estoria | ( OPEN )

out and about a;
[Three days may have passed in the city, but back home, Kashuu's sat through quite a long (and toward the end there, difficult) stretch of time. Blazing through more worlds and sorties and expeditions hadn't been anything outside of the norm until Ikedaya...

But that's a long story and not totally pleasant despite the victory. He'd rather save those thoughts for later, so instead, he focuses on how miffed he is that he was dropped back into this stupid city in clothes that are still battle-torn. Rude?! People with the ability to reconstruct living beings out of data should be able to magic up new outfits, too!! Having to sit through that powerpoint again sure doesn't help his mood, either. He spends the majority of it trying not to meet anyone's eyes, and by the time he gets out, he's feeling pretty unbearably self-conscious. His damage is only on the very low side of medium, but the need to cover the hell up until he can find Haru is strong since it feels like everyone he passes is scrutinizing even the smallest of cuts on his face.

So he nabs a jacket from the first (fashionable) store he finds after stumbling out of ViViD! And he pulls the hood up all the way!! And now he looks shady as hell and it still doesn't really cover up the blood or how messy the rest of his clothing is. This is not how he wants to be seen... Time to book it back home as covertly as possible.

Which turns out to be quite difficult when his vision is largely obscured by this big dumb hood. So maybe you're just minding your own business and knock right into this shit, who barely seems to notice beyond a snappish:] Watch where you're going! [EVEN THOUGH IT'S HIS OWN FAULT.]

b;
[Or maybe you're in the apartment building and you've noticed this bum just sort of LURKING IN THE HALL, peering around the corner, eyes fixed on the apartment door leading to swordhaus... He needs to work himself up for this, okay.

Go ahead and sneak up on him, because his dumb ass deserves it. Otherwise, if he spots you first, he'll - dodge back around the corner of the wall. OKAY BYE!! Nothing to see here!]

swordhaus;
[A few hours pass and he's had a chance to clean up and calm down and settle back in, so SURPRISE, Kashuu has officially returned to swordhaus!

That is to say, he's sitting at his usual spot on the couch with a plate of snacks set in front of him and is scrolling through something on his CereVice like he's been here the whole time. The telltale sign that it's just for show or an attempt to distract himself? He looks up pretty much the instant anyone else enters the room. Clearly his focus isn't anchored on the screen... But like a true champ of Ignoring Things™, he'll nudge the plate forward with his free hand, eyes darting back to his phone.]

Want one? [He's speaking around a cracker hanging out of his mouth... Maybe it's yours?? He just grabbed the first snacks he could find, as long as they weren't clearly labeled.]

[ a few feet behind kashuu, there's a rustling, and plastic bags hit the floor. (haru always has walked lightly, like a cat-- it's not kashuu's fault he didn't hear him coming up.) and sure, the spirit is in a jacket that covers him up so that he doesn't even look like himself from behind, but that doesn't mean a damn thing. he feels like kashuu, especially this close.

he stands there for several moments, green eyes very wide and stunned, groceries forgotten on the floor-- and then he jerks forward, flinging himself at the spirit, heedless of his injuries as he throws his arms around him. ]

I-- I thought you'd disappeared, too! [ if his voice is a little tremulous, kashuu will have to ignore it. ] Kashuu-kun, where have you been? I've-- I've looked all over! I-- [ his breath hitches, fingers white-knuckled in his clothes. ] I thought.. I was afraid you were really gone..

[The rustling catches his attention before the bags even hit the floor, since he's still on relatively high alert, so he turns and--

Ah. For a second, he freezes up in habitual tension. He doesn't look anywhere near as awful as he had the first day that he came to Haru with critical damage, but a flutter of panic still runs through him every time. But before he can so much as consider saying anything, Haru's flung himself forward and Kashuu has to throw his arms out in turn to catch him, mildly panicked.]

Haruji—?

[...It's kind of nice, in a way, to hear that Haru had looked for him. It's nice to know that he was missed, worried after - but he feels awful for thinking so and moves on quickly with a curt shake of his head. A second or two pass before he lets himself hold Haru in turn (somewhat gingerly, to avoid getting blood on him and aggravating his injuries). He definitely hears that tremor, though, and it makes his lips press into a thin line.]

...Sorry. I'm really, really sorry. I didn't even know I was gone until I was already here again. [A beat.] Has it, like... Have I been gone a long time?

[ it's him. it's him, he's here, he's solid and alive and okay, he's going to be fine, ceres gave him back-- he smells the same, he feels the same, his presence familiar and beloved. it settles back into haru's heart and soul, solid and certain, and his breath hitches again as kashuu's arms close around him in turn.

haru doesn't normally seek comfort from others, even his swords. it's his job to be the comforter, after all, and more than that, he doesn't like for people to know when he's upset or struggling. but.. it's been a long, long week, and he's lost both hotarumaru and horikawa, and he'd thought even kashuu.. ]

Don't-- [ he hiccups, lifting his head to scrub the back of his hand over his eyes, wiping away any hint of tears. ] I love you, I'm just glad you're b-back. [ then a hasty shake of his head, trying to reassure him. ] You weren't.. gone long. Just three days. But I couldn't sense you, and you weren't on the network, and I didn't.. I was.. [ scared.

but then his eyes widen again, and he pulls back, pale gaze a little horrified. ] You're hurt. I-- I'm sorry, what happened? Let's-- We need to get you fixed up.

[To Kashuu, he's only been away from Haru for the duration of the sortie, so he doesn't feel the same panic of separation himself. But seeing it in Haru resonates with him, and he ends up holding more tightly, feeling awful because the very last thing he wants is to abandon the ones he loves.

The sleeve of this coat is long, and he pulls one hand away to help dab at Haru's cheeks even after they're dry. He still feels terrible, ugly and messy and gross, but-- then he hears "I love you", and suddenly it's not quite so bad. He knows that Haru loves him, of course. His heart is big, and he loves every spirit that he brings into existence. Still, it's different when it's said aloud, and he chokes on air while he's trying to draw enough in to speak.

I love you is all he ever wants to hear.]

I'm sorry. [He repeats it despite what Haru says, because it's not enough anyway.] Even if it was just three days. I mean, I didn't-- I didn't mean to leave, y'know? [He didn't mean to make Haru cry, either, but instead of apologizing for that, he just says:] I love you - I'm sorry. [Because he's back now, but he had already left once.

Before he can say anything else, though, Haru mentions his injuries (not fully forgotten, but put on the backburner for a blessed second) and the self-consciousness floods back.]

Um— right. I just got back from a sortie, so...

[ he twitches a little in surprise as kashuu wipes at his face, not-smiling at the gentle gesture. even after months spent away from his parents and in the company of what's almost entirely spirits, haru still doesn't quite know how to show how he feels on his expression, but he's at least more relaxed than he'd been those first few weeks. he's.. learning.

he reaches up, curling his fingers with kashuu's, squeezing them gently. ] It's okay. [ i love you. he needs to say it more often. he thinks they all know, he thinks kashuu knows, because he tries to make sure he shows it. but there's a lot to be said for saying it aloud, and they all deserve to hear it.

he takes a deep, trembling breath, stepping in close again to tug kashuu down the few inches that separate them. his free hand pushes the hood back, and he presses a kiss to the bridge of his nose, fingers curling in his ponytail. ]

You're still beautiful, so stop hiding, okay? [ no matter how scuffed or bloodied or dirty kashuu is, he'll always be perfect to haru. it scares him when he's injured, of course, and haru's shaking a little as he drops back on his heels again, but what matters right now is that kashuu remembers that haru is keeping him-- no matter what. ] C'mon. You're okay to walk? D'you want to lean on me? [ he's already urging him toward their door. ]

[Kashuu, often more observant than he's given credit for and especially when it comes to the people his world revolves around, has definitely noticed the subtle changes that showcase improvement in Haru's ability to show how he feels. They're small steps, but - that's about the pace they're all going at, isn't it? And they're going together, at least. No one is being left behind or forgotten.

In an equally small step, while Kashuu reflexively shrinks away once Haru pushes his hood back, but doesn't panic to his usual degree. Maybe it's because he's been placated in advance by a simple "I love you", but he does seem to be trying his best to listen to what Haru is saying. He certainly doesn't feel beautiful, and his strongest desire is to pull the hood back up until they get inside. He also moves to the door of their apartment a little more quickly than someone who's calm would do, but there's no shouting or fits or compulsive freak-outs.]

It's fine - it's not bad damage. I can still walk.

[But he offers a smile anyway, to show he appreciates the offer, and then waits for Haru to unlock the door. His own key is likely still on his desk where he had left it, after all.]

ota; forward dated to 2/18!

b!!!!!

UGH HARU lies on the floor

you did this ok

shot through the heart and you're to blame tbh!!!

stop.. we both know you're the one that makes love a bad game...

i do try.....

Sword haus-ish

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a!

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b....gently tags into this forever late and blames murdergames

grips ur shoulder... murdergames have eaten me too...

let's rip in pieces together...

WE'LL AAAAALL GO DOOOOWN TOGETHEEEER

i never asked for this life!!!

EXCEPT FOR THE PART WHERE YOU TOTALLY DID