[CLOSED] Howling with laughter, panic, alarm, and distress

[criticalhip]

Who: The Super Skeleton Bros. (spaghettibia & criticalhip) with Their Not-Adopted Child (trueend), guest starring An Annoying Dog
When: Backdated to just after the Dating Sim Hunger Games
Where: Frisk’s apartment
What: Bringing Papyrus and Sans up to speed on the Cerealian ways, gratuitous exposition, and thinly veiled foreshadowing. Also a very annoying dog.
Rating/Warning: Unbridled wordplay and the occasional use of the word ‘heck’. If you’re trying to avoid Undertale spoilers, you may not want to look in here.

---

[Somehow, some way, Sans and Papyrus managed to make it out of that fustercluck of a level dumped upon them like a bucket full of cold, murky water that had been sitting outside for the better part of a month. Schlepping their way to the apartments and claiming their own went without much of a hitch (minor squabbling aside), as did eventually adventuring to the understandably messy living space of a certain human ten-year-old.]

[With the excitement of surviving the Dating Sim Extravaganza still crashing down harder than a lead balloon (even if it’s been a while), Sans finds the nearest couch, plops himself face down into the soft cushions, and raises his fist in a thumbs-up, his voice muffled as he addresses anyone willing to listen, which is admittedly pretty hard with a pillow covering his mouth.]

I dig your digs, kiddo.

Comments

[trueend]

[Ah, the couch. The place where they shove all their school books when they're not using them. Sans might feel something hard hidden beneath one of the corner cushions, but then again — those cushions are pretty soft, and this is Sans. Maybe anything is comfortable as long as it's horizontal?

Oh, well. They return that thumbs-up, even if Papyrus might be the only one to see it, and somehow manage to understand what their friend is saying.]

Thank you. I dig my digs, too.

[It's a very nice apartment, mind you. Too bad it's in need of a proper sweeping and mopping. Now, uh. What do people do when inviting others into their home? There are rules for this, they're sure. Um.]

D'you guys want... food? Juice? I have fruit punch... I think. Water, too.

[This is why we don't let 10-year-olds stock their own kitchen.]

[spaghettibia]

[ Papyrus, for his part, like the nosy busybody he is, preoccupies himself with inspecting Frisk's apartment like he's some kind of...apartment inspection skeleton. No, that was not one of the many jobs he accepted when he arrived, but it's one he's happy to do, nonetheless! After all, he has to make sure the place Frisk has been staying by themselves is up to snuff!

...Up to snuff with whatever ten-year-old humans need to be up to snuff on, anyway. He may not be sure what he's looking for, but he'll know it when he sees it!

That, and tasking himself with such a thing keeps his mind from wandering to other...less savory topics. Like their world being destroyed. You know. Fun things like that.

Papyrus plucks one of the school books out of the couch and slips through it appraisingly. Hm, yes, this will do. Apparently. ]

Do you have the necessary ingredients for spaghetti? This must have been a trying time for you, since it's been awhile since I've been around to make it for you! Fortunately, all is right now.

[ ...As far as Frisk getting the chance to eat Papyrus's spaghetti goes, anyway. ]

[criticalhip]

[Sans gives the tiniest of displeased grunts when Papyrus disturbs the delicate balance he's achieved between books and cushions. Doesn't he know there's an exact science behind living comfortably in a mess? He readjusts himself, even going as far as to move his head just enough for a single eye socket to peek over a mound of fabric and glance around at his conversation partners.]

Just ketchup for me if you've got any.

[He pauses to yawn.]

After that, maybe we should ketchup with each other.

[He pauses again, this time to allow ample space for the inevitable groaning.]

[trueend]

[Oh, god. Not the spaghetti. They had lived such a short, blessed, spaghetti-free life. Their stomach is whispering "no" but their heart is saying, "don't crush Papyrus's culinary hopes and dreams". It was nice knowing their taste buds while they lasted. Now they must go meet their maker... whatever that means.

Except, Frisk isn't sure they have the ingredients to cook up anything resembling spaghetti.]

I have... noodles. [The kind you use for instant ramen, mind you.] ... No vegetables, though. Or meat? Or sauce. Just noodles. And ketchup.

[Scrunching their nose, just a little. That pun was atrocious. Awful. Shame on him. Except they are totally adding, after a beat—]

Think that limits our... pastabilities. Sorry.

[Ba dum tshhhhhhhhh.]

[spaghettibia]

[ These two. THESE TWO. THESE TWO WILL BE THE DEATH OF HIM WITH THESE PUNS. ]

Do either of you have no self-respect?! [ It's shameful. It's so shameful, he has to turn away from them. It's definitely not because he's trying to hide a stupid grin. Nope.

He'll use this opportunity to consider their spaghetti dilemma. ]

Hmm...I could give it a try, but without the proper ingredients, it won't be quite the same! Ketchup wouldn't work instead of sauce, either... [ Spaghetti with ketchup, perish the thought. ] I suppose you'll just have to wait until I have everything I need to make it! The anticipation must be killing you! Just how long have you been here, again?

[ How long has poor Frisk had to go spaghetti-less? ]

[criticalhip]

[Do either of them look like people with any smidgeon of self-respect???]

[And spaghetti with ketchup sounds awesome. Don't knock it.]

[But Papyrus does bring up a good point-- just how long has Frisk been here? It's definitely been much longer than either him or his brother what with the state of the apartment, but that leads to another line of questioning on what kind of space-time shenanigans they're dealing with, who's responsible this time, and what the good golly happened to everyone's happy ending.]

[That bit, in particular, is a real kick in the butt.]

Yeah.

Looks like you've been doing pretty well for yourself.

[trueend]

[SELF RESPECT IS FOR CHUMPS and for people who don't find Papyrus's reaction funny. They try (and fail) to stifle their giggles, putting a hand in front of their mouth to be "discreet" even when Papyrus turns around. They really, really, really missed having their friends around. A lot of them are still missing, and Frisk isn't sure they want them here with what they've seen of this place so far, but having the brothers around is extremely refreshing.

It's been a long month, that's for certain.

And speaking of months — they sober up slightly when asked how long they've been here. Still smiling, sure. But their smile is starting to droop at the corners.]

A month. Maybe less...? Or more. [Between their arrival, the carnival, getting dragged to the dark parts of the colony... Time got a little blurry.] 'M okay, though. I'm good at taking care of myself, and... People here are really nice.

[Most of them. Some of them. They don't know how to breach the topic of how dangerous this place is, so they don't. Avoiding subjects you don't like is super cool.]

[spaghettibia]

[ You two are literally the worst.

Though the thought of Frisk being her on their own for almost a month is somewhat sobering. What did they do in their life without the unparalleled guidance only Papyrus could supply? And while he doesn't doubt Frisk's ability to take care of themselves - after all, they did make it through the entire underground mostly on their own - still! He can't help but fret over their well-being.

His impression of this city so far...well, he sees room for improvement, to say the least. For example, maybe not starting off their stay with a ballroom blood bath. ]

I did meet some inspiring characters in the jungle! And some very nice bunnies. I'm sure you've made many excellent friends, Frisk!

[ Frisk, after all, has excellent taste in friends. Just look at himself and his brother. ]

[criticalhip]

[The droop in Frisk's smile doesn't escape Sans' notice, and he files the scene away for later use. If that jungle was anything to go by--inspiring characters and bunnies aside--they must have dealt with their own share of surprises over the month. The cynic inside him mulls over a slew of different, equally awful, possibilities and is only quelled slightly when Frisk mentions other nice people around.]

[From his experience, Frisk tried to find good in every person they'd met, so that didn't say too much for the other residents regardless of their otherwise excellent skeletal taste. He'll be the judge of just how nice these friends are.]

[But they're okay now, and that's what matters. That, and the fact that he and his brother aren't going to stand by and let anything happen to them (Papyrus more so than him, but Sans can be a decent cheerleader when the time calls for it).]

You should introduce us to 'em.