« 005 ⇢ event005.exe »

[reparator]

Who: CERES & you
When: IC: 10/04 | OOC: 11/15
Where: ViViD & McCERES
What: Intro Log
Rating/Warning: PG-13 | slightly nsfw

//event005.EXE Learning is Fundamental! Let's play CERESLearn ViViD's usual worlds are unfortunately down for maintenance. While CERES' programmers work on getting it back up and running, all new entrees this round will be going through a different level than usual. Only a single world is accessible at the moment, a simple one entitled 'CERESLearn.' "What the $%@& is this?" you must be thinking. Well, it's simple! It's a study program, of course! CERES' advanced AI technology is here to make sure you learn and that you learn sexily. Whether or not you pay attention to the actual content is up to you, the player. Please enjoy it while it lasts. They're here to teach you a variety of subjects and also to make you feel vaguely uncomfortable all over. New arrivals and those logging into ViViD will first find themselves in a classroom with a new operator greeting them rather than Vidia. "Greetings and welcome to Cerealia! It's nice of you to join us at last. As you can see, we're just about to get started! Here are the instructions: ♥ Choose your subject of choice. They include things like medicine, math, CERES economics, CERES history, fun facts about Julius, engineering, and science! ♥ Choose your tutor. You can hire Astor, Hilda, or UN-Zippy ♥ They'll teach you slowly, deliberately, sensually. Then after that, they'll drill you hard and without stopping. ♥ Just when you think you've had enough, they'll quiz you all over until you're sweating and panting. ♥ For those of you who pass, you'll be welcomed well into Cerealia and be given a free voucher for a McCERES Mildly Content meal. Please enjoy!"

//SCENARIOS.EXE PHASE I [ xxxx ] Once you choose your lesson and your tutor, you will be transported to a classroom where you and a few other players who decide to choose the same lesson will sit with your tutor after school, getting knowledge taught to you by someone who seems more intent on learning what's under your clothes than filling your head with knowledge. They will be awkwardly stretching, dropping pencils by 'accident' on the floor, and bending down slowly to pick them up. Certain things might be spilling out of their clothes. Awkward things. They will breathe down your neck and make sure you are well-versed in their anatomy by the end of the lesson. Fortunately, it won't last long as their bodies start to flicker erratically. PHASE II [ xxxx ] Just as things begin to escalate, the flickering will grow intense until your tutor will start to morph before your eyes. What takes their place is something that is anything but friendly. And yes, it will continue to breathe down your neck and speak in a sweet, soft, alluring voice while reaching out with its 'hands' to try and touch you. This will be your cue to run through the halls of the school while That Thing chases you in every single direction imaginable. There will be others joining you as everyone starts bolting out of their classrooms. PHASE III [ xxxx ] Feeling tired already? Well, don't stop and rest now! For those who successfully murder their own tutor, they will get their food voucher and a lovely welcome into CERES. You've officially passed! Everyone will be allowed to mingle around the game room in the CERES Research Tower before being directed into McCERES just across the street. For those who were already in the colony, you will also receive a voucher and directions to McCERES at the end of the game in case you want to go meet up with the newcomers there or just eat some artery-killing fast food. PHASE IV [ xxxx ] For those who get eaten by That Thing or don't pass their quizzes and upset their tutors, they will be forced to endure the Price of Failure. This means being sent to the gym with the other 'failures' to endure a painfully slow and erotic striptease by UN-Zippy. Once that is over, they will then be logged out and allowed to have their complimentary McCERES voucher. BONUS [ whyo'clock ] Congratulations on surviving CERESLearn! Here's your complimentary voucher for a free Mildly Content Meal at McCERES. This month's special is also the McKnight Burger. Characters are immediately invited to take a load off and enjoy some good ol' fashion fast food of questionable origin. Those who decide to order and eat here will also get a special toy included inside their Mildly Content Meals. [ Remember to apply proper warnings on threads with trigger-y or inappropriate material and do let a mod know if your thread careens off into maiming or canoodling so we can lock the log. ]

//RUN.EXE Welcome to CEREALIA's latest intro post. For your convenience, we have compiled a post detailing everyone's usual arrival experience (which is not entirely applicable this round for reasons stated above^) and a FAQ that should explain everything in more detail. Please read them thoroughly before playing. Thank you!

Comments

[rollin]

[ it's true ]

Well fuck, it ain't my fault you're shit with telling shit from other shit, shithead!

[ Families are looking on in horror as they cover the ears of their young ones. ]

I know what I said!

[bigstick]

You're the one talkin' about shit filled with other shit! If you're gonna say that kind of shit, don't give the example maybe it's space shit. Give like, a legitimate one! Like... shit! I thought you meant shit! Most people would give a example, you shit. I mean, shit, at least say alien beef.

[ this is really happening and they're probably going to get kicked out eventually ]

[rollin]

[ HE SUDDENLY GRABS HIS COLLAR ]

It ain't beef if it ain't from Earth, dumbass.

[bigstick]

[ GRABS.... HIS COLLAR BACK..... and sneers at him a little too ]

Yeah, and you can say that 'cause you're some sorta cow expert?

[ this is a way too intense a conversation over beef ]

[rollin]

All I know is THERE'S NO COWS IN SPACE, YOU FUCKING—

[ He's about to punch America, but a couple of guards grab Yata's arms and pull him away and towards the exit. ]

Aah, leggo! Lemme at 'im!

[ And there he goes out the door. He's been all sorts of stressed lately. Walk it off, Yata. Walk it off... ]

[bigstick]

[ well, that escalated quickly. as soon as yata's pulled off him, america just drops down in his seat with a mildly surprised look. people around him are still staring yet all he does is pick up a fry and pop it in his mouth. ]

Geez, what was up with that guy, right?

[ ha. ha ha ha. casually he goes back to his burger and within a few seconds, everyone else goes back to their meals. see you, yata..... ]