[ never g-quit on me ★ open ]

[bigstick]

Who: bigstick come quick & y'all nerds
When: vague hand waves of datery!! whatever's most convenient for you through the blessing of rp magic
Where: CERES Game Center
What: America's organized some sort of chaotic Dungeons & Dragons based party/competition/tomfoolery. Let's see what happens.
Rating/Warning: Not anything I know of but use your discretion! Foul language at the very least.

---

[ SO, despite america's everything -- it's most likely that the person most excited about tonight is him. he's been posting flyers, he's been talking about to everyone who comes into mcceres, he's been planning his outfit. he's just been so excited! people! places! things! he's gonna have a blast.

he even went so far as to rent out one of the game rooms at the game center this evening. there's tables spread around with paper and pens and dice on each one, there's arcade machines around the edges of the room (racing games! shooting games! pac-man games!) and there's a big table on one end of the wall covered with free food. FREE food. a lot of it is catered by mcceres but for anyone who has had mcceres in the past, it's much better tonight! america's influence as general manager has extended enough to make the mcceres of cerealia comes close, if not equal to, the mcdonalds of america. do you want chicken nuggets? there are definitely chicken nuggets.

when people come into the game room that night, america will be by the door, dressed like a huge nerd (it's a PARTY) and holding a very dumb top hat in his hand. he'll give you a piece of paper and pen to write down your name and drop it into the top hat, saying it's for SOMETHING SPECIAL. that's not sketch at all! he won't leave until the room gets pretty crowded and after that, you can all watch as he takes the top hat and strides over to the middle of the room and hops up on one of the tables. he has a microphone now! dear god, why did anyone give him a microphone? ]

Hellooooo, fellow captives! I'm assuming it's just captives here because if it's any Cerealia natives, you caaaan get the fuck out! Haha, no one needs you here. [ he'll pause for those people to get the fuck out and after a moment, continues. ] Welcome to the first annual Tapletop Games of Cerealia, sponsored by McCERES. I'm your host -- the United States of America and I'm really happy to have y'all here!

[ who is he even talking to ]

Now, you've probably put your name in a hat sometime tonight! [ america... ] This is going to make you eligible for our grand prize! We're gonna have a few games running, arcade, tapletop, whatever. I think I even got a few games of monopoly back there... But the Dungeons & Dragons is the most important here! Because those who play tonight, especially with me, are eligible to win...

[ he bangs the microphone against his palm a few times in a drum roll ]

FIVE THOUSAND DOLLARS or uh, credits, I guess? Whatever! Five thousand of it! How do you win this, you may ask? Easy! Create the most amusing story to tell in your game tonight and you will win. I'm the only judge though so, haha. Amuse me!

[ you sound a bit crazy now, america. ]

Dungeons & Dragons is all about being super duper dope and hilarious and bonding with your friends. So, do that really well and you'll win five grand! Only one person can get the prize though so you're even gonna be competing with the people in your group with you! Haha, suckers.

[ and then he pauses and... ]

I think that's really the most important thing here. Play the game, be hilarious, win five grand if you're super hilarious. Anyway, welcome to the party! Hope y'all have a good time.

[ and then he hops off the table and the music comes back on. good... luck?? ]

(( plotting post HERE and group top levels: ONE | TWO | THREE | FOUR | FIVE

no gen mingle, just make your own top level for easy searching! ))

Comments

GROUP UNO

[bigstick]

[ group one! you sorry souls. right now, america isn't even being really fair when it comes to who he's choosing. he's just going to pass by oz -- grabbing him by his collar -- and then ciel -- grabbing him with the other hand -- and gently drag them over to a table.

after that, he looks around and -- ah! there's the girl. he calls out loudly ] ADA VESSALIUS. [ and waves her over this way. but this only leaves three people! he wants four! so now he's actually going to be fair and digs around in the hat for a name.

... huh. he doesn't know this person but sure, it works out. he's going to grab his mic again and call for one -- ]

ANISE TATLIN. Get over here!

[ and if the embarrassing shout of her name doesn't bring her over, he doesn't know what will!

when everyone gets over there, he's going to sit down very proudly and with a beaming smile -- ]

So, tell me about yourselves. Name. Job. Fun fact. Do it.

[ please just go along with his overbearing self. please. ]

(( order is pretty much the same! oz -> ciel -> ada -> anise -> america ))

aw ye

[harepiece]

[OZ SURE IS just yoinked along by his collar, goodness. He doesn't seem too bothered by it, though?! IT'S AMERICA OKAY he's already used to the shenanigans that come along with the territory. Once he's seated at the table he seems happy as a clam, looking over the cards and things scattered around. AND OH BOY there's Ada and Anise!! What an inescapably great team.

When America spits out that series of questions though, his expression shifts to something a little more confused.]

Is this the part where we make things up? Or are we really introducing ourselves? [EVERYONE HERE KNOWS HIM, but he'll just start off with that anyway and if he's wrong whatever!!]

I'm Oz, and I work as a lifeguard! And a fun fact, um... oh! I learned that the police department here will still come for calls that were meant for the fire department. If you have a toaster oven fire and need help putting it out, you can call the wrong center and still get help!

[how is that fun]

[cheats]

[ How did Ciel end up at this gathering at all?? We just don't know, and Ciel is really questioning that himself as he is dragged off to what he feels like is Hell itself. He's plopped in a seat, but seeing who this group is composed of— ]

I refuse.

[ ...That's it. That's his contribution. ]

[ionicwoman]

[Yeah, Anise has no idea what this is about or why she's here (really, this seems like the kind of game Guy would enjoy), but she won't pass up an opportunity to bother Ciel]

[Among other things, but that is her primary motivation here]

[She toddles right over, sits down, and gives her best winning smile]

Come on, Ciel. ♥ It'll be fun!

[Oh, and also, introductions:]

I'm the super-adorable, beautiful, Anise Tatlin! I work very hard at the gym. [SO SHE SAYS. As for facts...] And I'm single right now!

[HINT HINT.]

[purethingsonly]

[ Ada is actually rather fond of the group. Not only does she get to play with her brother, but Ciel as well. And Anise... well, she's just glad she isn't the only girl.

Oh. Yes. My name is Ada Vessalius... I work at the cosplay cafe here. It's nice to meet all of you. [ Oh yes, and a fun fact... ]

And...

[ Fun fact that doesn't sound super weird... fun fact that doesn't sound super weird... ]

And I ah- I... I like telling peoples' fortunes.

GROUP DOS

[bigstick]

[ group two! you're up next. is this after group one? before group one? who knows! but it's happening.

this time america's pretty fair in his choices, sitting at a table and digging through the hat as he goes. he is not being super PG-13 here though as he has a beer in front of him that he's taking a drink of as he pulls out names. shoveling some chips into his mouth after, he calls out, mouth full, into the microphone. ]

Uhh, Ruby Rose! Rock Lee! Mabel Pines! And Himeko Inaba! Get your butts over here on the double!

[ taking another swig of beer as he puts down the mic and when they're over, he'll ask -- all smiles, ]

So! Name. Occupation. Fun fact.

[ still creepy the second time over! ]

(( RUBY -> ROCK -> MABEL -> INABA \o/ ))

[ruby_roses]

[Ruby was hovering around the food table when she heard her name called. The fact he was using a microphone to announce it kinda startled her and as such she responds standing military straight.]

RUBY ROSE, HUNTRESS IN TRAINING, COMBAT CORGI!

[It's only after the initial shock wears off that she realizes she's being awkward again, and pulls her hood up over her face to hide the blushing.]

[niceguypose]

["Combat Corgi"? Such an impressive title! Rock Lee is determined to make his introduction just as bold! So he quickly shoots up with an even more severe military straightness, and he shouts out.]

ROCK LEE, NINJA, KONOHA'S BEAUTIFUL GREEN WILD BEAST!

[Then he salutes and quickly sits back down.]

[ineptus]

[Wait, is that how these introductions are supposed to go? Mabel had something much different in mind, but after watching both Ruby and Rock Lee...

The girl hops up on her chair to give her some height, standing up just as straight as she can so she, too, can shout her reply.]

MABEL PINES, STUDENT, PROFESSIONAL MATCH MAKER!

[And now she plops back down in her seat, kicking her feet with a grin.]

[dereban]

[ .... Inaba lets out a groan as she rubs the edges of her nose. She's not going to yell her answer; she's too dignified for that, and besides, following the others doesn't sound like fun.

Which is why she'll just stand up from her seat, arms crossed as she speaks in a polite manner. ]

I'm Inaba Himeko and I'm a high school student as well as a salesperson for the Holo stores. Unless you meant my D&D occupation, because that's -- [ She does an evil pose, complete with a villain laugh ] being an evil villain. Unless I'm not allowed to be evil, then I tend to be the balanced user. I used to be the vice president of the Student Cultural Society club and am pretty am an expert in information technology and analysis, so if anybody needs any help in that field, feel free to ask.

GROUP TRES

[bigstick]

[ third verse, same as the first?! yes, america's gotten into the swing of things now and he's just grabbing a handful of names out of the hat as he munches on a burger now. it's happening. let's do this. he's all confident even as he picks up a name and reads it. everything's a-okay!

... but then the color drains from his face. ]

Russia?! What's that dickhead doing here?

[ a very scowly expression as he looks around the room and spots him. with gritted teeth, he tries to find someone, anyone, to make this suck less and... spots vietnam! that'll work. he needs one more non-awful person to balance this out though so he really just ignores the pile of names in front of him and looks around...

katsura! excellent!

... but that's only three people. he'll finally be fair and pick a name now. roll call time! into the microphone he goes. ]

Union of Soviet Socialist Republics! Vietnam! Zura! And uh... [ reading the name again ] Some dude named Levi! Table three, please and thanks. [ a pause and ] Then give me a fun fact about yourself, damnit!

[ this is gonna suck. HE'S GONNA NEED ANOTHER BEER. sorry, levi. your lot in life is not good right now. ]

(( Russia -> Vietnam -> Katsura -> Levi! LET'S DO THIS. ))

[nyet]

[ guess who showed up in a floral cardigan. difference being, floral cardigans are adorable as hell and whatever america's wearing is an affront to eyeballs everywhere.

also, find your chill, america. ]

How like you to provide incentive with money. [ a bright smile as he walks to table three, looking completely harmless! completely harmless in his pale floral cardigan. also completely ignoring that ussr comment, you're not worth the trouble.

even though he's only really here to piss america off, russia's immediately happy to discover that he'll be with friends while doing it. so he'll turn his smile on vietnam when she approaches, and then katsura, wiggling his fingers benevolently in their general direction. his finger-wiggling will also be addressed to levi—whom he doesn't know yet, but will soon. probably. ]

I have never played before, but it seems like it will be a fun game.

[ requisite fun fact: that's only like 75% a lie ]

[hoasen]

[If talking about clothes, Vietnam probably looks like one of the most normal people here (for the early 21st century anyway). Which probably goes to show that in this table of merry friends, she might end up the most normal. Right...? (It might happen.)

Vietnam perks up when America calls out her name! Put with Russia? She's not complaining, but she has a feeling that he called her mostly because she might have to initiate some damage control between the two much later. Unsure if that could happen if Katsura is in this team too though, since he has an unusual rivalry with her, one that she does not want nor asked for?! Perhaps this Levi will help balance the playing table out!

She waves quietly when Russia does, and walks over to join the table. The incentive of money is quite strange, she always thought this was just one of those "role-playing games", not something that involves winning or money? Obviously she hasn't had experience in this either. In fact, why is she here? (Things happen, obviously).]

I have not played this before either. Is it similar to role-playing games, such as video games? Or just a lot of storytelling? [The extent of her experience, yo.

Oh wait, she nearly forgot about the fun fact! There's nothing fun about her, move on already (that's what she thinks).]

[bakudanma]

It's not Zura, It's Zuradrick—, a halfling elf from the eastern coast of Alefgard. I have come to here to ask assistance of those who would be willing to save the princess from the dragon through forms of various magic, though, my venture has seemed to be distracted, as I have come down with a severe illness.

_{[ takes a seat right the fuck next to Russia. Katsura came in proper attire, though lacking a few details he might have liked. ]}

Don't be fooled. My hair is silver, and I have silver eyes that glisten, like lipid tears. I am the only one in my tribe with my hair style, as I am The Chosen One. It matches my iron will, and the balls between my legs which are made of steel. I was once in love, but betrayed and is left forever a wanderer. I always remember to put the toilet seat down for the ladies. These are the interesting facts about me.

_{[ lmao fuck you guys he's already ignoring your question and jumping right into this. ]}

[provoquer]

[Meanwhile, Levi was unaware that they were supposed to come dressed to impress, which is exactly the reason why he looks like he just stepped out of some really terrible Victorian vampire novel. Shut up this is how he normally dresses it was an accident. But, no matter! After giving Zura...drick an appropriate length of shocked and impressed silence, just enough for comedic affect, mind, he promptly ruins it by waving at the table, smile wide and relaxed as you please. He doesn't even seem upset with the rude title tyvm America.]

Hello, hello! I'm also unsure of the rules, but it seems quite amusing!

[And to keep up with the theme of the night thus far, he also doesn't offer a fact about himself but seriously how is he supposed to follow up that introduction.]

Soooo, how do we start?

GROUP CUATRO

[bigstick]

[ okay at this point, america does not have the most unbiased track record. he should be picking names! being fair! not picking faves! he is not doing any of that, no. well he kind of is until he finds someone he knows.

either way, this time he's forgoing the hat. instead he looks around the room and chews on his lip. he wants people who know each other! they don't have to know him but someone more entertaining than his last three batches. those guys sucked.

he spots two pairs who seem pretty chummy as he looks and that's who he decides on. america, your bias. why. so he goes from the table and approaches archer and rin first! ]

You two should definitely go to table four right now.

[ and he doesn't even wait for their reply!! what is wrong with this guy. after that, he makes a beeline for will and nico and with a very unsafe smile, he approaches. ]

You two. Table four. See you in five.

[ AND THEN he himself goes back to table four, with more beer and french fries now. he'll wait for everyone to show up before clapping his hands together in glee. ]

Good! Couples game! Gimmie your names, jobs, and a fun fact about yourself.

(( ARCHER -> RIN -> WILL -> NICO!! GO!!! ))

[swordboning]

[It's loserfest in here but Rin brought him along to it. But they were a pretty handy team together either way.

The fact was, though, that Archer hated games. But when he started playing them, he was absolutely ruthless. This was supposed to be a team game but....hahaha.]

Fine. Rin...

[Pointing the way and grabbing a seat for him and her. Good enough.]

Archer, blacksmith, I shoot bows.

[Worst intro.]

1/2

[codere]

[ Plopping down beside him, she realizes quickly after what was said. Hold on, he just accused them of being a couple and Archer went along with it willingly?! What sorcery is this!! ]

... all right, so since he thinks we're a couple, we have to play that up to amuse him. [ Rin, you are a couple. ] A tragic tale of love and sorrow!

And carnage! [ The chair nearly tips over as she swings her fists in the air, rocking back and forth. ]

We'll slay them all and claim those five thousand credits, Archer!

[codere]

Oh, but I'm Tohsaka!

My occupation is winner and the fun fact is that I'm going to win this thing. [ Her fun fact also doubles as proof of how full of herself she is. ]

[arrowtotheheal]

['Couples,' huh? He decides not to comment on it, especially since he's sure Nico will beat him to the punch. Or not, whatever happens.]

I'm Will, medic at home and weatherman here. My fun fact is that I like to surf.

[Will's got a feeling that this is going to be a very interesting game, just by Rin and...America's (????) dispositions.]

GROUP CINCO

[bigstick]

[ okay last group of the night, he thinks. should be fun. he's tired and probably had way too many beers but you know, whatever!! it's been a good night! this time he's going full random, he's digging in the hat.

he's up on the table again too though so as he pulls out a name, he shouts it into the microphone. ]

Seren! [ another name. ] Cynbel! [ one more ] Shi...hou... whoeever the fuck! [ and finally ] Sheba! Table five awaits you!

[ he'll drop back down to the floor soon after and await his last set of victims. rocking back and forth in the chair, he is pleased as can be and that doesn't bode well for this next group of people. oh... well...!! when they get there, he'll give them his usual spiel. ]

Now, give us your name. What you do for a living. And a fun fact about yourself. Make it interesting!

[ and then he claps a few times before waiting for someone to speak. ]

(( Seren! Cynbel! Shihoudou! Sheba! party hard, yo. ))

[endworld]

Seren here!

[He looks pretty cheerful as he heads on over to the table, waving.

After getting himself settled—]

What I do for a living... Well, back home, I was a priest, but here, I work at an ice cream shop! It's been a pretty weird change, to be honest. I didn't even know what ice cream was when I started—I think I've been missing out all my life!

As for a fun fact... let's see... um, back home, my best friend and I got arrested and locked up in a tower. Wasn't a lot of fun, but I punched the wall apart and threw him overboard so he could get away, so it worked out in the end!

[also the guy didn't fall to his death no worries]

[changeably]

[And in the next chair over, a kid that looks like he went out of his way to dress up like they're LARPing or something. That, or he's just a freaky fairy thing, but come on. What are the chances of that?]

You punched a hole in the wall of a tower, then threw him out? Did he manage to survive?

Ah, as for me, my name is Cynbel. I am a server at a costumed cafe in the shopping district!

[Since Seren apparently choose "most ridiculous thing you've done" for his fun fact, he'll do the same.]

And for something interesting about myself... I once kidnapped a troop of dwarves for my father's birthday. It was a rather flashy affair, but they took it very well!

[makigumo]

[ The one who completely ignores sitting in a chair is Shihoudou. Instead, she sits on a small fluffy cloud, legs spread very indecently. She's dressed even more scantily than she normally is, because she has left her cape at home. Which means she's pretty much naked. ]

Please, falling out of a tower isn't very fatal at all. Granny's done it loads of times. I haven't tried the birthday thing in a looong time, though!

Granny's granny Shihoudou, by the way! I'll be granny to all of you! I work at an erotic book shop and I'm the Poop Queen of the Mibu clan! I'm the biggest poop turd there is and ever has been and ever will be and I usually live in a labyrinth only I know the way out of~!

[makigumo]

[ Of course this old woman knows no boundaries. Anyone who has met her can testify to that.

And because she is a granny who needs to get into other people's business and personal space, EVERYONE will be visited by her. The people that she already knows will even get a sudden hug, lifted off the ground, and TWIRLED before she gives a proper greeting.

Which of course is; ]

So what's a cute little turd like you been up to behind granny Shihoudou's back?


[ as for anyone who DOESN'T know her, she will be all up in your face, a shiteating grin on her own, and the greeting is; ]

Tell granny what your underwear looks like! Or are you like granny who doesn't wear anything under?