semi-open

[cardboard_journalism]

Who: cardboard_journalism & the people around her
When: January 31st, morning
Where: Different places around Cerealia
What: Myriam Scuttlebutt's newspaper, 5th edition!
Rating/Warning: (possibly some PG content?)

---

[ January 31st... Every week was becoming an adventure, and this one marked one very special difference from the ones before.

Scuttlebutt thought she might actually have NEWS.

Therefore, this edition was going to be all business. She labored through the night to get the formatting in the right order, but by morning she had enough stacks of newsprint to start distributing the paper.

Hand-truck in... hand, it was going to be a long morning. ]



A. OTA

[ Myriam Scuttlebutt, wearing her cardboard box, carries a stack of bundles of The Cerealia Times in a cardboard box on a hand-truck. Slight difference from usual in that she doesn't try to persuade the businesses to take them today, she just outright makes a space and sets a stack down.

Who is this crazy cardboard box girl? Or, if you've seen her before, what is the box girl up to? Maybe if you ask her you'll find out! ]

B. OTA

[ Myriam Scuttlebutt, wearing her cardboard box, sits behind a register at the School Supply Store she works at. She rings people up seriously and then hands them a copy of the paper with their purchase, even if they don't ask for it or try to give it back. ]

C. Either/or!

[ No interaction with Scuttlebutt herself, just read the paper and post your own reaction wherever they may be! Maybe leave her a comment on her inbox or go track her down to complain with another prompt. The paper can definitely be found at Archer's food-stand, Thistle Do Nicely flower-tea shop, The Little Sister cosplay cafe, the Arcade, and the Opera House. ]

---

[ It looks, feels, and smells, like a newspaper, and the top above-the-fold part of the paper reads as follows ]




"seriously, i could go at anytime"

Date: January 31th, ? year. Price: Free



SECRET CERES DOCUMENTS!
byline: Myriam Scuttlebutt

January 26th, many Cerealians glanced down at their portable CERES-provided communication things to find something rarer than unicorn's teeth. An invite to a previously unopen to the public CERES Research Tower.

"This link will bring you to a listing to make an appointment," said Mosley, no last name given, the CERES' official PR representative. And make an appointment many people did.

What details would emerge? Would CERES' turn out to be the monolithic shady corporation its image had cultivated itself, or would this supposed "Research Tower" turn out to be nothing more than a paper front with a hole cut out in the back with a sign saying: "j/k! lol".

The answer turns out to be: somewhere in between.

The tour began innocently enough, with Mosley, no last name given, openly complaining about his job and the "ungrateful" nature of the relocated Cerealians. Stating: "sometimes [I] just... ...wish [I] could take a break!"

As if the building itself answered his pleas, he proceeded to fall down an elevator shaft.

This reporter, along with Inaba, and several other very helpful individuals whose names have been withheld to protect their anonymity, had the happenstance to happen upon what should have been the greatest stock of information related to CERES: the physical documents room.

Sadly, most of these were immediately destroyed in a very convenient fire.

BUT NOT BEFORE THIS REPORTER GOT SOME CAMERA-SHOTS OF THEM!

Here they are, with summations.

Page1: This page consists of a legal document that documents the sale for Tellus by Julius Vincere, as well as the purchase of CERES by Bellona Recreare from Julius Vincere. It's very official looking, despite the apparent lack of loopholes.

We shall investigate these further with our legal experts.

Page2: The following is an excerpt from a brief history of the CERES corporation, written by the CERES corporation for people working for the CERES corporation. It should therefore be taken with a slight grain of salt. There are passages on how Julius Vincere is an altruistic savior, how they're doing work to save the galaxy, and how the purchase of the planet Tellus marked the beginning of a new chapter in CERES history.

Perhaps most interesting is a bizarre lack of any mention of the dreaded "flamines" menace.

Page3: This is a page of a technical scientific document. While the language is a bit impenetrable, a consultation with a local expert on scientific matters revealed that these are surveys regarding the sale of some unquantifiable substance that is in high demand around the galaxy. Key words that appear over and over are "wireless energy transfers" and "high-substance converters".

What sort of energy is this? Is it a cook book? Is Soylent Green made out of people?

We'll have to find out, and when we find out, YOU will find out!

[ The below-the-fold story reads: ]




Local delinquent Ryuko Matoi arrested.
byline: Myriam Scuttlebutt

Armed with a so-called "scissor blade," Ryuko Matoi allegedly injured several by-standers, destroyed a large amount of private property, and kicked at least one pet cybuddy. Automated police-bots caught up to Miss Matoi hours later on her way home from school, where she surrendered quietly after tearing apart at least three patrol-bots with the aforementioned "scissor blade" and one unidentified bystander was killed by decapitation. No trial has yet been scheduled to this reporter's knowledge, but surely there must be some hot defense attorney out there willing to take her case! Even if the outcome doesn't look good. There's eye-witnesses and photographic evidence.

Such as this one, which was provided to The Cerealia Times.



Ryuko Matoi was not available to give a quote in her defense because of a denied request for a meeting by prison officials.

Anyone with further details is recommended to contact the local police, possibly through Miles Edgeworth, or Sir Integra Hellsing.

[ Next page is Obituaries. ]



Mosley, no-last-name-given... not dead?
byline: Myriam Scuttlebutt

During the tour to the CERES Research Tower, PR representative Mosley no-last-name-given fell down an open elevator shaft, apparently plummeting to his death.

This apparently was not enough to make him alter his health, lifestyle, or career choices, as he appeared some time later to escort those on the tour out of the building, refusing to answer any questions on his apparent status of immortality. Is this good or bad news for CERES? Only time will tell!

[ "Weather: Cold. Air quality: not-the-best." ]

[ There's a section titled: "MUSIC". In it, space has been allocated to Jakuzure Nonon. A photo of her conducting is here.

The article, byline Nonon Jakuzure, chides the readers for their taste in "modern pop music," and suggests that if they really want to listen to something they consider embarrassing, they should consider "Entry of the Gladiators" by Czech composer Julius Fučík. It is a piece that is "more dignified than you will ever be, peon." ]

[ Next section is:

HOROSCOPES: by Myriam Scuttlebutt (temporarily).

♈ Aries (3/21 - 4/19); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♉ Taurus (4/20 - 5/20); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♊ Gemini (5/21 - 6/21); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♋ Cancer (6/22 - 7/22); Your hard work is paying off! Keep at it!

♌ Leo (7/23 - 8/22); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♍ Virgo (8/23 - 9/22); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♎ Libra (9/23 - 10/22); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♏ Scorpio (10/23 - 11/21); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♐ Sagittarius (11/22 - 12/21); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♑ Capricorn (12/22 - 1/19); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♒ Aquarius (1/20 - 2/18); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times.

♓ Pisces (2/19 - 3/20); You should read the top stories of the Cerealia Times. ]

[Next section is:

Love Advice ♥ with Miss Maggie

Reprint from last week. Please submit more questions for love advice for Miss Maggie!

There have been a few questions pertaining to dating and sadly, I wasn't able to answer them all in the last column. Rather than answering them with similar responses, I decided that for this column I would outline some basic dating tips and ideas to keep in mind! Points that were touched on already: How to ask someone out, where to take them out. For those who missed it, I'll briefly cover them here too!

-When you are asking someone out, you need to make sure you are confident and straightforward!

-Taking a person out is really simple! Traditional options are going to movies or dinner, but picnics, going to the arcade, walks in the park are just as acceptable!

Alright, with that information out of the way, we're going to discuss important tips to help your date go smashingly well! And first on this list is dress code. No matter what kind of date this is, you gotta make sure you look nice. Hopefully I don't have to tell you guys about good hygiene, but just in case please make sure you shower, brush your teeth, and over all are clean and odor free. I cannot stress this enough this is an IMPORTANT STEP!!

-For formal dates, like dinners, you'll want to make sure that you are a little dressier than normal. I'm not saying you need a tuxedo or a ball gown or anything, but make sure you look nice. An evening dress or classy ensemble for the ladies, slacks and a dress shirt for the guys. Tie, bow tie, suspenders all optional. Don't wear hats, okay? Just put your hair up or brush it back, make it look nice.

-More casual dates like picnics, walks in the park, the movies, you can of course dress more casually. But you still gotta look nice! This means you can't wear the ratty jeans with the holes in them. Make sure your clothes are clean and stain/hole free. You probably want to avoid any loud graphics too. Keep it comfortable, but simple! Jeans, a t-shirt, a light jacket over the top for boys is a good example, and jeans or a skirt, a blouse and a sweater for the girls! Feel free to mix it up though, just don't over dress.

Next up is conversation! Since you're looking to get to know each other, don't be scared to ask them questions. "What is your favorite color?" "What kind of food do you like?" "How do you feel about dogs/cats/pigs?" Knowing some basic info is a great place to start learning how you mesh together! You also want to keep the conversation moving and light, especially if you're the one who asked the other person out! Here are some suggestions:

-Talk about each other's jobs! Jobs are a great way to share experiences, learn more about each other and learn about things like future plans!
-Ask them about movies, media, games and things! These kinds of interests are not only good to know so you can find common ground, but can help you for future date ideas if a second date is in the cards!

Conversation topics you should AVOID on the first date:

-The weather. This is saved for people you are just meeting and is too simple. Usually leads to a boring conversation! (Unless you're magic and can control it!!)
-Family. Sometimes this can be a really private subject, so it's probably better to save this for the second date instead!

Also, try not to sit there and talk all about yourself and your interests and things only you are interested in. If you are all about "me, me, me," your partner won't be very interested in you, you, you for very long. Be open and be interested in them! Listen to their stories, laugh at their jokes, show them you care!

And that's all for now! Hopefully this advice will help you out in your romantic adventures!

[ there's a note that requests for love advice can be submitted anonymously or not to Myriam Scuttlebutt's inbox. ]

[ Next section is labeled: "Letters to the Editor"

No letters were submitted this week. We welcome all opinions regarding The Cerealia Times and other current events. Let us know your opinions!

For the record, The Cerealia Times does not print "rough drafts" of the newspaper, or any individual articles, for review by any outside authority of any kind. This is non-negotiable. Stop asking.

-Editor, Myriam Scuttlebutt." ]

[ The next section is titled:

"GOSSIP"

There is a simple note that says:

"Miss Tattler's column does not appear this week. Stay tuned for Miss Tattler's possible return." ]

[ Next page is dedicated to "Missing Persons" and reads as follows:

"An unverified person styling themselves "Lord" Cain C. Hargreaves is searching for his butler, a mister Riff Raffit. He is described as "quite tall, broad-shouldered, with fair hair and blue eyes, probably wearing a well-pressed suit in blue or gray. He's left-handed, strongly built and maddeningly altruistic."

Riff Raffit is of such reportedly high character he is likely to be seen "...rescuing a kitten from a tree, aiding a gentlewoman with her garden or teaching underprivileged children how to box." Any reports should be addressed to "Lord" Cain C. Hargreaves. No reward has been offered for this information. Mr. Hargreaves has expressed that as his employer, he is considering docking Mr. Raffit's paycheck."

"Friends are searching for beloved pillar of the community Apollo Justice, pictured here: . Mr. Justice has been missing since yesterday morning and various persons are just worried sick about him. Please report all information to Athena Cykes."

"Local Rock Lee is searching for several missing people:

Sakura Haruno
Natalia Luzu Kimlasca-Lanvaldear
Rin Tohsaka

Anyone with information is directed to contact Mr. Lee at..." [and there's a link to Rock Lee's inbox written out.] ]




Missing Weiss Schnee found! Will there be more disappearances?
byline: Myriam Scuttlebutt

Local missing Weiss Schnee recently reappeared after her sudden disappearance a few weeks prior. Miss Schnee gave no explanation for her disappearance. She was quoted as saying: "I'm afraid I couldn't tell you. One minute I was here, minding my own business, the next I wake up to that absurd presentation again."

Her experiences are at odds with Cerealia TImes reporter Inaba Himeko who disappeared suddenly only to re-emerge later with tales that she had returned to her previous world, interacted with others there, then returned to us here at Tellus. What is the pattern? Will there be more disappearances? If you have been affected by any such thing, please report your story immediately!

[ Below is a box which reads: "Want to print a message in The Cerealia Times? We print announcements, statements, job advertisements, etc! Contact..." (and there's a text reading of the link to Scuttlebutt's inbox.) ]

[ The following positions are listed:

Publisher: Myriam Scuttlebutt
Editor: Myriam Scuttlebutt
Lead Reporter: Leia Rolando
Reporter: Myriam Scuttlebutt
Reporter: Inaba Himeko
Photojournalist: Myriam Scuttlebutt
Correspondent: Myriam Scuttlebutt
Gossip columnist: Miss Tattler
Music columnist: Nonon Jakuzure
Horoscopes: Pearl Fey
Love Advice columnist: Miss Maggie

It specifies that letters to the editor can be delivered in person to Myriam Scuttlebutt. (No details of where or who she is.) ]

[ Another blurb reads: "Story sources and employees wanted! Inquire at..." (and there's a text reading of the link to Scuttlebutt's inbox.) ]

[ A final blurb reads: "Did we get it wrong? If you wish to correct a factual statement, leave your correction at..." (and there's a text reading of the link to Scuttlebutt's inbox.) ]

[OOC: journaler or dereban are free to comment to this post with any further articles or details they wish to give about their character's content in the newspaper.]

Comments

ota; plus more articles...

[dereban]

[ This was a lot of stuff to read. Of course, most of this she had known already stuff she knew beforehand, but it's fine. Of course, Inaba had written some articles herself, mostly dealing with the existence of the Flamines, specifically talking about whether or not they were real or fake along with providing several images that she took herself on the history books and the sheer lack of Flamines, as was stated in the front page.

There's also an image of this creature that she managed to take luckily along with a brief message talking about how safe CERES really is and wondering if they're actually doing their "job".

And last but not least, Inaba's managed to put out something about eyesight problems happening during the tour along with the "They are here, watching, through you. They always have been." message that was quoted by a mysterious female non-human with sharp claws, going on to suggest that CERES may have put something in them without telling them.

In any case, Inaba will be out and about passing newspapers this time around, it's important, and she needs to get the word out to as many people ASAP. And this is also her chance to get to tell people about the possible discussion / meeting that they're having soon, too. ]

[cardboard_journalism]

[they'd probably meet in the morning somewhere in the district for Scuttlebutt to hand off papers to her, then]

"Eyesight problems," eh? I don't remember feeling that, myself... but I had them shut after a while. Kahk kahk kahk...

[dereban]

I didn't have that problem, but another group had that happen to all of them all at once.

[cardboard_journalism]

Wow... What brought that on? Kahk kahk...

[shikisha]

1 - to anybody around!

That can't be true!!

[ This is becoming a sort of regular scene here at the cafe near Nonon's work at the Opera House. She had just seen her girlfriend the other night, and now supposedly she'd killed someone?! ...Unless it was...

No, even Ryuko wouldn't just decapitate Nui, and if she did she'd probably just explode like all other Life Fiber clothes did. But this can't be what really happened. Not even Ryuko Matoi is that dumb to do something like that.

...Without telling her.

Nonon just stares at the picture, grabbing at the newspaper hard enough to rip chunks out of it, feeling her blood boiling. ]

2 - closed to myriam

[ After reading the newspaper, Nonon forgoes calling Myriam, instead throwing opening the door to her store with a crash. She's furious. Obviously. ]

Cardboard!! Where the hell are you?! What the fuck is going on here?!

3 - a network post

IF ANYONE KNOWS WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED WITH RYUKO MATOI LAST NIGHT REPLY ASAP

1

[zenryokuzenkai]

[ Nanoha lands in front of Nonon, newspaper in hand, and she's clearly worried, which is quite a feat: Nanoha rarely lets negative emotion show. ]

Nonon-chan! I read the paper and I flew here as quickly as I could. I don't believe Ryuko-chan would do anything like!

[shikisha]

[ Ah, it's her mom. Magical Mom. Nonon's almost barely surprised to see her here, but it kind of is reassuring to have someone worried about this too. ]

Of course she didn't!

[ Well, that's not exactly true. ]

There's got to be a reason here! Maybe it was just Nui, that bitch deserves to die. But there's definitely something wrong!

[zenryokuzenkai]

I don't know who this Nui is, and maybe Ryuko would try to kill her, [ Nanoha's against killing anyone by principle herself, ] but decapitating innocent bystanders? I definitely won't believe that!

[ Nanoha grabs Nonon's hand, holding it tight. ]

Don't do anything stupid, okay? We'll prove her innocence and get her out.

1

[keep_hope_alive]

[The newspaper usually was entertaining, but this particular issue left him feeling a little bothered. Not to mention concerned.

He makes a bee line to Nonon's workplace, the Opera house, just in time to watch her react to the paper. That's not good.

He approaches just enough so she can see him, but not enough to maybe incur her wrath.]

[shikisha]

You!!

You and me are going to the police station to figure out what the hell is going on here!

[ She doesn't ask, she doesn't wait, she's already angrily crumpling the newspaper into a ball, and throwing it at the trash barrel. ]

[keep_hope_alive]

Okay.

[A beat.]

But you let me do the talking. If you say something they could use against miss Matoi, you can bet they would.

2

[cardboard_journalism]

Kaaaaahk!

[OH GAWD, WAS THE WORLD ENDING?]

[oh wait, no... it was just Nonon] [She stood up and waited for her to march over]

Don't shout through the store, miss. I'm right here.

[shikisha]

[ THATS RUDE

But only half as rude as what Nonon's actually mad about. She pushes someone out of the way right righteous indignation, slapping the clearly crumpled newspaper in her hand on the counter in front of Myriam. ]

What the hell is this?! You wrote about her without even telling me first that she was in trouble?!

[cardboard_journalism]

[Scuttlebutt briefly considered giving her a new uncrumpled sheet, but then Nonon started talking]

What? Kahk kahk kahk. You mean you didn't know...?

...Well, either way, yes! There's nothing else I know that isn't in that article, so that's it.

OTA? She's probably hanging out at the cosplay cafe.

[zenryokuzenkai]

[ Nanoha's reading the paper with some interest. There's no real new information about CERES in the top story, given that Nanoha was actually there and definitely fought the shadow monster, but it helps to get Myriam and Inaba's perspectives.

She wonders what Ribbons thinks of this, and if there's any way to get to him? He seemed like a rather private person.

Far more of interest to her is the second story. She had only met Ryuko a handful of times, but Nanoha considered her a friend. They'd fought together, and she was Nonon's girlfriend, so how could she be anything else? But Nanoha's worries surely didn't compare to Nonon's... ]

I should call her?

[cardboard_journalism]

"Her?" You mean, Ryuko? Not sure, but they might've taken away her CERES-device thing. Or maybe her access to it.

[zenryokuzenkai]

Ah, Myriam. You're the one who writes these, aren't you? Good job. [ Mostly. Praise where it's due. What's up with those horoscopes though, those were never accurate but they're clearly rigged this week. ]

No, I might visit Ryuko and see what happened, but I was thinking of calling Nonon. She has to be devastated with her partner jailed.

[cardboard_journalism]

Sss, sss, sss! The paper is a collaboration of many talented individuals! I just organize it a bit.

[Getting a chance to show how humble she could be made her heart swell with pride]

Well, if you get in and discover anything else, let me know! Not sure they'll let anyone in... I think her alleged crime was pretty severe by Cerealia standards. Kaaahk.

T-Thanks also for your help back there in that tower... y'know?

open, some cafe somewhere

[faithfulflame]

[Sitting in a café somewhere, the first thing that hits Rei about this article is how the first part is phrased, like some sort of bizarre tabloid. The second thing is the mugshot.

Her teacup drops, shattering on the table as she reads on.

Property damage? Kicking Cybuddies? That all sounded plausible. But shredding patrolbots and decapitating bystanders? That was something else entirely. It didn’t sound a whit like her friend.]

W-What is this? This is such…this cannot be accurate in the slightest.

[Even that delinquent had to have more sense than that.]

[swordboning]

[May as well be at Archer's or something because he stocks this crap.]

Of course not. That idiot would sooner die than hurt someone innocent. No, I have my own personal theory.

[faithfulflame]

[May as well.]

And what's that theory?

[swordboning]

[He created a sword and placed it on the table.

Well, actually, it was a scissor blade.]

Look at it. This was supposedly the weapon of choice. As I'm not one to trust photographic evidence and there's no actual witness testimony, I have one thing to go on.

Namely, this was the primary bit of evidence. Except, from both the design and the name, there's no doubt that a second one of these exists.

[cardboard_journalism]

[whoa, it was tea-cup shatteringly good news. Scuttlebutt knew she had a winner]

Well, it is. I don't print lies, you know. It gets complicated legally. Sss, sss, sss.

[faithfulflame]

[Rei...looks over at the box. And blinks.]

You printed this?

[cardboard_journalism]

Sss, sss, sss! See the byline? Myriam Scuttlebutt: Ace Reporter and Editor, at your service!

[she spun her pen pridefully]

Do you like it?