« 005 ⇢ event005.exe »

[reparator]

Who: CERES & you
When: IC: 10/04 | OOC: 11/15
Where: ViViD & McCERES
What: Intro Log
Rating/Warning: PG-13 | slightly nsfw

//event005.EXE Learning is Fundamental! Let's play CERESLearn ViViD's usual worlds are unfortunately down for maintenance. While CERES' programmers work on getting it back up and running, all new entrees this round will be going through a different level than usual. Only a single world is accessible at the moment, a simple one entitled 'CERESLearn.' "What the $%@& is this?" you must be thinking. Well, it's simple! It's a study program, of course! CERES' advanced AI technology is here to make sure you learn and that you learn sexily. Whether or not you pay attention to the actual content is up to you, the player. Please enjoy it while it lasts. They're here to teach you a variety of subjects and also to make you feel vaguely uncomfortable all over. New arrivals and those logging into ViViD will first find themselves in a classroom with a new operator greeting them rather than Vidia. "Greetings and welcome to Cerealia! It's nice of you to join us at last. As you can see, we're just about to get started! Here are the instructions: ♥ Choose your subject of choice. They include things like medicine, math, CERES economics, CERES history, fun facts about Julius, engineering, and science! ♥ Choose your tutor. You can hire Astor, Hilda, or UN-Zippy ♥ They'll teach you slowly, deliberately, sensually. Then after that, they'll drill you hard and without stopping. ♥ Just when you think you've had enough, they'll quiz you all over until you're sweating and panting. ♥ For those of you who pass, you'll be welcomed well into Cerealia and be given a free voucher for a McCERES Mildly Content meal. Please enjoy!"

//SCENARIOS.EXE PHASE I [ xxxx ] Once you choose your lesson and your tutor, you will be transported to a classroom where you and a few other players who decide to choose the same lesson will sit with your tutor after school, getting knowledge taught to you by someone who seems more intent on learning what's under your clothes than filling your head with knowledge. They will be awkwardly stretching, dropping pencils by 'accident' on the floor, and bending down slowly to pick them up. Certain things might be spilling out of their clothes. Awkward things. They will breathe down your neck and make sure you are well-versed in their anatomy by the end of the lesson. Fortunately, it won't last long as their bodies start to flicker erratically. PHASE II [ xxxx ] Just as things begin to escalate, the flickering will grow intense until your tutor will start to morph before your eyes. What takes their place is something that is anything but friendly. And yes, it will continue to breathe down your neck and speak in a sweet, soft, alluring voice while reaching out with its 'hands' to try and touch you. This will be your cue to run through the halls of the school while That Thing chases you in every single direction imaginable. There will be others joining you as everyone starts bolting out of their classrooms. PHASE III [ xxxx ] Feeling tired already? Well, don't stop and rest now! For those who successfully murder their own tutor, they will get their food voucher and a lovely welcome into CERES. You've officially passed! Everyone will be allowed to mingle around the game room in the CERES Research Tower before being directed into McCERES just across the street. For those who were already in the colony, you will also receive a voucher and directions to McCERES at the end of the game in case you want to go meet up with the newcomers there or just eat some artery-killing fast food. PHASE IV [ xxxx ] For those who get eaten by That Thing or don't pass their quizzes and upset their tutors, they will be forced to endure the Price of Failure. This means being sent to the gym with the other 'failures' to endure a painfully slow and erotic striptease by UN-Zippy. Once that is over, they will then be logged out and allowed to have their complimentary McCERES voucher. BONUS [ whyo'clock ] Congratulations on surviving CERESLearn! Here's your complimentary voucher for a free Mildly Content Meal at McCERES. This month's special is also the McKnight Burger. Characters are immediately invited to take a load off and enjoy some good ol' fashion fast food of questionable origin. Those who decide to order and eat here will also get a special toy included inside their Mildly Content Meals. [ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ]

//RUN.EXE Welcome to CEREALIA's latest intro post. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's usual arrival experience (which is not entirely applicable this round for reasons stated above^) and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!

Comments

[allweather]

[Hopefully no one is that incompetent... Reim's expression drops instantly to a flat one; he's not even close to impressed by that excuse.]

How original. In that case, it's best to go forward under the assumption we're on our own as far as figuring things out goes.

[....] Interruptions from their machines notwithstanding.

[deontology]

[Next event, watch, it'll happen again. "SORRY I WANTED TO HELP BUT IT WAS UNDERWEAR WASHING DAY". Sousei's onto them.]

... Indeed. We have a mostly unified goal at the moment, though that may not be enough to keep everyone working together in the future.

[allweather]

[Well, clean underwear is at least important--]

We can worry about that when it becomes a problem. If it isn't yet, let's not give anyone ideas about getting in the way of progress.

[deontology]

[true enough, true enough. As irritated as he has been over the past month, he's at least glad that there are more sensible people here now.]

Indeed. It may never be an issue.

[just....heavily unlikely that they'll never get people who are contrary just for the sake of being contrary.]

Regardless, Julius Vincere is the name of the man in charge here. It may help with your inquiries. [to go to the source and all, though he's also....about the same as Sousei is used to politicians being.]

[allweather]

[There's an easy way to deal with those people, and that is ignoring them blatantly. It sometimes works, too.

Reim nods, meanwhile, and jots down the name.] I believe they mentioned him during the presentation... Is he often available?

[deontology]

["Available"........ hm. Maybe if Sousei believed things could be resolved via phone calls but. Ha.]

He can be contacted, but I would not say he's "available".

[Take from that what you will.]

[allweather]

[A strongly-worded letter, maybe...]

Ah. Um- Does he not take his own messages...?

[Seriously Sousei, that's a total nonanswer. Is he delegating everything to his secretary?? What's happening here.]

[deontology]

[please send him a strongly-worded letter. On the oldest parchment you can find. Written with a quill pen.

But it's something he hasn't quite figured out for himself, okay!!]

The only way he apparently may be contacted is via these devices. [which is bs as far as he's concerned.] There are no face-to-face meetings. Should things not go his way, he will often direct calls to other employees.

[hence-- he can be contacted, but he's definitely not present.]

[allweather]

[There will be calligraphy. He's good at it.]

I see... Well, that's a start. He'll take messages sooner or later.

[Reim is prepared to be That Guy who calls every day until he gets what he wants. No one will keep him from exchanging his Peach Bellinis...]

[deontology]

[... hm. Not really his thing, but it's not a bad thing at all. He certainly gets the sense that Reim is great at Being a Pest for Customer Service.]

...I look forward to seeing your progress.

[Good luck, Reim, he's rooting for your behind the lineface.]