The thing about Cerealia is, there really isn't any nature to be found here. Sure, you can go outside the walls of the city and explore the land beyond but who wants to risk a terrible, horrible death just to sniff the flowers? Not you, that's who! CERES understands that, CERES sympathizes, and sometimes CERES decides to take action when such problems arise. As part of the company's current "Healthier and Happier YOU" initiative, they've decided to let everyone get back in touch with nature a little.
Via ViViD.
Of course, this being CERES, the nature they've sent everyone to is more of a swamp. The place is disgusting, a real marvel of ViViD ingenuity and it smells like the dead. There's strange rustling among the leaves from creatures that may or may not want to eat you, and random pits that open up right under your feet with the goal of sending you straight into the marsh. It's not really that fun. There's no welcome sign either, no nothing except for swamplands as far as the eye can see.
Welcome to ViViD!  This is Mosley. One of our programmers forgot to include a welcome greeting for the level this time. How incompetent can you get? He's been fired now, it's fine. Instead, I will greet you today. Lucky you! You've been invited today to participate in CERES's "Healthier and Happier YOU" level where we've combined both physical exercise and relaxing meditation into the ultimate ViViD experience. Isn't that fun? You can... go camping and stuff. Or whatever. I don't... know...
Honestly, I don't even care. Have fun.
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PHASE I [ 6 00 ] Welcome to your new healthy living training ground! What does a swamp have to do with healthy living, you may ask? Absolutely nothing! To make up for it, CERES has outfitted all players with the proper equipment for their new healthy living lifestyle. They also may or may not have let you keep your shoes based on how benevolent the ViViD gods were being at the time. (Not very.)
Oh, and all newcomers will have something additional on their fancy new yoga shirt. It will be displayed loudly and proudly all over the front and back of it. And if you're one of the few not wearing a shirt, it will be on the back of your pants. As in, your butt. It will be on your butt.
What’s ViViD trying to say, anyway?
Regardless, it probably doesn’t matter as much as finding your way through the swamp. Some sort of dry land would be really nice right now, wouldn't it? You'll have to watch out for the mud that will suck you right down under the marsh, and the creatures with lots of teeth that will never surface from the mud but won't hesitate to snap up an unwary foot or two.
CERES is sure you'll be fine. Totally and completely fine.
PHASE II [ 800 ] Eventually, if you try really, really hard, you’ll make it to a house. Actually, it’s more of a shack, really. If you clamber your way out of the mud and the gunk and the marsh into said shack, you will find it to be empty aside from a table. A table hosting a huge pile of... well, health drinks. See, there's totally a health theme in this level. CERES would never make a ViViD level that wasn't thematically appropriate. Never! Health drinks of all sorts and types and sizes can be found here and there’s even a sign too; it simply says:
Take one.
Well, that seems safe.
Unfortunately, you won’t be able to leave said shack until you do take one. And drink it. The door will lock shut and cover itself in more swamp until you do. Yay. Depending on your luck, the drink may do the following to you: ➟ Cause your ViViD experience to glitch. This may involve phasing through walls, seeing everything in 8-bit, or hearing really annoying old video game music everywhere you go.
➟ Cause status effects. This can include suddenly moving incredibly slowly, being turned to stone for a period of time, suddenly being on fire, suddenly being poisoned, etc etc.
➟ Be healthier. Mmm, kale and hummus smoothie. Taste those veggies. If you try to take more than one, that’s fine too, nobody will stop you, but you probably won’t get lucky more than once.
PHASE III [ 900 ] And back you go, out into the swampy wilderness. Don’t give up! Keep going! Eventually, you’ll find the end of this level. Probably.
Eventually, though, you may stumble across something in the mud and the muck. It’s... a little doll?
In fact, it’s a little doll of one of your most important people (or, alternatively, of someone you absolutely hate). It might be someone in Cerealia currently, or someone who isn’t, but either way, the doll is there and it’s clearly them (covered in mud and all). Be careful, though. If you toss it aside, you’ll suddenly see that important person being tossed aside. If you cut the doll, you'll suddenly see that person bleeding. Even if they aren’t present in Cerealia, whatever happens to that doll, you'll see it happening to them. Is it a hallucination or are they actually there? That's a little more up in the air.
And if they are present in Cerealia, well... doing things to that doll might very well hurt them too -- for real, this time, though.
Be careful! Or don't. You do you, as CERES would say.
PHASE IV [ 1200 ] And then, eventually you reach a quiet, swampy area. Not that the rest of the swamp isn't swampy, this area is just extra swampy.
There’s very little happening here in this swampy place; even the birds are no longer squawking. And for a long moment, everything will remain quiet and peaceful, a place of reprieve... until the swamp begins to bubble. Then suddenly, a new friend will burst out of the swamp, showering mud and gunk everywhere.
Without warning, that creature is going to try to grab for the nearest person (it might be you!) and let out a mighty roar when they have them. Then, they'll hold them up to... read the nutrition facts on their shirt? What?
Of course, it will try to gobble you or whoever else it grabs if it finds, say, the salt content to be acceptable (the monster is watching their carbs). If it's not, then they'll just fling you away and move onto the next snack. For those without a handy nutrition facts label on your shirt, well, it might just take a gamble and try to eat you anyway.
Great. A health-conscious monster. That's just what this level needed.
BONUS [ xxxx ] Finally, you’re free of the game. Without warning, you’re dumped into Cerealia properly and you’re able to scrub the mud and gunk from your clothing (wait why did that come back with you and where are your normal clothes?). You're able to then make your way to your new place of residence (or old) and...
There is a tiny tree there waiting for you. Isn’t it cute? And if you take care of this tiny tree, it will eventually bear fruit! Tiny fruit. Itty bitty fruit.
Depending on which tiny tree you get, it will be one of the following: a tiny dildo tree, a tiny bacon tree, a tiny kazoo tree, a tiny carolina reaper tree, or a (dumb) tiny hats tree.
Everything will, naturally, be tiny. Enjoy your new healthy CERES gift!
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
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no subject
how many bitches do you have, yata ]
What a man does with his most hated person is his business, shorty. Didn't your mother teach you that stealing is wrong?
[ The fact that this other boy had referred to Hijikata as a 'her' means that it's likely he's seeing someone else entirely, but Sougo still refuses to let Yata have the doll. He's a brat who hates to lose like that. ]
no subject
he is the bitch. ]
DID YOU JUST— [ YEAH, THIS ASSHOLE DEFINITELY JUST CALLED HIM "SHORTY". now sougo has to deal with this angry chihuahua... what luck.
and yata's going to keep fighting for the doll because that's his king, dammit!!! just give it already, you fake shinsengumi! ] Give it, punk!
no subject
So, he'll give it to him.
But not without making Yata suffer a little first.
As Yata tugs, Sougo walks a little forward, pretending to be having some trouble. ] Ah, no way, I'm losing my grip. You're way too strong for me --
[ He isn't even trying with the acting, given how deadpan he sounds. Subtly, as they continue their tug-of-war, Sougo walks them close to a particularly repulsive puddle of swamp gunk and ... lets go.
Hope you like swamp gunk, Yata???? ]
no subject
[ NO, HE DOES NOT LIKE SWAMP GUNK. jeez... this is absolutely terrible. he can't even wipe his face with his arm because every part of him is literally covered in gunk. this is the worst. why is this yata's life.
despite being dirty as hell, he gets up to his feet and looks at his hand. it's the anna doll!! finally.
and this isn't creepy at all. a grown man holding a doll? nothing weird about that. ]
Heh. I got it, sucker.
[ he may not be the real winner here, but he totally feels like he is. ]
no subject
[ He doesn't know whether to burst Yata's bubble or not. Maybe he'll just let him continue to believe He Had Won. ]
I hear these dolls change into people we know. So, who are you seeing in that thing?
[ And it all sounds like a decent conversation starter until Sougo casually cups a frog in his hand and places it on Yata's head. He arranges some water lily flowers on his head too, so Yata can be the beautiful blossom of the swamp. ]
no subject
yata grits his teeth as he swats the frog and those flowers away from his head. it's so good that he has a beanie on, or else his hair is going to get even more messed up. but that's really the least of his worries.
it's time for serious talk, now that sougo's brought it up. ]
My king. [ he blinks a couple of times before holding the doll closer to his face. it does look like anna. who does this guy see? ] Wait- you mean you were seeing something else?
[ that's what he said, yata. no need to be so slow. ]
no subject
And he's kind of already said that???? Still, Sougo's fine with repeating himself. ]
Yeah. Just some irritating guy ... I'm going to get rid of. [ Said in the most casual way possible. ]
That's some loyalty you have to your king. [ He can sort of relate. ]
no subject
[ man, he feels bad now. he scratches the back of his head, but since there's gunk all over his hair, he just spread it all over his hand, too. everything is great. ]
Gross...
[ a beat. ]
Y- Yeah, I guess! I mean, [ how do you even explain loyalty to someone? it sucks when you're as dumb as yata. ] she's so great and she just wants to protect everyone. So, you know? She deserves all the support she can get.
no subject
It looks like Yata feels very strongly about this king of his, and Sougo is a little curious too. He sits on an nearby rock, keeping his katana on his lap and away from the swamp gunk. ]
You don't look like a knight of any sort. [ Being honest here... ] What sort of 'king' are we talking about here?
no subject
this topic isn't a sensitive topic at all. in fact, yata likes talking about his clan and his king. he has a lot of pride in the people he works with, and it definitely shows when he starts talking. ]
The king of HOMRA, the Red Clan. I guess you're not from Shizume, but that's not important. [ his hands are dirty, but he pulls down the collar of his ugly shirt so sougo can see his tattoo. ] This is the pride of HOMRA. And our king's the leader of it all.
Anna's great! [ why is the name of the king a girl's name. ] She's still young and has a lot to learn, but she's a great king.
[ thumbs up. ]
no subject
The fact that he's calling her a 'king' rather than a 'queen' is a little odd, but maybe 'king' means something else entirely where Yata comes from. He's definitely picking on that the meaning is a little different from the usual use of the term. ]
Has she always been your leader? It sounds like she's new at this.
no subject
Ah, she's actually kinda new. [ he nods. ] But that's okay. She's different from Mr Mikoto, but Anna's a good king on her own.
[ yata would normally feel sad talking about his old king, mikoto, but he's grown up a little to have control over his emotions. ]