Bright lights! An abundance of color! A cacophony of laughter and delighted (?) shrieks! Welcome, everyone, to the carnival! Enough of those nonsense protein shakes and that hoity-toity recycling; it's time to let loose, have some fun, and live a little! No judgment will be allowed today, not when everyone’s dressed up in ridiculous costumes and eating those unnecessarily huge turkey legs (it... is turkey, right?). For you see, CERES has invited the Traveling Circus of Tjghsldiwk (they hail from a different planet, but here's a hint: the h is silent) to bring some joy to the colonists. This is a safe place to let your inner wild child out, really. Definitely safe. Promise.
Yet for those who are a little less easily convinced to follow the sounds of laughter and amusement (bless your sensible hearts), they will find themselves grabbed and forcibly dragged by a pair of friendly souls in matching costumes. Everyone should be able to enjoy the festivities, don’t you think? Can’t have them missing out on all this jolly good, innocent fun!
The Public Announcement System crackles with... well, a fit of coughing first. But then a gravelly voice speaks! It seems the ringmaster has an announcement for you all. What joyous news can he bring?  Listen... I know that we’re supposed to keep these idiots entertained for at least another day or two but the machinery’s starting to complain. I think I heard the gates of the petting zoo groan – they’re on their last legs.
... Wait, this isn’t the direct line
Oh.
Ohohoho!! Have a great time, everyone! Everything is perfectly fine!
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PHASE I [ 11 00 ] Come one, come all!! There’s quite a large amount of people here, isn’t there? You’ll find yourself tugged this way and that – up until you get dragged right into a changing booth. The helpful attendant meets you with a worryingly large grin – how is her face not breaking? – before pushing you right through the curtain. Then you’ll be given your choice of one of these lovely garments to change into. Look, one of them has to match your skintone, right? Don’t be picky about it! You also have... 90 seconds to figure out how to wear it before you’re tossed out into the middle of the crowd again. Have a good festival!
If you’re not willing to put on the outfits though, that’s fine. Instead, they’ll top you off with a cape and crown, shoving you out onto a... stage? Your adoring public cheers for you, yells your name, and throws confetti in your honor! Then a jester appears again, announcing your grand title:
The Ugliest in All of Cerealia.
Don't worry, that's just your introduction to the carnival; enjoy the rest of your time here! (They may or may not have given you back your clothing.)
PHASE II [ 1600 ] Do you hear that? Cymbals crashing together, trumpets blaring off-tune, the march of absurdly tired feet – a parade is coming! Best move off to the side before an acrobat quite literally tumbles into you. If you are an unfortunate casualty, they’ll actually just start to fall asleep on you because they’re tired… so very, very tired.
Yet the parade continues to march on without them and you can let yourself be distracted by the impressive jumping around and festive partygoers (who seem to be joining in the parade as they please, in various states of undress). But be wary. Distraction will only make you easier prey for the very hungry caterpillar that’s coming up the street next. Run if you can, but it has so very many legs and it’s coming after you.
For those unable to make it away from the caterpillar, they will find themselves gulped right into its gross, drooling mouth – and about five minutes later, they’ll be released out again onto the streets covered in a pink slime. It looks like you won't be able to free yourself from the stuff, so hopefully you can find a friend to get some help! Or one of the strangers around you? Unfortunately, when a kind soul finally comes by to pull you out of the slime, they’ll find that the outside of the gunk is not only immensely sticky but also slippery. If they're not careful, you'll both end up stuck to the gunk together.
You both better get out of that stuff quick because once someone joins you, the slime starts to move. Quick and gooey, it'll pull you and the hapless soul with you down the street at a much too quick pace. Hopefully you won't slide into too many people as you skid your way through the streets of the Entertainment District like some sort of demented Katamari Ball. This is why you should never trust giant bugs!
PHASE III [ xxxx ] In a smaller booth, toward the outskirts of the carnival, some may find a familiar face manning a quiet little shack on her own. Although those who have been in the colony long enough may have first encountered her as an 8-bit version of herself, Aria the fortune-teller is now back and more than willing to drag unsuspecting people into her hands again. Once you step into her stall, she takes one long look at you before sliding over a fortune cookie and a mask. What do you mean you didn’t ask for a mask? That's too bad, because it's yours now. She won't say anything more than that, giving nothing more than a quiet dismissal with a hand and an enigmatic smile to match.
When you step back outside, you’ll find that you just can’t get rid of the mask. If you toss it into a trash bin, it’ll be right back in your pocket. Throw it at a friend? It’ll be in your hand in the next second. Throw it away enough times and it’ll suddenly plant itself on your face -- which leads to all the alien carnival goers in the nearby vicinity suddenly going still with fear before moving to get as far away from you as quickly as possible. Well... you seem to be able to take it off for now if you still want to enjoy the carnival. It just won't go away, and every time you try to throw it away, it'll attach itself to your face. Might as well just keep it.
But... still, it's strange how none of the aliens running the carnival will look you in the eye now, isn't it?
PHASE IV [ 1200 ] For those who aren’t interested in dealing with the abundance of people, there’s also an assortment of critters gathered around for the petting zoo! They all seem to follow a general theme… kind of. That might be floppy ears and a tail if you... squint. The alien staff is right there and quick to ask you not to worry, they're perfectly harmless -- they don't eat humans! It would be bad for their diet, so feel free to pet them, if you can gather enough courage to do so.
Unfortunately, it seems as though this part of the circus was not put together very well; the rickety fences and cages don't really seem to do much against these giant...creatures. Towards the end of the circus' time here, it looks like those cages will start breaking down more and more, too.
The animals rattle the makeshift fences of the petting zoo, until finally, the fences just... collapse. Oops. The ground shakes as the animals stomp and immediately move to break out of their little ring. Well, would you look at that? You’ve apparently found yourself in the middle of a little stampede -- and those warnings about these animals not eating humans doesn't seem to hold much weight when now they're looking at you -- and they look pretty hungry.
BONUS [ why o'clock ] Left and right, there are voices shouting for your attention. "Hey pretty young miss!" or "Excuse me, you stud!" or "Look at this, jackass!" – that said, aliens think that you all manage to look the same, so who knows if they’re yelling at you in particular – and they’re all daring you to come and try your hand at their carnival game.
It’s run of the mill stuff: shooting games, tests of strength, and knocking down a couple of milk bottles. You might actually be doing well! Or... you might be embarrassing yourself in front of whatever cute person you’re trying to impress! But regardless, in the last allotted ten seconds of your game, no matter what, you’ll find your point score plummeting right into the negatives. Did you get a bullseye? What do you know, that’s now worth -1000 points! You missed? -5000 points.
The stall assistant seems to be having a grand old time, laughing at your pain and when the clock finally runs out, they'll give you a large grin. "Look at that score! Well, you know what that means, don’t you? Now, we win you!" With that, metallic tentacles suddenly sprout from the booth itself, looking to capture you and whoever you’re with. Welcome to the carnival, now you're one of the prizes. And it seems you'll be here for quite some time. That is, of course, unless someone can win you back from these really horribly rigged games.
Looks like you'd better get comfortable hanging motionless from a display, like an oversized stuffed animal. You'll be here for a while.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
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ota!
Jasonthis sketchy asshole, then you're absolutely correct! You go, hypothetical person.He doesn't look very amused by that title, though.]
I see we're not aiming for creative insults today, huh? [Like, c'mon, man. They could have at least come up with something new and creative. This is like... so pre-school. Very boring and unexciting. 0/10. Would not do this again.
But with that, he exits stage left. Maybe wanders the carnival while wondering how to get out of here without getting dragged back in. Ditches the cape while he's at it. Keeps the crown, though. Cardboard crowns are the best, okay. Shut up.]
PHASE III:
Either way, he shoves the mask in one of his pockets and then proceeds to crack open the fortunate cookie.]
... "A smile is your passport into the hearts of others." Cute.
[MUCH LATER, he can also be found trying and failing to ditch the mask somewhere. It's, uh. Really creepy. And possibly cursed, considering that it keeps popping back up in his hand. That would be just his luck, wouldn't it? Now, lets just hope that one of his failed attempts at ditching them damn thing doesn't end with the mask hitting your chest. Or arm. Or face. Or any part of your body, really.
He's not going to be particularly sorry about any of that. Whoops.]
WILDCARD:
Phase I
It's an allusion to the Hunchback of Notre Dame by Victor Hugo when Quasimodo, that is, the hunchback was named Pope of Fools for being the ugliest person in Paris.
That's why the-ah... gypsy attire I've been forced into as well, emulating Esmeralda.
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[He probably could have worded that without being gross. Oh, well. He pauses for a second. Looks at her.]
You look like you need a jacket.
[... Because of the shivering, he means. He doesn't actually care about what she's wearing.]
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[She rubbed her arm. She didn't want to assume and nodded.]
They claimed they "lost" my clothes, unfortunately. [She was half tempted to turn into Mercury, if only for more appropriate clothing.]
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threeeee
[But nice as it would be to have two masks, one for each side of the belt on the flowy costume he's still happily wearing, he doesn't really need both. Chibi puts both hands in front of him, one above the other, and springs up two portals to send the mask hurtling the way it came. Think fast!]
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He watches it whiz by, and then, very eloquently:]
—Fucking shit.
[... HAS HE SEEN PORTALS LIKE THAT BEFORE, THOUGH??? He think he has. No, he's definitely sure he has. And while this would be a very good time to track down the culprit, he's kind of interrupted by, uh. Smacking himself with the mask when he brings a hand up to his face.
Looks like the portal wasn't even necessary, in the first place.]
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[... But his curiosity gets the better of him, and he turns around just to see Rojo (pronounced wrong) dodge the mask by a hair. It poofs, and-- Reappears on his hand??]
[He laughs aloud, maybe just a little mean-spirited - you can't get rid of it! - but mostly cheerful. Jason might see the cackling culprit as a somewhat crossdressing Chibi, who hasn't quite ditched the outfit they gave him upon entry. (Why, when this is so comfortable?)]
It seems to like you. [He says it as though the mask is sentient, like that's the most obvious thing in the world.]
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Phase I
Do you...know what's happening?
[Unlike some, she recognized none of the cultural references. Not the world's ugliest competition, not the reason for the clothing...]
[She just really wanted her shrine clothing back.]
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[In this post: The short answer is longer than the long answer. Ah.]
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Why would they set up a carnival if we're not supposed to enjoy it? Isn't what what carnivals are for?
[Based on her limited understanding of them. She'd never been to one herself, unless the occasional festival taking place in the local villages at the bottom of Eagle Mountain counted.]
...are we all sure this isn't another game of some kind?
[No, they weren't in ViVid--she did recognize that much--but, as unfamiliar with technology as she was, the distinction between the two was still sometimes a little fuzzy. This seemed like a game. So why wasn't it?]
no subject