« 005 ⇢ event005.exe »

[reparator]

Who: CERES & you
When: IC: 10/04 | OOC: 11/15
Where: ViViD & McCERES
What: Intro Log
Rating/Warning: PG-13 | slightly nsfw

//event005.EXE Learning is Fundamental! Let's play CERESLearn ViViD's usual worlds are unfortunately down for maintenance. While CERES' programmers work on getting it back up and running, all new entrees this round will be going through a different level than usual. Only a single world is accessible at the moment, a simple one entitled 'CERESLearn.' "What the $%@& is this?" you must be thinking. Well, it's simple! It's a study program, of course! CERES' advanced AI technology is here to make sure you learn and that you learn sexily. Whether or not you pay attention to the actual content is up to you, the player. Please enjoy it while it lasts. They're here to teach you a variety of subjects and also to make you feel vaguely uncomfortable all over. New arrivals and those logging into ViViD will first find themselves in a classroom with a new operator greeting them rather than Vidia. "Greetings and welcome to Cerealia! It's nice of you to join us at last. As you can see, we're just about to get started! Here are the instructions: ♥ Choose your subject of choice. They include things like medicine, math, CERES economics, CERES history, fun facts about Julius, engineering, and science! ♥ Choose your tutor. You can hire Astor, Hilda, or UN-Zippy ♥ They'll teach you slowly, deliberately, sensually. Then after that, they'll drill you hard and without stopping. ♥ Just when you think you've had enough, they'll quiz you all over until you're sweating and panting. ♥ For those of you who pass, you'll be welcomed well into Cerealia and be given a free voucher for a McCERES Mildly Content meal. Please enjoy!"

//SCENARIOS.EXE PHASE I [ xxxx ] Once you choose your lesson and your tutor, you will be transported to a classroom where you and a few other players who decide to choose the same lesson will sit with your tutor after school, getting knowledge taught to you by someone who seems more intent on learning what's under your clothes than filling your head with knowledge. They will be awkwardly stretching, dropping pencils by 'accident' on the floor, and bending down slowly to pick them up. Certain things might be spilling out of their clothes. Awkward things. They will breathe down your neck and make sure you are well-versed in their anatomy by the end of the lesson. Fortunately, it won't last long as their bodies start to flicker erratically. PHASE II [ xxxx ] Just as things begin to escalate, the flickering will grow intense until your tutor will start to morph before your eyes. What takes their place is something that is anything but friendly. And yes, it will continue to breathe down your neck and speak in a sweet, soft, alluring voice while reaching out with its 'hands' to try and touch you. This will be your cue to run through the halls of the school while That Thing chases you in every single direction imaginable. There will be others joining you as everyone starts bolting out of their classrooms. PHASE III [ xxxx ] Feeling tired already? Well, don't stop and rest now! For those who successfully murder their own tutor, they will get their food voucher and a lovely welcome into CERES. You've officially passed! Everyone will be allowed to mingle around the game room in the CERES Research Tower before being directed into McCERES just across the street. For those who were already in the colony, you will also receive a voucher and directions to McCERES at the end of the game in case you want to go meet up with the newcomers there or just eat some artery-killing fast food. PHASE IV [ xxxx ] For those who get eaten by That Thing or don't pass their quizzes and upset their tutors, they will be forced to endure the Price of Failure. This means being sent to the gym with the other 'failures' to endure a painfully slow and erotic striptease by UN-Zippy. Once that is over, they will then be logged out and allowed to have their complimentary McCERES voucher. BONUS [ whyo'clock ] Congratulations on surviving CERESLearn! Here's your complimentary voucher for a free Mildly Content Meal at McCERES. This month's special is also the McKnight Burger. Characters are immediately invited to take a load off and enjoy some good ol' fashion fast food of questionable origin. Those who decide to order and eat here will also get a special toy included inside their Mildly Content Meals. [ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ]

//RUN.EXE Welcome to CEREALIA's latest intro post. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's usual arrival experience (which is not entirely applicable this round for reasons stated above^) and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!

Comments

[bigstick]

[ DEATH ALWAYS DEATH. at birthday's narration, america lets out a yell and swings his foot to... kick roachlette halfway across the restaurant. that's happening, yep. ]

NOTHING. Ya damn bug! You're not even anthropomorphized enough for love!

[ don't... respond to the fake story, america. ]

[bigstick]

[ vehemently shakes his head!! ]

Naw though. Robots? Lasers? Dope as shit, but cockroaches? No way! Make it like... make bunnies! Imagine a robo-bunny that shot lasers, it'd be adorable and epic, the perfect combination!

[ during this whole thing he's like, waving his hands around in enthusiasm as he pictures the robunny. see, that belongs in a happy meal for sure. ]

[bigstick]

[ uh huh, sure. no time to stop and grab a bite. i see how it is. ]

Hell yeah. You haven't been introduced to the delicacy that is ice cream, milk, ice, and a lil' bit of vanilla. That is disgusting.

[bigstick]

[ but fried alligator is way more badass than rats. anyone can catch a rat, it takes a real man to catch an alligator. also everyone is so suspicious of the food here, y'alls need to chill out. geez! ]

Yeah, yeah. Can do, bro. [ waves a hand dismissively even though...

yes. yes he is ordering-- ] One medium vanilla milkshake, my good lady.

[ and yes, yes he is waiting but...

ah, yes. yes he is making shinpachi pay for it. casually gestures to the cashier and looks at shinpachi for him to pay. the cashier is totally looking at shinpachi for it too. whoops. ]

[deontology]

[Clearly we're off to a stunning start here.

Because that just gets the flattest of looks, before he dismisses the part and addresses the bit about his name.]

I don't know what you mean. [But it's said rather...flatly. He knows his name is strange here, but he's going to make a point of not acknowledging any point America might make now.]

[bigstick]

Sure you're not!

[ the most... condescending tone of cheer ever but it is what it is. also how are you going to make new friends if you physically assault them, nice? that is not barney approved whatsoever!

he totally senses when nice gets on the milkshake train and a bit of a manic grin splits his face but, really, america's always kind of manic looking. ]

Don't it just? And you can get one at the McCERES without even a problem! I had one earlier, it was great! [ god, america. way to sound like a drug pusher. ] I mean, it ain't an all american diner shake like I'd like but boy, was it nice in a pinch! And ain't that what quick, good food is all about?

[ i'm lovin' it™ ]

C'mon now, let's go get a shake!

[ casually.... drags nice off to the mcceres ]

[foodcritic]

I'm not really picky. Just don't put any tomatoes in it, got it?

[she does have favorites, but they are reserved for certain people to make. otherwise? she's not very particular. as long as it tastes good.]

[bigstick]

[ exactly! it can only go up from here.

also if your intent was to throw him off or make him feel strange for asking, that is... not happening, sousei. america is... well, he's himself. ]

I mean like, is no your middle name? What kind of middle name is no? Like, imagine some dude all "yes, hello, my name is Edward No Price. Yes, no is my middle name. No, my parents weren't crazy they just really liked the word no." Which says a lot bout who that guy's fucking, y'know? Hah!

[ america, what is... wrong with you... ]

Abay is weird too but, whatever. Sousei though, Sousei makes sense. A nice normal name. Japanese, right? Too bad it's your last na-- Wait, wait. Are you Japanese? That would mean your first name is Sousei which, dude, thank god! Then just tell people you're Sousei, that's totally way more normal.

[foodcritic]

That's more like it. [of course, there's a lot she doesn't know or fully understand, but she's going to bluff until... that actually comes up. for now? she's got her hands on her hips and she's looking at him triumphantly.] I know this place is pretty weird, so you better hold on to your hat.

[she's pretty sure that's an okay place to use that phrase.]

[deontology]

[... why is this happening.......... America is the rudest person he's ever met, and he knows Tenka. That's really saying something right there. What is wrong with you.]

... I am Japanese, yes.

[This guy...is a total asshole.]

Abe is my family name, which I would prefer you use. [because you're a dick. Don't call him Sousei, dude.]

[bigstick]

[ at the very dramatic, because it's gotta be very dramatic since ciel's a freaking baby, finger point, america jumps a little and presses a hand to his chest in true genteel southerner fashion. ]

Wha--

[ geez! he doesn't deserve this! he tried to hook ciel up and then saved him from a monster and this is what he gets?! this little brat! with a huff america picks up the skewer a bit and then shoves it back down hard, firmly wedging it in the floor of the school hallway. then he crosses his arms and huffs. ]

I've legit just spent the last twenty minutes or so helping you out, you brat! So I'd appreciate it if you stopped doing this whole... whine like a baby thing because, dude! Don't care for it very much! Get your shit together and if there's one monster here, there might be another so we can like, stick together or you can fuck off. Which, by the way, with how banged up you look, doesn't seem very smart!

[ stupid brats not appreciating his help. geez, english people are the worst. ]

[bigstick]

[ well, that clears it up nicely, doesn't it! america keeps up the dubious look of disdain for a second long before dropping it and grinning. he sticks out a hand for sousei to shake despite... knowing he's japanese now and beams widely. ]

Cool! No probs. I'm America, by the way. [ a beat and he remembers, ] Like, the country. You know the country, right?

[ these folks not knowing nations, what even. ]

[harepiece]

[He doesn't seem too surprised to hear that, offering an encouraging smile.]

Then you can stand behind me and I'll protect you from that, too. Just grab my hand if you need to, okay?

[harepiece]

[Free food is the bridge that spans all languages and people...]

The people who've been here before seem to be the ones who look like they've been waiting at a train station for hours. [Chilly, slightly cranky, anxious, or expectant...]

...Or the ones avoiding the food. [GUYS.] Most of the ones I've met have been really nice, at least! I got some maps and lists from a few and warnings from others. Oh - someone wrote down their favorite restaurants for me, too!

[harepiece]

Oh! Well, that's convenient, having everything in one place like that. [He holds the card up a little, tilting it side to side and looking over its surface.]

A free house is nice, too! Those are all in the housing district, right? I heard someone talking about the apartments earlier.

[harepiece]

If you were left to your own time, you wouldn't leave the apartment for anything besides business.

[Which he says with complete confidence, like he KNOWS THIS FOR A FACT. Mostly because, yeah, basically.]

[cheats]

[ Ciel just stares right back at him with a flat expression of his own. ]

And? I'd at least get my work done.

[harepiece]

[A ROCK INDEED. A fancy frilly Victorian rock... But at the explanation, it isn't really America's name or country or believes or anything that strikes him as familiar, but the explanation of being a personified country. That has his expression lighting up almost right away.]

Oh! You must be from the same world that Belgium is from, in that case. Is that right? [There's a certain measure of fondness in his voice at that, because HAVING YOUR LIFE TIED TO SOMEONE can really do a lot to force hyperspeed bonding between two people...]

It's exciting to meet more of you! What name do you go by, then? Just America? Is it Mr. America? [SO EXCITED.

That said, the explanation doesn't seem to sit poorly with Oz at all. It... it would be nice if he was just a tiny little dude, basically, so he'll live with that label in relative good cheer. He does sober up a little for the topic though, and contain his MEETING A NEW NATION sparkles...]

Do you really think that they would do it all just for amusement, though? I mean, it's a good theory! You might be right. It just seems like a lot of effort for a group of people to go through just because they're bored, doesn't it?

[harepiece]

No tomatoes? That's fine. [A nod; he's already planning out what to make, even though like 99% of the things that he thinks up are... desserts... The side-effect of having a horrible sweet tooth.]

I'll come find you again as soon as I have something good!

[harepiece]

[tHAT'S IT.]

I hereby decree that you must leave the apartment with me at least once a day from this day on!

[cheats]

I refuse your decree.

[ He even turns his nose in the air like the haughty brat he is. ]

[changeably]

I see.

[He nods and crosses his arms, looking very serious.]

In that case, you and I must get to know one another better! That way, you will at least know one person here.

[harepiece]

You can refuse it, but for every day that you do, that's a day I can do whatever I want to make up for it!

[PREPARE YOURSELF, CIEL. Courtesy doesn't apply in times of war...]

The first counter-decree is that I'm not sharing my desserts.

[cheats]

[ These two actual children... Ciel has a moment where he thinks about countering the counter-decree with a counter-counter-decree, but also decides that's stupid, thankfully. So instead, he just settles for staring back at Oz as if he's grown another head. ]

You're serious about this? Why?

[cheats]

[ Rather than answer the question, Bughilda rounds the corner, and Ciel turns easily and shoots, hitting "her" squarely between the eyes, though it doesn't quite stop her because of that carapace, but it at least slows her. Ciel barely even misses a beat with running, just continuing forward as he looks for either an exit or a place to hide. ]

Don't patronize me by treating me like a child.

[ Even though he totally is one, but. ]

It's necessary.