estoria | [open]

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Who: abe no "i'm so gloomy now" sousei & all of you people
When: IC: 1/21-23 || OOC: 6/17-20ish WHENEVER
Where: Various, catch him wherever suits!
What: What do you do when your partner's gone missing? Do dumb things and check on all of his adopted children, naturally.
Rating/Warning: None!

a. open - around the shopping district;

[At first, he didn't really think anything was wrong. Tenka going missing was naturally concerning, but he could've been at work, or the like. But as the day drags on and he doesn't show up, Sousei actually picks up his phone to call him.

User not Registered.

That's...that's very bad. Don't mind Sousei just standing in the middle of the sidewalk staring down at the CereVice in his hand.

At least, until he snaps back into action, turns abruptly, and starts going in the other direction. Too bad he didn't look where he was going first, hopefully his abrupt stop and equally abrupt direction change didn't cause any traffic jams.

Otherwise he can be found poking his head into shops and through alleyways and possibly even opening up and peering into trash cans. What does he think he's going to find there? Who knows. He has to give it a try, though. Even if he does look ridiculous with a trash can lid held over his head.]

b. open - gym;

[And as it drifts into the next day with still no Tenka, Sousei has to admit what he very much doesn't want to--namely that Tenka's gone, and they have no idea if he'll come back or anything. The city has only just started to run properly again after that entire ghost scare; still, it's hard to really appreciate that when it's becoming starkly obvious that everything is not quite right now.

Which is why he can be found in the gym even before his shift begins, practicing. It's good to practice. It's a good way to stay fit, and sharp, which is necessary after that entire fiasco.

Of course, he may be taking this a little too far, as the time drags on into hours and his breathing comes in short, sharp pants. He should probably take a break, but it doesn't seem like it's all too likely right now.]

c. semi-open: to tenka's close cr/people he adopted/etc;

[If Tenka knew you or was trying to take care of you or wanted to help you in some way or was even just amused by you, chances are he told Sousei. And now, as it edges into the third and four and fifth day and still no sign of Tenka coming back, he has to admit that that's probably the case. It had taken Soramaru two weeks to come back, so it isn't as though there isn't hope--but even so, he can't leave this for two weeks.

So he goes to perform his Not Fun Dad duties (which, for the record, he never signed up for). So if Tenka knew your address, he'll be awkwardly knocking on your door, or if he otherwise sees you around the city, he'll be approaching.

Awkwardly.

Sorry if you've never met him before, but he has a Duty to perform, and that duty is looking out for Tenka's gigantic swarm of adoptees and making sure they're all okay after that entire ViViD and technological fiasco.]

Excuse me.

[Don't mind him. He's just a little more Awkward than Tenka--and he's a little tired, though it's hard to tell from his face.]

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[Nagasone Kotetsu had once described his bladework as "wild, yet vigilant", and that's essentially something that shows even when he's just running through his practice moves. Precision is key here, at least, so there's no need to be too wild - but the turn of his wrists and the angle of his steps show that he is very much capable of just that regardless.

Another thing that mirrors Okita Souji's style.

But it's nice, being watched. Even if he had basically complained Sousei off of the floor for his own sake, there's a selfish part of him that still likes the attention even so.]

Sure, sure. [He can pick up on that air!! He's more observant than people give him credit for, even if he also doesn't usually know what to do with the things he observes. As for being demanding:]

If I wasn't, you'd still be out here working until your arms popped right out of their sockets, yeah? [That, and he's a demanding person by nature... But it does work in his favor when butting heads with the truly stubborn.] You should get some ice so you aren't super sore tomorrow.

[It'd be interesting to spar with Kashuu, Sousei thinks; interesting in the way that sparring with a human, even an Okita Souji, wouldn't be. Kashuu is a sword, after all. That's entirely different.

Another thought to pursue another time, especially because he thinks he's being mothered by said sword.

What.]

...I can take care of myself. I will handle it.

[He'll at least stretch out properly now that it's pretty clear Kashuu's not going to let him pick up his sword again, even as he watches Kashuu work; it's quiet and unobtrusive and out of the way, so that should be fine. Hardheaded as he can be, he's not as bad as the Shinsengumi, okay.]

I would have stopped before things reached that point regardless. [And, more quietly--] It was not working anyway.

[Kashuu would be pleased to oblige, at least, since this dumb sword that whines endlessly about picking vegetables will always happily be up for a bout of sparring.

Either way, Sousei hasn't seen true sword mothering until he meets Horikawa... He's just voicing some vague concern!! He leaves it at that with a mild shrug, because Sousei prooobably knows the human body better than he does. If he says he'll handle it, that's good enough.

He won't even slip out some snarky remark or question - would you really stop before then? - because he focuses on the quieter statement instead. Maybe someone more emotionally adept could handle this delicately, but nope, Sousei just gets a blunt:]

Trying to get out a bad feeling?

[He's just guessing, but he's seen that before, too. He's seen Yamato try to burn out his grief in swing after swing after swing, and he's seen it fail when he finally ends his session and has nothing to say but my blood is boiling.]

[Thank goodness for Kashuu and all of his dumb sword priorities....

But look, Sousei doesn't need any mothering!! This is already too much mothering. Why is he being mothered by swords. It is a mystery to him!!! But. Not necessarily wrong, either, he notes as he stretches and winces mostly inwardly. Yeah.... he'll have to make sure to ice his muscles, he definitely overdid it.]

Yes.

[Bluntness deserves bluntness! He honestly appreciates it. It's not dancing around the issues, and for that much, Sousei will at least be honest and blunt back.]

Rather, I am addressing an issue that I know cannot be changed at this point in time. [The fact that he's attached...the fact that they can't do anything about the people who disappear.

The fact that there's so much they still don't know.

The fact that Tenka might not remember any of the bridges they painstakingly rebuilt when he does see him again.]

[Swords are surprisingly good at mothering people sometimes?! When they aren't being distracted by their dumb sword priorities, anyway... He'd be smug to know he's right, so it's a good thing that wince is mostly inward.

It's easier to be blunt about things in the meantime!! Kashuu's grateful that his method of communication here seems to be well-received. It's not too surprising, though; Sousei doesn't seem like the kind of guy who minces words if he can help it, which works out well for the both of them here.]

Things like that are hard to swing away. [He thinks so, anyway. He's seen it in humans before too, so he knows it isn't just a phenomenon that affects swords.]

What're you gonna do now?

[Hard to swing away... it's true enough. No amount of practice ever fixed his problems before, so why should they now? Even so, it's a hard habit to break. He doesn't even have the Yamainu here to practice with.

For all intents and purposes, despite the many people around, he's alone.]

I will deal with the problem.

[He makes it sound so easy.

All he has to do is shove away all of those emotions, lock them away in a tiny box, and continue on as best he can, with whatever hope he can find.]

Dwelling accomplishes nothing.

[If only it was really that easy.]

[He finishes up a set, doesn't drop his stance, but doesn't start a new one either. Sousei has his attention for the time being. He's very earnest in his attempt to understand these human things, even if he can't word things well.

But he tries, which is why there's a pause of a second or two before he just outs with his question.]

Isn't it hard to do that, too? Handling bad situations and not dwelling on problems or whatever. I mean, you were just swinging your sword around for hours...

[He knows dwelling doesn't accomplish anything, and he's better at shoving things aside than most, but he's also aware of how difficult it is to really stop dwelling. A beat, and then:]

Is it something you can fix?

[Isn't it hard....

Yes, it's probably the hardest thing Sousei has ever done. But then again, on the other hand, it's what Sousei has always done, from the time he was a child told that his purpose was to grow up and die.

He has had a lot of practice, by now.]

It is what it is. Whether it is hard or not is irrelevant. [That doesn't make a lot of sense, and even he can recognize that, but it's still the truth.]

It's just what has to be done.

[...]

But no. I can't fix it. [He doesn't have the power. And that's...difficult in an entirely different way. Helpless once more... Maybe that's why he had been practicing so hard. At least in his swordplay, he doesn't feel so helpless. At least in that, he is capable of depending on his own capabilities.]

[There's a little noncommittal noise from him, and he goes back to running through his sets. It's clear he's mulling those words over, though; his attention isn't entirely on his practice now, and his expression is vaguely troubled. A lot of that doesn't make sense to him. Isn't it quite relevant indeed, whether or not an emotional hardship is... well, hard? And if it's something that has to be done, but something that can't be fixed... Refusing to dwell on it is just like slapping a bandaid over a wound that requires much more care, isn't it?

But he can never be sure in these situations. He says, with a fair amount of honesty:]

I don't really get it.

[Which isn't uncommon for him, so it's not like he has any trouble admitting that.]

But this is the kinda thing you have to be careful about, right? It's no good getting stuck on a problem you can't fix, but— [A pause as he struggles with his wording.] It's like... Like, sometimes it's bad to go too fast?

[It's okay, Sousei's pretty aware that it's an odd way to deal with things. Healthier than Tenka, admittedly, but a rock would have healthier coping mechanisms than Tenka does.]

Perhaps. [He doesn't know either, really. He's just making his way forward as best he can, regardless of what tries to stop him. Which is basically what he says, a moment later, shaking his head.]

Regardless of that, or of any surrounding circumstances, someone must always remain standing with their head high.

[And it's always Sousei. He's always the last one standing.]

That is enough for me. [That's what keeps him going--the knowledge that in the end, he's the only one left standing most of the time.]

[When Sousei is the partner that handles things better, you know there are Problems™...

And the thing is, Kashuu's seen this kind of thought process destroy people before. He's heard about those who refuse to bend breaking instead, when everything is said and done, but he doesn't know how to put that concern into words in a way that he would be satisfied with. Instead, he looks vaguely discomforted as he picks up his sets with a little more vigor.]

Just make sure you don't lose it.

[Metaphorically in this sense, at least...]

—Anyway! I said it before, but I like you, y'know? So if something's giving you trouble and you don't wanna deal with it, just point me in the right direction.

[He'll go stab a thing for you, Sousei.]

["Lose it", huh... no, nobody's got time for that right now. And if Sousei's going to lose it, he'd rather do so in such a way that he learns how to get Tenka back first, or how to save their worlds, or whatever bullshit CERES is hiding. May as well learn something of use if he's going to break anyway.

(Sousei, that's exactly the sort of unhealthy thought processes Kashuu is worried about.)

For now, though, he's fine. He'll be fine. He's still standing.

Also, he thinks a sword just offered to commit murder on his behalf. What a world.]

...That's unnecessary. [IN SO MANY WAYS. A pause, and he continues a little more awkwardly--] Not that I don't appreciate the offer.

[That is exactly the thought process he's worried about. An offer to commit murder on his behalf is also exactly what just happened here, but hey! Just another day in the office for Kashuu.]

Just keep it in mind, 'kay? I'm not good at helping with a lot of problems, but that's something I can do.

[KILL... PEOPLE. OR THINGS. Really, whatever needs to be taken care of, he's there okay. He's got Sousei's back. That said, he appreciates the fact that Sousei is awkwardly trying to give some weird Sousei version of a thanks, so he just smiles like this conversation hasn't taken a turn for the ???]

When things aren't as bad, you can come spar with me, too!

Edited 2015-06-23 08:55 (UTC)

[KILLING THINGS.... he supposes that Kashuu's not wrong, swords are awfully good at killing things. And sparring. Those are two things...

But even so, he makes a quiet, dissenting noise at that. Swords need to stop putting themselves down, he thinks, even in the state he's in.

It seems silly.]

Perhaps I will take you up on that offer. It would be better than a dance.

Regardless, I would say that your attempts are worth more than you would think.

[At...comfort... don't make him spell it out, it's awkward.]

[LOOK... LOOK!! He doesn't even think he's putting himself down, honestly, because he really is bad at just about everything that doesn't have to do with aesthetics or killing stuff. He doesn't see anything wrong with that either, though, considering both take care of problems...

But what the heck is this shit, Sousei is being kind of cute?? HE'S SEEING GLIMPSES OF THAT SOFT MOE CENTER AGAIN.]

Riiight, right. If you're not gonna dance with me anymore, I have to find something to make up for it with. [Because his poor linefaced comrade is already being awkward enough, so he doesn't have to say he's doing this for Sousei's sake!! Not when he already knows that, anyway. BUT HE HASN'T HIT HIS "BEING EMBARRASSING" QUOTA YET and he can't leave that reassurance ignored even if he susses Sousei probably wouldn't mind that.]

Y'know, for such a serious and gloomy guy, you have a pretty cute side!

[Just what Sousei needs to hear in these trying times...]

[why do you do this.

Sousei was happy to leave it as just a thing that happened BUT NO NEED TO BRING IT UP. But nooo, apparently Kashuu felt the need to bring it up.

And in such a way that Sousei honestly doesn't know how to react.

He blinks, brow furrowing in honest bemusement.]

"Cute"?

[?????]

[he does it because he's kashuu no one can stop him HE'LL COMPLIMENT THE WHOLE WORLD--

But really, there might be some dumb logic going on here too. Compliments always make him feel better, so clearly that's got to be the case with other people, right?? Being called cute is something to strive for!]

Like, that was a sweet thing to say, but you had to be all Sousei about treating me nice. It's cute!

[Sousei has become his own verb already... BUT THEN, back on a more serious note:]

Make sure you treat yourself the same way, o-kay?

[Because he doesn't really know Sousei that well, but he's seen that mentality in enough people to know that it's equally common for them to be rather merciless toward themselves.]

[It's absolutely dumb logic because SOUSEI DOESN'T WANT TO BE CUTE....

And when did his name become a verb???

He doesn't like any of this, way to kick a guy when he's down........]

Naturally I was like myself about this entire situation. I do not know how to be anyone else.

[Stop calling him cute.]

And the way I treat myself is none of your concern.

[Kashuu is completely right.]

[HE'S TRYING, OKAY. HE'S TRYING!! He only knows how to help himself and just tries to apply that to everyone else and it doesn't always work (it works actually like 10% of the time) but he sure tries.

Like now! He doesn't say "see, that's super cute!" like he wants to!! Even though he might as well, with the twinkling amusement in his eyes... But he'll abruptly turn as he starts a different set of practice moves, so at least Sousei won't have to deal with that for long.]

Nope! [what is he noping.....] It's totally my concern now! You won't be able to spar with me or dance with me anymore if you do something stupid and get yourself hurt, and it'll be boring if you're super gloomy.

[Well...at least there's that. If Sousei was any less of a stick in the mud, he'd breathe a sigh of relief when Kashuu turns away. Thankfully he has a little more self-control than that, but it was close. It was close.

He watches Kashuu return to his practice, crossing his arms.]

I won't hurt myself. I am more than well-aware of my own limits.

[This is actually true, he just was purposefully going beyond them like a dumbass.]

I did not say I would dance with you again, however.

Uuuh-huh.

[HE HAS TROUBLE BELIEVING THAT, SOUSEI... Though he also wouldn't be surprised at all to learn he's met yet another person who has no idea how to stay within the bounds of their limits when there's something outside of it that they want. This is exactly why he has to keep an eye out, okay... At least he's well-practiced with running in at the last second screaming WAIT NO YOU CAN'T DO THAT.]

I know! You don't need to say it. Even if you said "never again" I wouldn't give up, see?

[Truly, Kashuu has become a new sword babysitter. Babysitting the dumb sword nerds....

But even so, Sousei scoffs at that, and it's...almost faintly amused. Kashuu has showed this time and time again, that he would go to the ends of the earth for what he wants.]

Yes, I do believe that, somehow.

[Honestly...these swords.]

You're incredibly troublesome, though I suppose stubbornness does not necessarily have to be a negative trait.

[He's definitely right about that... If ever there was a headstrong sword, determined to the point of probably being annoying, it would be Kashuu.]

Yeah, but it sounds like an unattractive one when you put it like that. [But he's not bothered by that, really, because he's used to carrying the label "difficult sword", and this is just one more shade of being difficult.]

I met that friend of yours, y'know? Yang. She said it takes stubborn people to deal with you anyway, so I guess it's a good thing that I am.

[oh god.....there's a moment of existential dread and terror that runs down his spine at the thought of Yang and Kashuu conspiring...............

And then he huffs vaguely.]

I should have known better than to put gossip past you.

[honestly!!!]

Do not listen to her. She is even more stubborn than you.

Um, we weren't gossiping. We were discussing a mutual friend!

[They were definitely gossiping... BUT, that aside, he'll make another blunt statement and observation after a second or two of silence.]

I like her! She seems nice and she's got a lot of great advice. [She also said she'd help ambush Sousei later so honestly, what's not to love??] She even said she'd be my big sister, y'know? [That draws a laugh from him...

And then:] You're friends with good people, huh?

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