The thing about Cerealia is, there really isn't any nature to be found here. Sure, you can go outside the walls of the city and explore the land beyond but who wants to risk a terrible, horrible death just to sniff the flowers? Not you, that's who! CERES understands that, CERES sympathizes, and sometimes CERES decides to take action when such problems arise. As part of the company's current "Healthier and Happier YOU" initiative, they've decided to let everyone get back in touch with nature a little.
Via ViViD.
Of course, this being CERES, the nature they've sent everyone to is more of a swamp. The place is disgusting, a real marvel of ViViD ingenuity and it smells like the dead. There's strange rustling among the leaves from creatures that may or may not want to eat you, and random pits that open up right under your feet with the goal of sending you straight into the marsh. It's not really that fun. There's no welcome sign either, no nothing except for swamplands as far as the eye can see.
Welcome to ViViD!  This is Mosley. One of our programmers forgot to include a welcome greeting for the level this time. How incompetent can you get? He's been fired now, it's fine. Instead, I will greet you today. Lucky you! You've been invited today to participate in CERES's "Healthier and Happier YOU" level where we've combined both physical exercise and relaxing meditation into the ultimate ViViD experience. Isn't that fun? You can... go camping and stuff. Or whatever. I don't... know...
Honestly, I don't even care. Have fun.
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PHASE I [ 6 00 ] Welcome to your new healthy living training ground! What does a swamp have to do with healthy living, you may ask? Absolutely nothing! To make up for it, CERES has outfitted all players with the proper equipment for their new healthy living lifestyle. They also may or may not have let you keep your shoes based on how benevolent the ViViD gods were being at the time. (Not very.)
Oh, and all newcomers will have something additional on their fancy new yoga shirt. It will be displayed loudly and proudly all over the front and back of it. And if you're one of the few not wearing a shirt, it will be on the back of your pants. As in, your butt. It will be on your butt.
What’s ViViD trying to say, anyway?
Regardless, it probably doesn’t matter as much as finding your way through the swamp. Some sort of dry land would be really nice right now, wouldn't it? You'll have to watch out for the mud that will suck you right down under the marsh, and the creatures with lots of teeth that will never surface from the mud but won't hesitate to snap up an unwary foot or two.
CERES is sure you'll be fine. Totally and completely fine.
PHASE II [ 800 ] Eventually, if you try really, really hard, you’ll make it to a house. Actually, it’s more of a shack, really. If you clamber your way out of the mud and the gunk and the marsh into said shack, you will find it to be empty aside from a table. A table hosting a huge pile of... well, health drinks. See, there's totally a health theme in this level. CERES would never make a ViViD level that wasn't thematically appropriate. Never! Health drinks of all sorts and types and sizes can be found here and there’s even a sign too; it simply says:
Take one.
Well, that seems safe.
Unfortunately, you won’t be able to leave said shack until you do take one. And drink it. The door will lock shut and cover itself in more swamp until you do. Yay. Depending on your luck, the drink may do the following to you: ➟ Cause your ViViD experience to glitch. This may involve phasing through walls, seeing everything in 8-bit, or hearing really annoying old video game music everywhere you go.
➟ Cause status effects. This can include suddenly moving incredibly slowly, being turned to stone for a period of time, suddenly being on fire, suddenly being poisoned, etc etc.
➟ Be healthier. Mmm, kale and hummus smoothie. Taste those veggies. If you try to take more than one, that’s fine too, nobody will stop you, but you probably won’t get lucky more than once.
PHASE III [ 900 ] And back you go, out into the swampy wilderness. Don’t give up! Keep going! Eventually, you’ll find the end of this level. Probably.
Eventually, though, you may stumble across something in the mud and the muck. It’s... a little doll?
In fact, it’s a little doll of one of your most important people (or, alternatively, of someone you absolutely hate). It might be someone in Cerealia currently, or someone who isn’t, but either way, the doll is there and it’s clearly them (covered in mud and all). Be careful, though. If you toss it aside, you’ll suddenly see that important person being tossed aside. If you cut the doll, you'll suddenly see that person bleeding. Even if they aren’t present in Cerealia, whatever happens to that doll, you'll see it happening to them. Is it a hallucination or are they actually there? That's a little more up in the air.
And if they are present in Cerealia, well... doing things to that doll might very well hurt them too -- for real, this time, though.
Be careful! Or don't. You do you, as CERES would say.
PHASE IV [ 1200 ] And then, eventually you reach a quiet, swampy area. Not that the rest of the swamp isn't swampy, this area is just extra swampy.
There’s very little happening here in this swampy place; even the birds are no longer squawking. And for a long moment, everything will remain quiet and peaceful, a place of reprieve... until the swamp begins to bubble. Then suddenly, a new friend will burst out of the swamp, showering mud and gunk everywhere.
Without warning, that creature is going to try to grab for the nearest person (it might be you!) and let out a mighty roar when they have them. Then, they'll hold them up to... read the nutrition facts on their shirt? What?
Of course, it will try to gobble you or whoever else it grabs if it finds, say, the salt content to be acceptable (the monster is watching their carbs). If it's not, then they'll just fling you away and move onto the next snack. For those without a handy nutrition facts label on your shirt, well, it might just take a gamble and try to eat you anyway.
Great. A health-conscious monster. That's just what this level needed.
BONUS [ xxxx ] Finally, you’re free of the game. Without warning, you’re dumped into Cerealia properly and you’re able to scrub the mud and gunk from your clothing (wait why did that come back with you and where are your normal clothes?). You're able to then make your way to your new place of residence (or old) and...
There is a tiny tree there waiting for you. Isn’t it cute? And if you take care of this tiny tree, it will eventually bear fruit! Tiny fruit. Itty bitty fruit.
Depending on which tiny tree you get, it will be one of the following: a tiny dildo tree, a tiny bacon tree, a tiny kazoo tree, a tiny carolina reaper tree, or a (dumb) tiny hats tree.
Everything will, naturally, be tiny. Enjoy your new healthy CERES gift!
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
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OTA
[Worst exercise experience ever. Who decided a hike through the swamp was good for the health? Tony is especially peeved because he has to do it on foot, which to him feels like a complete handicap. He has the armor for a reason, CERES! So obviously he takes cover in the shack, just to get out of the muck for a while. He happens to go in along with another person--and he might have hesitated a bit just to make sure they were both safe before entering the shack--but now it seems like they are stuck. And Tony is even more tense.]
No. No, absolutely not. [Him? Drinking dubious liquids? Please.] This level officially loses my vote.
Phase III
[One way or another, he does get out... right back into the swamp. This is not Tony's day. Thankfully the swamp hasn't inflicted too many physical dangers on him, but there's always time for that, right? He's lost in the swamp, looking more annoyed than anything, and has no one around as back up this time. If he can just remember his survival training, he might be able to make it through the level.]
After this, I'm going to take a shower. And stay there for the rest of the week.
Bonus
[On the bright side, he makes it through the level and finally gets back. On the other side, he's still covered in grimy yoga clothes and looks like he's been thrown around the level a few times. What really confuses him when he gets back, though, is the gift that CERES apparently left outside. He's not sure what to do with the tiny tree, so the first thing he does is send out a message over the network:
He's not exactly the best candidate for a caretaker of anything, but it's living and he feels bad not doing something about it.]
Bonus
[Not that Koumei has much experience with gardening himself. He's far better with feeding wild birds than taking care of weird trees growing even weirder peppers.]
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[Or anything that has to do with proper care, really.]
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[It was the blind leading the blind, but perhaps they could help eachother.]
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bonus!
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Is there a place we can do that near the residential area? I mean, I guess I could go visit it.
[This is assuming he doesn't forget.]
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There's a decent-sized park close to my apartment complex that looks like it could use some greenery... Though if I may be honest, you never struck me as the gardening type. Why the sudden interest?
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[Phase II]
She glanced from Tony to the bottles on the table before snorting faintly.]
Zhey cannot be zhat bad. Vat do zhe labels say?
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[He's kind of being petulant. Tony doesn't like being forced into things, and the whole situation makes him uncomfortable because the setup is shifty.]
Would you trust those labels? It's a game, they could say the drinks contain sunshine and magic hugs.
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If it contains sunshine und magic hugs, keep zhem far avay from me. I don't feel like bursting into flames even if zhis IS a simulation.
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phase iii
It's from this vantage point that Yu spots Tony. The man looks familiar, and it takes Yu a moment to place him. That video broadcast... right. Yu, with a silent mental command, will tell Izanagi to slow, and call out. ]
Need a hand?
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It's probably good for him. He's using that as an excuse to make himself feel better.
He pauses the slow march through the swamp when he hears Yu call out, looking up to see him apparently being held by a floating being.]
Well, I'm jealous. Yeah, actually, I kind of do. This is a lot harder than I thought it would be.
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[ Izanagi puts that big, mean-looking sword on his back, and offers his free hand to Tony to help pull him out of the swamp water. ]
Come on. I don't know where the exit is, but I've been making progress a lot faster this way.
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phase ii!!
she's a little surprised to end in the shack with him and just looks between the drink table and tony with raised eyebrows. she gives a snort then and grins like an asshole at him. ]
Seriously? You're scared of a little drink?
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I'm not scared. I just don't think it's a good idea. They could be old.
[He's got his arms crossed and an uneasy look that says he is more concerned than he's admitting. But they are just drinks and he wants to defend his pride.]
There has to be another way out.
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at the suggestion of there being another way out, she looks at the door and then back at tony, shrugging. ]
It's ViViD, right? Do it or die.
[ malia, that's so macabre...! but she just strides right to the table and grabs one of those health drinks and opens it up. taking a sip now and -- ]
Oh god, that tastes like hummus.
[ she's like 90% carnivore leave her alone ]
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bonus!
i think a scarf helps through winters, if you keep them where they might see frost.
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Why didn't anyone tell me that?
[There is so much he needs to know about plant care now!]
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bonus
If it's a gift from CERES, it can't be good.
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It seems like a waste to just leave it.
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Bonus
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[Don't be a tool, Stark. You can do this.]
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III
And the less said about her hair? The better.]
You are not the only one. I'm just glad I have three showers, one for me and both my housemates.
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