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retorter & npc bar customers & npc children & OPEN
When: 7/18 morning & afternoon, plus anytime after if u text him
Where: at a dive bar nearest to the apartments + a portable shrine
What: Souji continues to make Intelligent and Healthy decisions following his demise by getting into bar fights and deciding that he'll never talk to anyone ever again, nice.
Rating/Warning: angst, bar fights, npc children asking the Smart questions
[ Souji wakes up to noise. Deafening, loud, and just chaotic enough for him to actually flinch back from the sound, for him to gasp for air and grip the grimy counter underneath him in total and utter confusion and stare wildly around him, at everyone else whose lives sucks balls enough to be drinking at ass o'clock in the morning.
Which isn't many, but it's a number of people higher than the last group Souji remembers, and no one's face is familiar.
(Also Souji's still in his fucking pjs, god damn it.)
He remembers, of course he remembers. The memories hammer into him like a day-old hangover, his face twisting, twisting until the brittle veneer breaks.
He died. Fine, so he died. He wasn't dead any longer, or maybe whatever bullshit revival system in place here meant that he hadn't actually died because wasn't his body made out of code? But Souji can't really think well on subjects that he doesn't understand, so he bypasses that in favor of the ones he does. That he died, and that he had died in the way he had promised himself he wouldn't. As a monster, as a rasetsu, just like the rest of the members of the Shinsengumi that had been forced to drink the ochimizu and turned mad, like those rejects Souji had both pitied and scorned. He didn't care to dwell on that particular irony, even as the brittle, small part inside of him murmurs how funny it was, how well-deserved, for Souji to have pretended that he was better than any of them in the end.
His hands instinctively go to his throat, remembering the feeling of his wakizashi in his arm and the katana biting into his neck. He had died a monster, but at least he had died -- but did it really matter that he hadn't killed anyone when he had already lost his humanity well before that point? He hadn't fought against it. He hadn't even tried to stop himself or drive his own sword into his heart. He had been mindless, but most of all, he had been weak. His mouth twists again, there's a taste on his tongue that he can't quite wash out -- the taste of blood.
Souji presses a fist to his mouth and makes a low, retching sound deep in his throat. I tasted blood, I can't have blood, I can't go crazy --
If I'm crazy, then I --
He almost shrinks in on himself, shoving his head between his hands and taking deep noisy breaths in order to focus on the fact that he is alive and in one piece and not crazy because fuck it, he's not. He won't allow himself to be. He won't!
Even though, he did. Even though he had no control over it. Even though he had gone crazy anyway, so his so-called bravado was worth nothing in the end, didn't it?
So, he snaps. ]
option A, at the bar
[ Later, he can't exactly say he remembers what started it. Maybe the wrong look, maybe an accidental brush of elbows at the crowded counter, but whatever it is, Souji turns on the offender with a fury that far outweighs the offense given. His hands skip to his sides to grab at his wakizashi and sword, before he remembers oh right, yet another thing that was taken from him -- and that reminder stokes his rage even higher, so he actually ends up grabbing the side of the man's head and smashing it into the counter.
bar fight, bar fight.
Souji fights to the point where he's not fighting one person anymore, but everyone and anyone, and the bartender's shouting something and the man whose arm he's just broken is shrieking in pain, and Souji doesn't so much as punch people as he does physically try to murder them.
the chaos ends pretty abruptly. the sensible ones fleeing, the reckless idiots lying stone-cold and unconscious on the floor, and Souji, bruised and injured and livid with rage but also clutching at the remains of a bar stool. He looks around, looks at himself and his choices, and then sits at one of the few stools that aren't broken.
just in time for anyone to wander into the bar, looking for a snack! (Or maybe you were there the whole time drinking and ignoring that stupid bar fight, but either way) Souji doesn't so much as look in the newcomer's direction, he just stares at the wall. ]
[ and then. ]
It's closed.
option B; Somewhere in Cerealia;;
[ okay, so he couldn't stay in that bar forever, so Souji braves the bright outdoors to get out of there. He doesn't know where he's going, he just knows he's going to go. He can't keep sitting around or he might just start another profoundly stupid bar fight.
The only problem is that walking around in broad daylight means walking around feeling like the sun is personally attacking him, which only dampens his mood further. So now, Souji, in his plain sleepwear splattered with the blood of his Bar Enemies and barefoot, continues to wander aimlessly, his gait slowly lagging until he takes a seat at nearby portable shrine.
and stares into space, looking like Death. Anyone who passes by will probably see Death Souji sitting, eyes half-lidded as a couple of kids??? crowd around him
"Souji! Hey, Souji! Where've you been all this time?" or "What's wrong with your clothes? Are you a beggar now? My mom said I shouldn't speak to beggars!" or "It's the afternoon, aren't you supposed to be working?"
lord, someone please save him. ]
OR Option C; aka skip all this and just text the fcker
[ he still has his Cerevice on him. and he might even be in the mood to text back! go ahead. GO AHEAD AND SEE. ]
retorter & npc bar customers & npc children & OPENWhen: 7/18 morning & afternoon, plus anytime after if u text him
Where: at a dive bar nearest to the apartments + a portable shrine
What: Souji continues to make Intelligent and Healthy decisions following his demise by getting into bar fights and deciding that he'll never talk to anyone ever again, nice.
Rating/Warning: angst, bar fights, npc children asking the Smart questions
[ Souji wakes up to noise. Deafening, loud, and just chaotic enough for him to actually flinch back from the sound, for him to gasp for air and grip the grimy counter underneath him in total and utter confusion and stare wildly around him, at everyone else whose lives sucks balls enough to be drinking at ass o'clock in the morning.
Which isn't many, but it's a number of people higher than the last group Souji remembers, and no one's face is familiar.
(Also Souji's still in his fucking pjs, god damn it.)
He remembers, of course he remembers. The memories hammer into him like a day-old hangover, his face twisting, twisting until the brittle veneer breaks.
He died. Fine, so he died. He wasn't dead any longer, or maybe whatever bullshit revival system in place here meant that he hadn't actually died because wasn't his body made out of code? But Souji can't really think well on subjects that he doesn't understand, so he bypasses that in favor of the ones he does. That he died, and that he had died in the way he had promised himself he wouldn't. As a monster, as a rasetsu, just like the rest of the members of the Shinsengumi that had been forced to drink the ochimizu and turned mad, like those rejects Souji had both pitied and scorned. He didn't care to dwell on that particular irony, even as the brittle, small part inside of him murmurs how funny it was, how well-deserved, for Souji to have pretended that he was better than any of them in the end.
His hands instinctively go to his throat, remembering the feeling of his wakizashi in his arm and the katana biting into his neck. He had died a monster, but at least he had died -- but did it really matter that he hadn't killed anyone when he had already lost his humanity well before that point? He hadn't fought against it. He hadn't even tried to stop himself or drive his own sword into his heart. He had been mindless, but most of all, he had been weak. His mouth twists again, there's a taste on his tongue that he can't quite wash out -- the taste of blood.
Souji presses a fist to his mouth and makes a low, retching sound deep in his throat. I tasted blood, I can't have blood, I can't go crazy --
If I'm crazy, then I --
He almost shrinks in on himself, shoving his head between his hands and taking deep noisy breaths in order to focus on the fact that he is alive and in one piece and not crazy because fuck it, he's not. He won't allow himself to be. He won't!
Even though, he did. Even though he had no control over it. Even though he had gone crazy anyway, so his so-called bravado was worth nothing in the end, didn't it?
So, he snaps. ]
option A, at the bar
[ Later, he can't exactly say he remembers what started it. Maybe the wrong look, maybe an accidental brush of elbows at the crowded counter, but whatever it is, Souji turns on the offender with a fury that far outweighs the offense given. His hands skip to his sides to grab at his wakizashi and sword, before he remembers oh right, yet another thing that was taken from him -- and that reminder stokes his rage even higher, so he actually ends up grabbing the side of the man's head and smashing it into the counter.
bar fight, bar fight.
Souji fights to the point where he's not fighting one person anymore, but everyone and anyone, and the bartender's shouting something and the man whose arm he's just broken is shrieking in pain, and Souji doesn't so much as punch people as he does physically try to murder them.
the chaos ends pretty abruptly. the sensible ones fleeing, the reckless idiots lying stone-cold and unconscious on the floor, and Souji, bruised and injured and livid with rage but also clutching at the remains of a bar stool. He looks around, looks at himself and his choices, and then sits at one of the few stools that aren't broken.
just in time for anyone to wander into the bar, looking for a snack! (Or maybe you were there the whole time drinking and ignoring that stupid bar fight, but either way) Souji doesn't so much as look in the newcomer's direction, he just stares at the wall. ]
[ and then. ]
It's closed.
option B; Somewhere in Cerealia;;
[ okay, so he couldn't stay in that bar forever, so Souji braves the bright outdoors to get out of there. He doesn't know where he's going, he just knows he's going to go. He can't keep sitting around or he might just start another profoundly stupid bar fight.
The only problem is that walking around in broad daylight means walking around feeling like the sun is personally attacking him, which only dampens his mood further. So now, Souji, in his plain sleepwear splattered with the blood of his Bar Enemies and barefoot, continues to wander aimlessly, his gait slowly lagging until he takes a seat at nearby portable shrine.
and stares into space, looking like Death. Anyone who passes by will probably see Death Souji sitting, eyes half-lidded as a couple of kids??? crowd around him
"Souji! Hey, Souji! Where've you been all this time?" or "What's wrong with your clothes? Are you a beggar now? My mom said I shouldn't speak to beggars!" or "It's the afternoon, aren't you supposed to be working?"
lord, someone please save him. ]
OR Option C; aka skip all this and just text the fcker
[ he still has his Cerevice on him. and he might even be in the mood to text back! go ahead. GO AHEAD AND SEE. ]
no subject
Souji in turn, actually directs his gaze from whatever he was staring at to look at Mary, then at her tiny hand in his own.
His face tightens, an emotion flashing across his face that's too quick to tell, but he doesn't pull his hand away. instead, his mouth curves into a joyless smile. ]
I thought I could use a little fresh air.
[ while looking like death. ]
no subject
[ SHE SAYS SO SERIOUSLY TO SOUJI OKITA. But it's obvious that Mary's concerned, despite her bluntness, and she gives his hand a tug. Look, the kids parted for her, she's got this. Please stop sitting here, she'll find you a place to lie down until you look more like someone who stepped out of a shoujo sweetly threatening death. ]
no subject
lord, it's totally endearing, but he feels almost worse to have Mary very solemnly tell him the truths he should already know himself. ]
You sure don't pull any punches.
[ maybe if he pretends to joke a lot, then Mary will magically ignore his condition (it's a nice dream). ]
Shouldn't you be inside somewhere getting tutored?
no subject
[ So nice try, Souji, but her tutor ditched her to go hang out in the Nexus Code and she doesn't have another teacher. ]
So you can't make me go away, either.
no subject
I just figured you'd have more important things to do than talk to people like me.
[ His lip curls, because he didn't actually mean to sound like a sad trombone there and now he's regretting he said anything at all. he's just matter-of-fact??? why can't Sousei come back to take care of Mary???? ]
no subject
So if I see you, of course I'm going to want to talk to you, even if you're acting weird.
no subject
Is that how it works?
[ souji says as if he wouldn't know... ]
Since we're friends, then you'll leave me alone if I tell you to, right?
[ is that how friendship works??? Souji says, while still looking down at Mary's small hand. ]
no subject
[ Gosh Souji you need to brush up on your Friendship 101. ]
no subject
sure, he could take all his feelings out on Mary maybe if he really was a genuine asshole, but well, it's for the same reason he didn't chase away those npc children earlier, wasn't it. as much as he'd like to say that he's a monster and a sword that only exists to kill, he does treasure every chance he has with people like Mary. just genuinely caring and innocent, and honest with their feelings.
it'd be a shame if he said something to ruin that now. ]
Completely okay? [ how about maybe 55% okay??? still, he manages a smile, so maybe he's at that 55% mark already. ] That's a tall order. So, what exactly do I have to do to convince you that I'm completely okay?
no subject
[ Someone he can talk to. A doctor, if he's injured. But she hates seeing him like this, like he has to struggle to remember how to be. ]
no subject
That's easy enough to do.
[ except he's allergic to all doctors besides otome. some of his amusement peters away, leaving him quiet. ]
I'll head home once it gets dark out. You'll let me do that much at least, won't you?
[ have mercy, queen mary ]
no subject
[ Mary doesn't even know where he lives. ]