Bright lights! An abundance of color! A cacophony of laughter and delighted (?) shrieks! Welcome, everyone, to the carnival! Enough of those nonsense protein shakes and that hoity-toity recycling; it's time to let loose, have some fun, and live a little! No judgment will be allowed today, not when everyone’s dressed up in ridiculous costumes and eating those unnecessarily huge turkey legs (it... is turkey, right?). For you see, CERES has invited the Traveling Circus of Tjghsldiwk (they hail from a different planet, but here's a hint: the h is silent) to bring some joy to the colonists. This is a safe place to let your inner wild child out, really. Definitely safe. Promise.
Yet for those who are a little less easily convinced to follow the sounds of laughter and amusement (bless your sensible hearts), they will find themselves grabbed and forcibly dragged by a pair of friendly souls in matching costumes. Everyone should be able to enjoy the festivities, don’t you think? Can’t have them missing out on all this jolly good, innocent fun!
The Public Announcement System crackles with... well, a fit of coughing first. But then a gravelly voice speaks! It seems the ringmaster has an announcement for you all. What joyous news can he bring?  Listen... I know that we’re supposed to keep these idiots entertained for at least another day or two but the machinery’s starting to complain. I think I heard the gates of the petting zoo groan – they’re on their last legs.
... Wait, this isn’t the direct line
Oh.
Ohohoho!! Have a great time, everyone! Everything is perfectly fine!
|
PHASE I [ 11 00 ] Come one, come all!! There’s quite a large amount of people here, isn’t there? You’ll find yourself tugged this way and that – up until you get dragged right into a changing booth. The helpful attendant meets you with a worryingly large grin – how is her face not breaking? – before pushing you right through the curtain. Then you’ll be given your choice of one of these lovely garments to change into. Look, one of them has to match your skintone, right? Don’t be picky about it! You also have... 90 seconds to figure out how to wear it before you’re tossed out into the middle of the crowd again. Have a good festival!
If you’re not willing to put on the outfits though, that’s fine. Instead, they’ll top you off with a cape and crown, shoving you out onto a... stage? Your adoring public cheers for you, yells your name, and throws confetti in your honor! Then a jester appears again, announcing your grand title:
The Ugliest in All of Cerealia.
Don't worry, that's just your introduction to the carnival; enjoy the rest of your time here! (They may or may not have given you back your clothing.)
PHASE II [ 1600 ] Do you hear that? Cymbals crashing together, trumpets blaring off-tune, the march of absurdly tired feet – a parade is coming! Best move off to the side before an acrobat quite literally tumbles into you. If you are an unfortunate casualty, they’ll actually just start to fall asleep on you because they’re tired… so very, very tired.
Yet the parade continues to march on without them and you can let yourself be distracted by the impressive jumping around and festive partygoers (who seem to be joining in the parade as they please, in various states of undress). But be wary. Distraction will only make you easier prey for the very hungry caterpillar that’s coming up the street next. Run if you can, but it has so very many legs and it’s coming after you.
For those unable to make it away from the caterpillar, they will find themselves gulped right into its gross, drooling mouth – and about five minutes later, they’ll be released out again onto the streets covered in a pink slime. It looks like you won't be able to free yourself from the stuff, so hopefully you can find a friend to get some help! Or one of the strangers around you? Unfortunately, when a kind soul finally comes by to pull you out of the slime, they’ll find that the outside of the gunk is not only immensely sticky but also slippery. If they're not careful, you'll both end up stuck to the gunk together.
You both better get out of that stuff quick because once someone joins you, the slime starts to move. Quick and gooey, it'll pull you and the hapless soul with you down the street at a much too quick pace. Hopefully you won't slide into too many people as you skid your way through the streets of the Entertainment District like some sort of demented Katamari Ball. This is why you should never trust giant bugs!
PHASE III [ xxxx ] In a smaller booth, toward the outskirts of the carnival, some may find a familiar face manning a quiet little shack on her own. Although those who have been in the colony long enough may have first encountered her as an 8-bit version of herself, Aria the fortune-teller is now back and more than willing to drag unsuspecting people into her hands again. Once you step into her stall, she takes one long look at you before sliding over a fortune cookie and a mask. What do you mean you didn’t ask for a mask? That's too bad, because it's yours now. She won't say anything more than that, giving nothing more than a quiet dismissal with a hand and an enigmatic smile to match.
When you step back outside, you’ll find that you just can’t get rid of the mask. If you toss it into a trash bin, it’ll be right back in your pocket. Throw it at a friend? It’ll be in your hand in the next second. Throw it away enough times and it’ll suddenly plant itself on your face -- which leads to all the alien carnival goers in the nearby vicinity suddenly going still with fear before moving to get as far away from you as quickly as possible. Well... you seem to be able to take it off for now if you still want to enjoy the carnival. It just won't go away, and every time you try to throw it away, it'll attach itself to your face. Might as well just keep it.
But... still, it's strange how none of the aliens running the carnival will look you in the eye now, isn't it?
PHASE IV [ 1200 ] For those who aren’t interested in dealing with the abundance of people, there’s also an assortment of critters gathered around for the petting zoo! They all seem to follow a general theme… kind of. That might be floppy ears and a tail if you... squint. The alien staff is right there and quick to ask you not to worry, they're perfectly harmless -- they don't eat humans! It would be bad for their diet, so feel free to pet them, if you can gather enough courage to do so.
Unfortunately, it seems as though this part of the circus was not put together very well; the rickety fences and cages don't really seem to do much against these giant...creatures. Towards the end of the circus' time here, it looks like those cages will start breaking down more and more, too.
The animals rattle the makeshift fences of the petting zoo, until finally, the fences just... collapse. Oops. The ground shakes as the animals stomp and immediately move to break out of their little ring. Well, would you look at that? You’ve apparently found yourself in the middle of a little stampede -- and those warnings about these animals not eating humans doesn't seem to hold much weight when now they're looking at you -- and they look pretty hungry.
BONUS [ why o'clock ] Left and right, there are voices shouting for your attention. "Hey pretty young miss!" or "Excuse me, you stud!" or "Look at this, jackass!" – that said, aliens think that you all manage to look the same, so who knows if they’re yelling at you in particular – and they’re all daring you to come and try your hand at their carnival game.
It’s run of the mill stuff: shooting games, tests of strength, and knocking down a couple of milk bottles. You might actually be doing well! Or... you might be embarrassing yourself in front of whatever cute person you’re trying to impress! But regardless, in the last allotted ten seconds of your game, no matter what, you’ll find your point score plummeting right into the negatives. Did you get a bullseye? What do you know, that’s now worth -1000 points! You missed? -5000 points.
The stall assistant seems to be having a grand old time, laughing at your pain and when the clock finally runs out, they'll give you a large grin. "Look at that score! Well, you know what that means, don’t you? Now, we win you!" With that, metallic tentacles suddenly sprout from the booth itself, looking to capture you and whoever you’re with. Welcome to the carnival, now you're one of the prizes. And it seems you'll be here for quite some time. That is, of course, unless someone can win you back from these really horribly rigged games.
Looks like you'd better get comfortable hanging motionless from a display, like an oversized stuffed animal. You'll be here for a while.
[ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with sensitive or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ] |
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no subject
Eh? No, I'm pretty sure I'll be okay. I mean, it's your fortune, right? As long as we don't go on a carnival ride together or something... [Will this be Final Destination?!]
Anyway, that part's not important! All you need to do is get another and it'll cancel this one right out!
[That's how these things work, right??]
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[ What if some alien walks over with some freshly-baked pies and trips and give them both third-degree burns?! Things Atsushi Contemplates.
He takes a step back away from Kashuu to give him extra space. If Kashuu gets hurt on his watch... how will he ever forgive himself... ]
But— do you think that would work? Is that how fortunes work?!
no subject
Sure it is! I just said so, yeah? [That's not how the world works, Kashuu.
But oh, beware, he's moving to grab hold of Atsushi's arm. NO ESCAPE NOW.]
So let's go already! The longer you wait, the worse your luck might get.
no subject
W-wait...! What if the next fortune I get is even worse...?!
[ His next fortune: 'lmfao bye'. Here he is, though, being dragged back into Aria's tent.
The fortune-teller in question gives the both of them A Look, as if to say 'what the hell are both these dunkasses doing here'... but eventually also tosses a cookie and a mask at Kashuu. One of us... ]
no subject
It'll be fine, it'll be fine! Don't worry about it. [But here they are, back for more?! Except Kashuu didn't sign up for this. He waves the mask indignantly in one hand, but is at least careful not to crush the cookie. It's for Atsushi, after all!!]
Hey! I don't want this ugly thing!
[But Aria is, of course, ignoring these morons... And will eventually disappear into the ether of the back room. Kashuu just sets the mask down on the counter and turns to leave, intending on ditching it. A FOOL.]
Geez... Let's get outta here, that lady's really creepy. And here! D'you want me to read your new fortune?
no subject
She really is weird... maybe she's giving out ominous fortunes on purpose.
[ He wouldn't even be surprised, let's be real. But he glances over Kashuu's shoulder, blinks at the cookie in his hand. ]
Ah, maybe this one should be considered your fortune...? But, sure— what does it say?
no subject
But no okay, AWAY THEY GO, Aria is probably grateful to have their dumb asses exit her shop. He's already breaking the cookie open, holding half of it out toward his dingus compadre.]
Here! The fortune saaays- [Reading the slip after popping his half of the cookie into his mouth. He'll pause to chew and swallow before saying it aloud because he wasn't raised in the woods (kinda), but his brow's already furrowed by the time he does.] "Perhaps you've been focusing too much on that one thing"? What's that supposed to mean? [Flipping it over to show Atsushi... A weird fortune complete with the super helpful word that's 100% Chinese.]
What do you think? Maybe that means you— [Oh, but then he raises his free hand and SURPRISE. THE MASK IS THERE IN IT.
Which naturally prompts Kashuu to scream and drop it like a brave warrior.]
no subject
He's about to say something about how this fortune's credibility is very much in question, but he's interrupted by this very sudden, very urgent scream.
??? What's Kashuu even yelling about, anyw—
—oh. ]
E-eh?! Ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhh?!
[ MORE SCREAMING... it's like a chorus of screams, one by one. ]
I-it's me, Kashuu-kun, I'm cursed!!! [ THE ONLY LOGICAL EXPLANATION, TO BE SURE... ]
no subject
Foolish both of these morons too, honestly. Kashuu's still screaming while Atsushi is screaming so they're really just a fantastic band of beautiful music right now... But he'll stop long enough to KEEP PANICKING, just with more words this time.]
WAAAH— Oh my god!! Oh my god! We have to get you de-cursed—?! [WHAT DOES THAT EVEN MEAN.
Also, he frisbees the mask into the distance for good measure...]
Quick, get rid of yours! We'll start there and then take you to someone who can purify you!!
no subject
[ WHY IS HE COMPLAINING ABOUT THAT ASPECT OF HIS SHITTY FORTUNE RIGHT NOW... but he follows suit in chucking his own murdermask as far away from himself as possible, and frantically looking around with his hands held as high over his head as he can manage.
What does this accomplish??? Absolutely nothing, but it's the thought that counts. ]
H, how do I purify myself?! Do I need to see an exorcist...?! K, Kashuu-kun, is that something you can do?!
[ Okay, calm down, this isn't the end of the world...! He looks around for someone that looks like they can help them, and—
—finds that fucking mask staring at him from a few feet away, hanging from the door of one of the nearby shacks.
Cue more screaming. ]
no subject
[But Atsushi probably doesn't want to be purified by this loser, let's be real... Anyway, Kashuu just assumes he's holding his hands up to the gods, hoping that they might rain down purification on him from the heavens or something. He's about to be like maybe you should try something else, but he's distracted by that scream!?
SO HE LOOKS.
And then he's screaming again too, of course, but this time he also launches forward to cling to Atsushi. SAVE HIM?!]
What's it doing there!! What does it want?! Why is does it want you—
[But since neither of their days are bad enough yet, the crowd is starting to part for some reason...! Oh, it's because Kashuu's mask is boomeranging back in their direction at the speed of sound so it can make its new home on Kashuu's face.
He's quiet for a second, but it's only because he's IN A STATE OF SHOCK.]
no subject
A moment of silence for the death of both of their composure.
And then: more distressed noises of disbelief. ]
K...K, K-k-k-k-k-kashuu-kun! You— your face!! It's on you!!
[ Forming coherent sentences are hard... not that he's trying to say anything important, but. His hands windmill, and then hover centimeters from Kashuu's head, debating whether or not he should try to take this mask off?? What does one even do in this situation?? ]
Does it hurt?! Can you understand me?! D, don't turn into a mask!?
[ LORD HELP THEM... He's shaking Kashuu's shoulders now, as if this will help. ]
no subject
Which is honestly probably terrifying as hell, considering how creepy that mask is.
But after that brief lapse into Horrortown, it very much seems like Kashuu is still Kashuu under there! He reaches out to grab Atsushi's shoulders and shakes him in turn, because if they both do it, that means it'll be twice as helpful!]
GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF, GET IT OFF—!!
[Ah, people are definitely starting to give them a wide berth... Also, apparently he's forgotten that his hands are still perfectly functional.]
I need to be purified, too?! [Why is that a question.]
no subject
[ SCREAM... Kashuu's taken them on a one-way ride to Horrorville, no return trips. Atsushi stands there limply for a few seconds, letting Kashuu shake him back and forth as he also... shakes Kashuu back and forth. What is going on here, what happened to them. ]
Wh- what if I pull too hard and pull your face off?!
[ How does this even remotely make any sense?! He's panicking, logic is that last thing on his mind right now, let's be real. It takes a moment, but Atsushi finally pulls it together enough to hook an index finger carefully, carefully under the chin portion of Kashuu's mask, and it almost seems like he'll be able to lift it off—
—if not for a sudden interruption in the form of his own haunted relic attaching itself to his shoulder. Terrifying... his alarm and subsequent loud yell causes him to snap Kashuu's mask back against his face, sorry friend. ]
no subject
[Is he sure, though? Is he really sure?? Now he's kind of concerned about that too, which is just dumb. They're both dumb and they're only making their collective lives harder.
But lo! He's actually starting to lift the mask off and it doesn't even hurt! Kashuu feels relieved for about .5 seconds before Atsushi is screaming again and the mask comes snapping back onto his poor face with a vengeance.]
OW—!! That hurt! [It... it didn't really, he's just a whiny baby... But at least he seems to remember that he has hands now, so he moves to lift the mask off himself. There's a red mark on his nose where he was bopped particularly hard... But more importantly:]
—It's on you again!?
no subject
[ Atsushi wills himself to calm down... calm down. What would his coworkers at the Detective Agency do, in this situation? They wouldn't just sit around and scream all day, that's for sure— there has to be a logical, practical way to go about solving this problem.
So Atsushi pivots on his feet, points to the makeshift incinerator that the carnival is using to... burn garbage? Who knows, but it's like a little campfire, and Atsushi sees an opportunity.
(This can only end badly.) ]
We... have to burn them.
[ Some tigers just want to watch the world burn. ]
no subject
Good idea!
[Why does Kashuu immediately agree. He's holding his mask out in front of him with both hands though, so clearly he's not keen on the idea of continuing to carry it around.]
Maybe we can just bless the fire ourselves first! That way it can be like the stuff that you purify your omamori with at the start of a new year!
[That isn't how this works at all...]
no subject
So he peels his mask off his shoulder with his thumb and forefinger, picks at it while slowly inching his way to the 'incinerator'. As if the mask would be able to tell that Atsushi is planning for it to meet a fiery death. ]
How would we bless the fire? [ He's actually whispering now, god save him. ] Is there some sort of...chant?
no subject
[That's. That's a really good question...?! Kashuu, prompted by Atsushi, will now start whispering too! But that still doesn't mean he'll be able to pull a chant out of the air, good lord.]
...Ishikirimaru's usually the one who does it, but I think one of 'em is just "harae tamae, kiyome tamae"? [Why does he sound so uncertain. More importantly--] —But I'm not a priest or anything! Are you?!
no subject
[ WOW?? Somehow, Atsushi finds the worst timing to be the straight man.
But they can't very well do this without performing some kind of ritual, huh. So.
Atsushi clasps his hands in front of his face (mask dangling from his shoulder), and says: ] My name is Atsushi Nakajima, 18 years old, born on May 5th! Thank you for watching over me all these years, and please let me burn this mask to purify myself!
[ This is basically what people say on New Years, on their hatsumoude... it isn't a chant at all... ]
no subject
But the worst part about the rest of this is he totally knows this isn't a chant, and yet he still thinks it might somehow work?! GO, ATSUSHI, GET THAT BLESSED FIRE STARTED. Though with a saying like that, Kashuu's a little concerned--]
Hey— would that work for me?! I don't have a birthday!
[HOW CAN HE PURIFY HIMSELF WITHOUT A BIRTHDAY.]
no subject
With his mask raised over the fire (this is not a wise position to be in), he turns towards Kashuu and raises his brows. ]
...Eh? You really don't have a birthday, Kashuu-kun...? [ This is like, the second person he's met here who is Bad about birthdays. ] Not even a day you were forged?
no subject
[DON'T GET BURNT, ATSUSHI. He's concerned the cursed mask might somehow raise the fires higher or something... Real worries. The fear is also real. AS FOR THE QUESTION--]
Uh— I don't remember when I was forged, exactly. It's not really written anywhere either, so- [A sloping shrug.] But Haruji lets us celebrate our birthdays on his! Does that count?
no subject