hadn't seen Minato use his Evoker. But wasn't that - how could that have been? In the end, it hadn't really mattered either way. ]

He shielded us. But in doing so, he drew the monster's attention. It...

[ He falters. He's so rarely lost for words, but he actually looks a little ill at the memory. The sprays of blood, Minato's cries of pain, the grotesque snaps of his bones... Yu's expression contorts before he passes a hand over his face. His voice is very quiet and shakes just a little when he continues. ]

It devoured him.

[belfire]

[It devoured him]

It.

[It devoured him.]

I see.

[Kazuya - felt nothing. It was a peculiar sensation. It was Bel, a detached part of him said, and it was true, because he could feel the demon practically crushed to the full corners of his skull, dampening everything down into a manageable calm that would've been distressing if he was capable of it. Instead he clasped his hands together, very tightly, and stared at his fingers.

It devoured him.

Well, alright. No body to look at then. No body to carry back. Okay. That was fine. Nothing to look at like with Ket - not that he would've asked to see the corpse anyway, that'd be weird. Did it eat him alive or dead? Alive, probably. If the monster functioned like a demon, the fear would've been an delicious spice atop of the meat. Okay. Hopefully it would have been quick. If it went head down, then.

"One snap of the jaws, and the human wouldn't have felt a thing. Don't fret so, Abel."]

Thank you for telling me. [He was barely aware that he was even talking] To be honest, I should have expected this. Minny did jinx it after all, before he left. Hah...

[He dropped his hands and looked at Yu - his expression was carefully blank, but there was an intensity to his gaze that made it seem as if he was attempting to dissect him with his eyes alone. He was still... deciding. Was it his fault? If this guy had been stronger, then Minato wouldn't have felt obligated to get involved. They could have survived the monster. They could have. They could have. They could have.

But no, that was a dangerous road to tumble down. Kazuya knew better - should know better]

I'll try not to blame you. [He'll try, because he should know better] But right now... Minny should come back at some point- no, he will come back, and he might not remember it, hopefully. But... I don't want you encouraging him to do dangerous stuff like that again. I'll be very unhappy if you do.

[covenantal]

[ A moment passes before Yu tries to respond. He needs it in order to calm down. He shuts his eyes again, breathing, saying nothing, and when his eyes reopen, his expression is composed. Somehow, though, he still looks ill. But it's a different kind of illness, this time, something separate from his physical troubles. Guilt rides his shoulders, bowing them, and it changes the shape of his eyes into something hard and sad.

Minny. They must be close, this boy and Minato. Yu feels sick. If not for him... ]

You should blame me.

[ He's quiet, but steady, and after a moment, he meets Kazuya's gaze. ]

It was my decision to return to the jungle, and I was the leader of the group. If not for my mistakes, no one would have died or gotten hurt. The responsibility for everything that happened is mine. [ A beat, and he sighs out. ] I don't plan to go back out there anytime soon. If I do, it will be with a much smaller group. [ Another, shorter beat. ] One that likely won't include Arisato-san. I don't want him risking himself again anymore than you do.

[belfire]

...

[Yu is obviously suffering.

"Good."

Kazuya turned slightly, and he pulled the chair beside Yu's bed a little closer. He sat down on it, and rested his hands on the edge of his bed, fingers linked together once more - his expression had... not quite softened, but it was no longer eerily blank or controlled. His mouth was pressed into a thin line, and his expression in general was tight, like he'd swallowed something unpleasantly foul and sour]

You're right. You decided to go to the jungle, and you were the leader. But, you know, everyone else decided to go too, including Minny.

["What are you doing?"

Indeed, what was he doing? Kazuya wasn't quite sure. His emotions were all complicated and weird, even with Bel compressing them down to achieve a sense of calmness. He blamed Yu, but he didn't want to, and he sympathised with his position, as much as he hated him for his fatal mistakes. It was strange. He hated him, but pitied him, and... Kazuya wasn't really cut out for intentional cruelty]

We all knew how dangerous the jungle was, but they decided to go anyway. I mean, yeah, you messed up big time, but the sole responsibility isn't yours. [He paused and looked at his hands, digging his nails right into the skin until it hurt] It's Minny's, everyone else in the group, mine for not stopping him...

["Your heart is far too soft, Abel."]

Ah, it doesn't matter, I guess, who's fault it is. It happened. End of. The more important thing is making sure that it isn't repeated. So, make sure you learn from this, yeah? I mean, that's what separates a bad leader from a good one, after all, and you don't strike me as a bad, stupid leader.

[There was definitely a hint of hardness in his voice there, as if to say "you better not be a bad, dumb leader who repeats his mistakes", but otherwise... that was it. It seemed Kazuya had leapt over the initial ragewall that he'd been pressed up against when storming into this room. Yu was... repentant. He understood what he had done. He felt guilty. He looked like he'd been chewed up and spat out again. All of these softened that rage until it was just... dull. He couldn't kick a man while he was down, not one who knew when he's screwed up so horrifically that he was most likely traumatised for life. After all, Kazuya had been in his shoes not too long ago...]

[covenantal]

[ Yu listens quietly, watching Kazuya move and talk without comment, expression as inscrutable as those odd gray eyes of his. It doesn't escape him that Kazuya had come in here possibly gunning for a fight, if the way the boy had chosen to wake him up was any indication, but by now that particular fire has been extinguished. Whatever is going on in his head ... Yu can't possibly know. They're strangers to each other, their only connection a dead friend they're both mourning and whose return they're anxiously awaiting. But he can't help but quietly appreciate what an effort it must be for this boy to be fair to him right now. To do anything other than punch him in the face for getting his good friend so senselessly slaughtered out there in the wilds.

Minato has good friends, he thinks. Yu will be glad to leave him to the care of people like this.

Some of the hardness goes out of Yu's own expression by the time Kazuya is done speaking. In the end, he just looks unspeakably exhausted. Part of that is the blood loss itself. And part of that is the grief and the guilt of the deaths of his friends, of holding Dipper in his arms and watching Yang go down realizing, above all, that he'd failed a group of people that had placed their faith in him.

He failed them. ]

Thank you.

[ Quietly, still. His voice is a little rough, and he pauses before he speaks again, gathering himself. He's steadier when he speaks again. ]

I won't let this happen again.

[ He says so little, but there's a certain quality to his tone, a heavy ring of finality, that sounds like an oath. ]

[belfire]

Good.

[Very good. A spark of grim satisfaction broke through the dullness, and Kazuya smoothed his hands out along the blanket, muttering the word again under his breath. It wasn't quite closure, but the knowledge that the person who held some of the responsibility for Minny's death had been dealt with, and understood the weight of his guilt, went a long way in soothing any ruffled feathers.

Now, he just had to wait for Minny to come back, where he could suplex him into the toilet as punishment for doing something so stupid]

This went a bit differently than I imagined. I'm kinda glad. I didn't really want to get nasty. [Beat] Well then. [He rose up from his chair, but didn't immediately move off. He stared at Yu a little bit more, debating...] You know, next time you go out, bring me along. I promise I'll reduce the risk of death by ten thousand per cent.

[The corners of his mouth tilted up - not quite a smile, for the slight show of sharp canines made the gesture borderline threatening - and that flicker of red once more flashed over his eyes, the sunlight drifting through the window suddenly dim and muted]

In fact, I insist. There's a monster out there that I need to return a favour to, after all.

[Kazuya didn't really condone revenge, but in this case, he decided it would be okay. It was a monster, after all. Those things needed to be killed on principle alone. Bel approved as well. It was definitely okay. They'll find it... it wasn't petty revenge... it was "a dangerous beast in need of destruction. Yes. That's right. It needs to be killed, Abel."

So, next time Yu decides to go out, Kazuya will go. For protection. And if they encounter that monster again, he'd make sure that he'd eradicate every... atom... of... it...]

Anyway! [Flip! The ominous aura vanished, and Kazuya actually smiled properly, though it seemed a bit stiff around the edges. The abrupt change in personality was most likely disturbing and disorientating] I best leave you to recover, eh? Hope you have a nice rest, Yu-Yu!

[covenantal]

[ The way Yu's eyes widen slightly is the only indication he gives of shock at the sudden aura of menace rolling off Kazuya in waves. There's that flash of red eyes again... he hadn't missed that the first time. Just who, or what, is this person? Again, Yu just regards him in silence for a long moment, not really sure what to make of him.

This person ... could be a frightening enemy to have. Had things "went a bit differently," would he have been willing to do something quite a bit worse than simply have a tense discussion?

The change in attitude produces no further reaction from him than a blink. Yu doesn't smile in return, either. Instead, he tilts his head slightly, considering. ]

You never told me your name.

[belfire]

Oh, that's right.

[Kazuya paused mid-step, having already turned to leave (towards the window, weirdly enough), and looked back at Yu. He lifted his hand up in a near-imitation of a Magical Girl pose, winking one eye shut. Silly, maybe, but sometimes when you're upset and stressed, falling back into Midori-isms was enough to get you to the end of a bad situation]

I'm Kazuya Minegishi, better known as... Kaz!

["The Messiah!" did not leave his lips, despite the impulsive urge to shout it. He detested that title, so why would he... never mind. He eased out of his ridiculous pose, and turned away again]

But call me whatever you like, Yu-Yu. I don't mind.

[covenantal]

[ Yu's brows draw together over what is, for the first time, the faintest shadow of a smile. He won't say anything after that, and Kaz may think he's free to go.

Just before he departs, however, he'll hear Yu speak again. If he turns to look, he'll see that Yu is leaning back against his pillows with his eyes shut. ]

The monster.

[ A beat. ]

It's taken care of. I made sure of that myself.

[belfire]

[Kazuya had just opened the window and was preparing to slip out of it when he heard Yu speak, and for a long moment, he didn't move. Well.

"Well."]

I see. That's fine.

[He felt... dissatisfaction. Bel felt dissatisfied. But, well, never mind. The monster is dead at the very least, and no one else can fall prey to it. Silently, he hauled himself up onto the windowsill, peering down at the street below for a few short seconds]

Take me along next time anyway. You never know with Cerealia, there could be more lurking out there. [A glance over his shoulder, a grin that showed far too much teeth;] See ya around, Yu-Yu.

[With that, he slipped off the windowsill and vanished from view. Get well soon, Yu-Yu!]

For Dipper

[covenantal]

[ He's been awake for a few hours - and dealing with visitors of ... various dispositions - when Dipper starts to come to. Yu watches him with concern from across the ward, but won't do much right away. There's not much he can do, really, in bed as he is, with Yosuke at his side keeping an eye on him. (Especially once he told Yosuke the story about Kaz.) He decides to just let the hospital staff tend to Dipper and give his friend space for a while, but he knows they need to talk.

It only takes him an hour or two of Dipper looking restless and unhappy for him to decide this talk needs to happen sooner rather than later. With a quiet word to Yosuke, he wins permission, albeit grudging, to talk to Dipper alone. Getting out of bed is no small feat (and requires some help), but eventually he's able to make his way over to Dipper's bedside, leaning on his IV pole as he goes before taking a seat in the chair beside Dipper's bed. His smile is very tired, but he tries. ]

Hey. Good to see you're up.

For Yosuke

[covenantal]

[ By the time he and Yosuke manage to leave the hospital together on the 8th, Yu can't get out of that place fast enough. As much as he's committed to seeing through what he's done - and talking to everyone who wants to approach him, for however long they need to speak to him - the place was starting to feel claustrophobic. And no matter how good his intentions, he's beginning to feel overwhelmed. With Korra's help, and enough of his own energy returned to spare a healing spell on himself, he's well enough to go home far earlier than should probably be allowed. Which is to say, he's still hurt, weak, and woozy on his feet, but well enough to return to the apartment he and Yosuke share.

He was, in fact, rather insistent on the matter.

It's not like him to avoid people. And he won't refuse any visitors that come by. He won't refuse anyone who seeks him out. But something about the solace of the apartment, even the illusion that he can be alone with his best friend, soothes him slightly.

Still...

Still.

At some point late in the afternoon, Yosuke may notice something is very amiss. Honestly, he probably has seen it all along. In the stiff set of Yu's shoulders, in the way he just kept refusing to relax or let his guard down at all, even for a second. In the constant tightness around his eyes. In the way he just hasn't smiled at all, except when others needed him to. But at this specific point, he stops in the middle of their sparse living room. Just stops, standing there for no real reason, staring down at his hands.

He's thinking, you see. About the sound Minato's bones made as they were snapping.

For the first time, Yu has to press a hand over his mouth, fighting down the urge to physically retch. ]

here we gooooooooo

[cryptologic]

[ The merciful haze of a long sleep doesn't linger long enough on Dipper's consciousness once he comes to in the hospital. His senses sharpen all too quickly, a mind numb from pain and exhaustion and medicine jumpstarting with a logjam of thoughts that needed to be processed. They run over him like waves, and as he tries to sit upright, his right arm is met with painful, stiff protests from his shoulder.

His skin prickles as he reaches inside the collar of his hospital gown with his left hand, tracing the neatly tied bandages gingerly with his fingers. And like bright lights in a storm, it starts to come back to him. The hallucinations. The monster. The fight. The death.

Not his, but it should have been.

Dipper remains uncharacteristically still, aside from his tossing and turning, as he presses against the coils of guilt and failure that threaten to suffocate him. He knew Yu would come over to talk to him eventually, and Dipper had nowhere to go, nowhere to hide. For as small as he already felt, if he had a magic crystal to shrink even smaller and disappear, he would have used it in a heartbeat.

He glances up towards Yu when he shuffles over, but he only makes it to the IV Yu is leaning on before Dipper's eyes drop back to his hands - one resting in a sling, the other anxiously pulling on the threads of a blanket. He can't meet Yu's eyes.

After all, Yu was only in the hospital because of Dipper's mistakes. He shouldn't even be here; his close presence brings that reminder. Why couldn't Yu just leave him alone?

A long moment passes before Dipper answers in a voice that is both heavy and soft. ]

...I figured I might've been overdoing it on sleeping in. [ It's a poor attempt at humor, but saying anything else feels too threatening. ]

we're not ready

[covenantal]

You need the rest. [ His voice is gentle. ] We all do.

[ For obvious reasons.

His eyes search Dipper's face, especially as his friend won't meet his eyes. He knows why. Thinks he can guess that Dipper probably doesn't want to talk to him right now. All the more reason to have this conversation, then. Dipper needs to hear this. More than anything, Dipper needs to express his feelings, before they turn into nasty snarls of darkness he can't escape from. Yu knows from that darkness. Has seen it too many times to let it pass in someone he cares about. ]

I'm just glad you're alright. [ His voice dips into sad softness, his eyes hooding. ] We're truly in debt to Arisato-san.

[ It's the gentlest yet most direct way he can think of to start broaching the topic. ]

hospital 4/7 yooooo

[zerotohiro]

[Truthfully, hospitals made him uneasy. He's spent a fair amount of time in them growing up just thanks to being an inventor and also being a kid who's too smart for his own good, but it never became a favorite place or anything. He's been to Cerealia's hospital once to visit Terra so he knows his way around enough to wander in and find his way to the room Yu and Dipper are in.

The first day he had come by, both of his friends were still asleep and healing and he only stayed for a short moment to assess them and assure himself they wouldn't necessarily die in the hospital. The second day, the 7th, he comes back and this time he is Prepared. He's Baymax-less right now and he's armor-less, dressed down in his usual shorts and hoodie combination. He doesn't anticipate them being awake still and so his approach is almost cautious and quiet as he pokes his head into the room and spots Yosuke still there.]

Man...did you even leave last night? [It's a light tease but his face is fairly solemn. He knows he wouldn't leave if this were Tadashi or one of his other friends.] Any improvements?

yoha broha ♥

[cpt_ressentiment]

[ Yosuke's been there. Of course he has. He's not leaving unless someone blatantly kicks him out so they can run this, that, or the other test for whatever reason - and even then, he's right back in, refusing to leave his partner's side.

He's actually about to fall asleep in the chair (since he honestly hasn't done a lot of that sleep thing, truth be told), but when he hears Hiro's voice from the door, he looks up, and cracks a small smile, weak as it may be. ]

Heh. Actually? No. Sure didn't. [ He shakes his head, still trying to smile. He appreciates the understanding, as unspoken as it is. ]

Yeah, he's getting better. They said he'd be out soon. Maybe tomorrow, if everything keeps going okay. How about you? How're you holding up?

[ He's been so worried about everyone - literally everyone involved, but especially his friends - that he's not about to let Hiro get away without answering, too. ]

phonetags bc I love ruining your life

[cryptologic]

[ Dipper noticeably flinches at the mention of Minato, both hands - even the one belonging to the injured arm - curling up into fists. The name calls up that memory, unbidden, where so much was a blur aside from the sensations he most wished he could forget. Splintered wood that speared him like a fish, the unholy screeching of the monster, the spray of warm blood, not even his own, but then, there'd been plenty of that too before he blacked out -

It's too much. He doubles over, nausea threatening to overcome him. He presses his hand to his forehead, sliding it over his birthmark and through his hair. ]

It's not - he shouldn't have -

[ It should have been me.

It takes him a few wretched moments to find his voice again, and when he does, it's barely more than a whisper. ]

I'm glad you're alright, too.

[ But it's a hollow phrase. None of them were alright, and it's his fault . ]

I HATE YOU

[covenantal]

Dipper.

[ Yu watches him with an expression of pained sympathy. He doesn't reach out just yet, instead leaning back in his chair. His whole core still aches pretty badly. ]

He made a choice. For our sakes. As painful as it is ... we have to accept his sacrifice.

[ He's quiet for a moment, his expression softening only slightly at Dipper's quiet comment. I'm glad you're alright, too. It does sound hollow, and it prompts what Yu says next, careful but all too knowing. ]

Will you tell me what you're thinking?

you love meeeeee

[cryptologic]

[ That's a silly question. What was he thinking about? About choice and death and consequence, and how ill-prepared he was to deal with any of it.

He still can't meet Yu's gaze. ]

I did this.

I DO NOT, NOT WITH TAGS LIKE THIS

[covenantal]

[ Yu is silent for a long minute, taking a deep breath through his nose and shutting his eyes.

With an effort that requires he lever himself up on his IV pole, he sits straighter and gives Dipper the kind of direct look the other boy probably wants the least right now. ]

Can I ask you something? [ He won't pause before asking the something anyway. ] What made you leave the group?

[ He's certain he already knows. But he wants to hear Dipper confirm it out loud for a reason. ]