estoria | prank wars but against you in particular [OPEN]

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prank wars but against you in particular [OPEN]

Who: Xerxes Break, Oz Vessalius, and YOU, you poor, unfortunate soul
When: Today!! I guess... it doesn't matter
Where: Various
What: Break and Oz are bored, which means it's time to playfully (???) terrorize the populace.
Rating/Warning: these two are a menace

~~prompt~~prank one ; gotta go fast
[It sure is a great day to be out in the park! The sun is shining, the alien fish are burbling away in their ponds waiting for victims to tumble in, and - something seems to be rolling down the pavement... A closer listen will indeed confirm that the noise is coming from something wheeled, but what? A rogue shopping cart? One of the street-cleaning droids? A nightmare from the 90s coming back to haunt the future??

Anyone who decides to look behind themselves will discover that it's definitely the latter. Two harbingers of destruction are zooming directly toward you at warp speeds on their brightass heelys, and it seems like there is either no intention of stopping present, or they just don't know how to stop... It might be the latter for Oz, who heralds their arrival with a distressed-sounding:]

WAH—!!

[DODGE OR DIE.]

~~prompt~~prank two ; this is what the descent to hell sounds like

[ Maybe the park isn't for you, so you're out in one of the shopping districts instead. Usually, the streets are fairly busy, bustling with a little activity, but not so much today. It's as if the people have been scared away... But that's ridiculous, right? Surely nothing bad is going to happen!!

You poor, naive fool.

If you had hopes of enjoying a day of shopping, you might be sorely disappointed when Break and Oz stand from where they had been watching and waiting to strike. This isn't too strange, since they play it cool and just stay a bit behind. That is, until they pull out some very odd looking things and start to begin following you. However it seems these things are instruments, since they start to play them, but the song they play...

It's pretty much the worst thing in the world.

It's easy to imagine buildings falling, skies cracking, seas boiling, Cthulhu rising, all this to this song.

But you wouldn't punch an old man and a child, would you...??? ]

~~prompt~~prank three ; let's limbo some more
[ Well, as it turns out, the otamatones are pretty dangerous just because they have the most likelihood of resulting in bodily injury to Break and Oz. But these two are not ones to be deterred, so instead, they change tactics for their pranks.

A bit later in the day, you'll see Oz and Break wearing matching costumes, so it seems like they're doing a promotional activity for one of the nearby stores! Break is holding a pole, and Oz has the blindfold, so when you approach, Break gives a friendly, jovial smile before he speaks to you. ]

Excuse me! We're doing a special promotion, today only— In celebration of CERES' official commemoration day to limbo, we're holding something of a contest.

[ He nods to the pole, then holds it out for Oz to take the other end. ]

If you can make it to the third level, we're giving away a 500 credit gift card! Think you can manage~?

~~prompt~~prank four ; tping gone wrong
[Unfortunately, all good pranking streaks must come to an end... And the end of this particular trail sure is an experience.

If you're particularly lucky(???), you'll arrive at the scene a little bit after shit has already gone down. The immediate area is covered in something that looks like finely shredded paper which, upon closer inspection, is definitely toilet paper. What happened here?? IT'S A MYSTERY... A mystery that might have something to do with the two hooligans high-tailing it out of there carrying something rather large and bulky.

As for those with a little less luck, you can catch Oz and Break in the act, trying to load a roll of toilet paper onto the front of their gently borrowed snowblower. Clearly they are up to something nefarious and should be stopped...!!]

Oh, I think I found it!

[--But before any dramatic heroics can go down, Captain Moron Oz of the moron fleet flicks on the power switch and the sheer force behind the industrial-strength slowblower literally blasts their entire roll to pieces and probably knocks over a few things nearby. Some flyers on the nearby billboard, a sign board out in front of a shop - a prized potted plant, maybe? Whatever it is, it's probably not something the owner will be happy about when they find out... If they find out. Snitches get stitches.]

OOC — Pick a prompt, and both Break and Oz will reply! For prompts 1 and 4, the tag order is You -> Oz -> Break, and for prompts 2 and 3, it's You -> Break -> Oz!

Threaded | Flat

[ today hawke is working hard at removing graffiti which means she's not really doing much and instead just sort of loitering in various places while dressed like a janitor. her name tag even reads "hawke", she's really proud. a nearby shop suffered some recent vandalism and she's taking her sweet ass time cleaning up the giant phallus on the window.

then she hears break and pretty much abandon the job, walking over to the both of them. ]

Five hundred credits? Really? For something as simple as this?

[ whatever "this" is. HAWKE DOESN'T KNOW but it's just a stick so it can't be that complicated. ]

[Chibi looks up at the rattle rattle nyoooooom he's hearing, and...]

[What's this pack of idiots doing?? Furthermore, if they get any closer, they're going to damage the Important Components in his bag, probably knock off his hat, and everything's going to be a huge mess. (Are those... Shoes with wheels on them? The things people will do for thrills...) With them hurtling towards him at that speed, he can either move himself or move them.]

[So, without skipping a beat, he puts up a blue-ringed portal in front of himself (at an angle to the ground, so they can slide right in), then another behind. Now, the two of them are the ones who'd best move... Because if the spatial-distortion-related motion sickness gets them and they can't land on their feet, they'll fall right on their asses.]

[Unfortunately (fortunately for their well-being???), they picked someone impossible to anger, meaning that they'll be spared punching from him, at least...

Seren was admittedly wondering why the streets were empty, but he's also as carefree as hell, so he went on ahead anyway... and now he knows why. Well then.

He pauses, because that sure is an Interesting Song, before trying to find the right words to say/trying to figure out WHAT TO THINK ABOUT THIS. In the end, he settles for—]

Wow. How long did you two practice for that?

[ ....... thor almighty.

this is just-- what is that. he just came out here for some good old fashioned retail therapy (no, not really, he just needed to pick something up), and he's subjected to this. who did he offend? who did he murder?

why is oz doing this to him?

but he knows how this works. this is like when snotlout or the twins feel like making his day Difficult with a capital D, and he's completely used to this. this is when you ignore them. this is when you ignore them and then they get bored and stop. so follow away, because he has the patience of a saint (spoilers: he doesn't) and he's just going to go on walking and staring at shop windows in interest, like he doesn't have the sound of vikings singing off-key in the shower trailing behind him.

... except his brows are furrowed and it's totally noticeably working but he's. just going to continue ignoring anyway. ]

[ It sure is a nice day to be out in the park! Mary's still working on that Stamina in Public thing, and avoiding the alien fish because she knows they thirst for blood, and so far, all is well.

Until Life (or Oz and Break) happens. Mary happens to be woefully unprepared for visions of terror on rolly-shoes, and "WAH" might as well mean "Well, A thing might just Happen, but go ahead and take your time squinting at us and don't actually move until right before we slam into you", because that's apparently how she's construing it.

One swaying step to the side is probably not going to save her from a collision, but she probably (hopefully) won't die. ]

[The moment he saw the two with the toilet papers and leaf blower, he knew this was going to be a good show.

Quickly, he grabbed himself a hotdog and a soda, and sat on the curb to watch the two unveil their master plan. Then watch then botch it in a fantastic display of Murphy's law. He was expecting a show and they did not disappoint.]

Missed a spot!

[He points at a nearby sign that's still standing. Might want to cover your bases boys.]

[wah????

Ruby was just having a peaceful walk okay.... a peaceful walk with Zwei, of course, because you have to walk your adorable corgis!!! Don't let your adorable corgis get anything less than adorably pudgy, this is a PSA.

Either way, when she hears that distressed noise, she turns rapidly, just in time to dive out of the way of those wheelie fiends and then she does the natural thing.]

Zwei, fetch!

[With a cheery yap, that corgi in all of his stubby-legged glory suddenly blazes forward in full speed, and lunges forward to grab the back of Oz's shirt in his cute corgi teeth, dragging him to a stop. Who knew that RWBY dogs were so stupidly strong--

Sorry, Break, he only has the teeth for one person at a time.]

[Sheba is lucky! ...kind of. She arrives just in time to see that it looks like the immediate area has been coated in freshly fallen snow made out of toilet paper, which is weird enough. Of course, she also arrives just in time for whoever owns the place to be happening upon it himself, and he's not in the best of moods.]

It wasn't me! I didn't do it!

[AND THERE THEY ARE, THE HOOLIGANS HIGHTAILING IT AWAY... Sheba's just going to run after them because like hell is she getting blamed for this.]

Hey! Get back here!

[Does she realize that's Oz up ahead? No. If she did, she might be willing to help him cover this up, but right now she's chasing them down with the intention of clearing her own name... whoops.]

[Luckily Marco is used to dealing with rollerskating morons. On ships, no less, and sometimes his crew even practiced underwater, because pirates and common sense were rarely found together, to be perfectly honest. Especially since common sense did not get you to an elite position in the world's most dangerous seas with the world's most dangerous crew.]

[Unfortunately for Oz & Break, Marco has not grown out of his older methods of dealing with said pirates upon reflex.]

[Which means he reflexively sticks out a leg PRETTY MUCH LIKE AN IRON BAR, and braces the other one into the ground with suddenly... Bird talons?! Yes. Bird talons. Huge ones. Like ostriches would be impressed. It's a thing.]

[Anyway, it's advisable to grab onto said sticking out leg in order to reach a full stop, otherwise you might fall back. Either way, Marco's methods of "helping" are not the best.]

[This also doesn't work HALF as well as he thinks when he's not cutting off a corridor.]

[He doesn't care though, he's not the one who'll get hurt.]

[That's also sort of the nature of "Tough Love" among pirates. If they fell, they had to learn to get stronger.]

[What if someone chooses a third option?

Rock Lee, having recovered for several days now, is now going out for an intense jog. He happens to be heading directly towards the two wheeled fiends, with no signs of stopping.]

A challenge?! I'm so proud!! [And so, he stands his ground and keeps jogging forward. It seems that he's ready to body-slam Oz when the time comes to collide. Who will survive?!]

Threaded | Flat

three!!

one... I WAS TEMPTED WITH THE OTAMATONES THOUGH

how many times have i heard that song aka two...

two!

one!

four!

one.

four

One but omg they are all glorious XDDD

One