You know what everyone needs after rampant robotic attacks and another iteration of clone wars? A vacation! That’s right everyone, you deserve this. CERES understands what you need. CERES is here for you all the time, so never doubt that this is a pleasure colony, and they are here to look after all of your needs. Kick your feet up, relax, and let CERES Recreation and Activity Necessity Keepers (Team RANK, that is) set you up with your ideal getaway.
It’s as if you can sense the incoming relaxation and luxury before you even completely finish loading. There’s the warmth encompassing your entire body as your code gets transferred into this particular ViViD Level. A cool, refreshing breeze hits you. The sounds of waves gently lapping against the coast fill you with relaxation. The sun, the sand, the surfs, it’s all there – welcome to the beach, baby!
An echoing greeting message from the ocean comes next, if you can translate it.
 OOOOOOOOOOOOHMAHH GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHD.
YOOOOOOOOOOOORRRALL SOOOOOOOOOOOOO KYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT.
KYOOOOOOOOOOOT EEEENAAAAUUUUUUUF TOOOOOOOOOOOOO EEEEEEEEEEEEEEET.
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PHASE I [ 08 00 ] That said, isn’t that breeze a little… too strong? It feels like it’s brushing up against all of you, if you know what I mean. When you open your eyes and look down, it becomes rather clear why. It seems that you’ve found yourself in some pretty interesting attire. Everyone. No exceptions. You appear to have two options – be overcome and scream like the Victorian maiden your heart says you are, or strut like a model in this stuff. Turn some heads! Work that up do!
But don’t worry, we’re also conscious about safety here at CERES! Therefore everyone’s also been provided a pair of super high-tech safety-tested appendage protection floatation devices (STAPFD for short.)
At least everyone around you is caught in the same sort of attire – and everyone around you also appears to be stuck inside a giant sand castle. It’s entirely malleable to what you want it to be! Want to see a fancy sand bidet? Feel like adding a sand statue in your honor? Think that wall should now be a door? Well, with enough perseverance, you can make it happen!
Just uh, be careful about getting sand in your… everywhere.
PHASE II [ 1000 ] Someone broke it. Not pointing any fingers, even though you sure do seem like a prime suspect, but someone broke it.
It almost starts like an earthquake with how the castle starts to rumble, the sand shaking right beneath your feet. And then the walls right next to you start to cave in followed promptly by the ceiling right… above your head. Oh dear. The sand starts to run and fall, losing its structure and shape. The hallway behind you starts to cave in, ceiling first and then the walls follow suit. Now the sand really is getting everywhere – but not just uncomfortable places. It’s in your hair, your eyes, your nose…. this sure doesn’t seem like a pleasant way to go!
Best to start running – there’s a trusty drawbridge to get over the moat (because what’s a sandcastle without a moat?) but who knows how long until that, too, is going to give way? Best to cross over it before it starts to shake and disappear too. Or if you don’t make it, hopefully you can land some pretty impressive airtime to make it to the other side!
If not, well...there'll be the sensation of sand crushing down upon you, filling your mouth and eyes, and you won't be able to breathe at all – and then you're alive again on the beach (but possibly in yet another new, uncomfortable, skimpy swimsuit). Honestly, be more careful, would you?
PHASE III [ 1200 ] However, once you do make it to the other side, it’s all smooth sailing from there! Or is it? Hah, as they say, life sure can be a beach.
Which is what this is.
Welcome to your Beach Episode, folks. Now that you’ve made it out of the collapsing sand castle, you’ve made it to the luxurious, picturesque golden coastline. Sure, you’re coughing up fine, luxurious, sand dust right now and you’ve definitely gotten sand in all of your crevices thanks to your swimsuit, but that’s okay! Go take a soak in the ocean or something or cool off with a smoothie. There’s a smoothie shack off into the distance, complete with a long chalkboard with… well, probably a few familiar names? And some unfamiliar ingredients. Sounds appetizing right?
That said, once you do ingest some of the smoothie with the name of a newcomer, you might suddenly find yourself feeling a bit… different. You’ll be taking on some of their traits, one of the most intense parts of their personality – or you might need to take a second to sit down because you’re suddenly seeing one of their memories. Whoa. What do they actually put in this stuff?
PHASE IV [ 1500 ] For the brave souls that venture out into the water, you have even more adventures waiting for you. Anyone who’s swimming around, wading in the water—hell, even looking at the water is getting scooped up and deposited in one of these giant orbs. But don’t take up too much room, because someone else is getting shoved right in there with you. Time to get cozy with your new friend, because it's only going to get worse as the waves begin to carry you out into this big, blue, virtual ocean. Hopefully the choppy waves don’t bounce you around too much or – well, you could always get really friendly with a stranger! Why not?
At least until it’s made very clear that fresh air does not make it back into these balls. That seems like a bit of a design flaw. Now what? Fight the other person who’s inhaling all your air? Suffer through it for swimsuit-clad fun? Or if you break it…. well, you sure are stranded out in the ocean. Or are you?
After enough flailing, you’ll be met by a giant, dumb-looking creature who will then eat you whole.
Everything goes dark. This is surely the end --
And then you're in Cerealia proper; it seems that was the exit to the level (but why there?) and you'll find yourself either in one of the fountains or the pond in the park. Either way, you'll be very, very well. And this time, that's not virtual. But hey, at least you'll have all of your stuff with you.
BONUS [ xxxx ] Do you hear that?
Anyone idle on the beach will hear a distant melody coming from further out into the ocean. It’s a beautiful, elegant song that automatically makes the listener stop what they’re doing and immediately wander toward the noise. It takes you a moment to recall – it takes a moment to think about anything now, really – but you remember hearing the smoothie shack owner say something about mermaids populating the beach. Could this be their song calling out to you? Whether you would normally abide by this kind of call or not, you find your feet walking further and further out into the water, the shallows lapping up to your ankles and up and up as you are drawn in by the song.
A rather classic song, though the usual instances of French are also replaced with the very enticing, enchanting nonsense promise of omelette du fromage........and then they try to drown you.
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Also, he's tired. He's tired!! It's not his fault he attracts shenanigans like a magnet. When will he be able to take his well-deserved nap?]
What's that supposed to mean, huh? [Them's fightin' words, bucko... But he'll glance over to the menu to see what he's pointing at and - oh god why, why are there two Soujis up there again he's even more tired now.
But more importantly:] There're definitely still some problems with that one... [WHY SO MANY SALTED PEANUTS. Or the one with shame - apt, though.] Can't you just wait until we're outside to get something to drink? Like, the real outside.
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( So that leaves, what, Kashuu, as the cause? Looks like it! Maybe Heisuke should learn to be careful around this one, even that sandy backfire from last time could have just been a result of standing too close.
Anyway, he should TREASURE these towel goblin days while they last, because that kind of coverage really obscures those Itou-like good looks, which means why should Heisuke listen to you, huh? There's a bit of a shrug though, still seemingly amused at the other's words, and he's going to order anyway against Kashuu's advice. Don't worry, he'll learn the hard way. These big, bad drinks don't scare him!! )
What's the fun in that, though? It's been a while since we've had any chance to relax, and once I get there I'll probably have to get back to work.
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Trust me, they reeeally can. [He could go into a lot of detail here and it would all be really unfortunate details, but he'll be merciful and just leave it at that... If Heisuke wants to poison himself, he's not going to stand in his way!
Except yeah, he probably will, because he's too much of a good bean for his own good. Even if he doesn't have the swaying power of his Itou-like good looks on his side, he still has the ever-present ability to fuss like a cranky baby grandpa.]
What, the city? You won't have to work work. You'll need to get a job, but whatever you were doing back home's gonna have to be put on pause while you're here. So you'll have tons of time to relax if you make room for it, and you won't even have to down weird smoothies.
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So that place is by the beach too, then? ( That's kind of the selling point here, you know. But anyway, apparently it doesn't take long to mix those drinks, because a server comes by to drop them off right in the midst of Kashuu's speech. To be honest, even when he's hearing warnings about them, those drinks don't really look ominous; no swirling, skull-shaped smoke is rising from them, so his skepticism is justified, right? ) Look, there's even one for you!
( Weird, since he only asked for one, but that's fine — Heisuke's gonna pick up his own drink and sniff it just to be extra careful. Nothing suspicious though, just alcohol, and the glass just looks like cream, so he follows it up with a tentative sip, and when that doesn't bring on the hallucinations, well it must be trustworthy, right? So there's a pretty accomplished grin when he sets the glass back down. )
See? It's just fine. No, more like it's great!
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Uh— well, no, but... [They have ponds with alien fish! Is that good? Good enough, surely!
But, more importantly, the dastardly bartender is BACK TO END HEISUKE'S PURE INNOCENT LIFE!! And Heisuke actually takes a sip of his drink before he has the chance to stop him! And then HE-- ...seems perfectly fine?]
...You sure? You're not feeling funny or anything? You can still walk around? You still remember your name? [He's seen so many things. But he'll cautiously pick up the other drink, anyway, because... Heisuke is fine! And if Heisuke is fine, then it might be okay, right?] I'm still not sure about this.
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Indeed! How could I forget that I'm Heisuke Toudou, leader of the eighth division of the Shinsengumi!
( His voice is a lot louder now, and he sounds awfully proud of that title. Despite the fact that he was, you know, quitting before; that's beside the point, he's pretty confident and that counts as proof of things being fine, doesn't it? Expectantly, he raises his glass up for Kashuu to toast with him, speaking up with the same boisterous tone. )
Is indulgence not the joy of life? Come, Itou-san, to the Shinsengumi!
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Wait, wait— You're a Heisuke? ["A"... The first one Kashuu's actually met in Cerealia, to be fair, BUT STILL. He squints as if that might somehow help him determine if this is Actually Heisuke or not, but he gave up on trying to use that tactic for real a long time ago. Apparently gumis just come in every type of variation...]
And I'm not Itou!
[HUFFS. He doesn't want to toast to the Shinsengumi either HE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE... But he is kind of curious. Curiosity killed the cat but that's fine since he's a sword, so just a small sip should be... okay...?! RIGHT. WHOSE DRINK EVEN IS THIS.]
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( Itou is pretty great, after all? The things he says makes a lot of sense, and he's definitely a man worth respecting just as much as any member of the Shinsengumi. Anyway, the drink belongs to somebody just as bold as himself, only a bit more flashy about it. He'll down the rest of his drink before he carries on, apparently satisfied. )
In that case, what should I call you? You must have a name, right?
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